How to deal with adamant baby?

Karanu,

I could understand your situation it's really tough for you to manage your kid and household chores...Why you can't try sending her to daycare or playschool for 1-2hrs..I don't know the age of her...that's why I am not sure whether day care or playschool will be okay for her...Even my son when he is around 5-6months he'l keep on crawling behind me and want me to hold him ..at that time i was on maternity leave...he will not go even to my husband..but after putting in daycare I could see lot of difference..now he never cares whether I am there or not..happily plays with his toys for sometime..and plays hide & seek with me sometime without affecting my household work...I think a change of place may change her mind..He is now 11months old...For the initial two weeks he cried a lot but now he prefers to be in daycare and enjoy playing with his friends and teachers...

 

Maybe when she starts screaming try to distract her. throw a ball or play with some toys and ask her to look at it and be consistent.

 

I'm not very sure. Just thinking out loud.
Is this the right age to start time outs?

 

Can't you get any neighborhood kids who can play with her for sometime ?

 

Time out is a phrase used in Western countries. Not sure if someone in India knows what time out is

Anyway here is that I think

To deal with an adamant baby or toddler, you need to say NO. I have seen many moms ( my wife included) not saying NO at the beginning and then repenting over it ( thought she will never admit she is wrong). For example - My 2 year old will wantmy smart phone to watch some videos and she will just give it to her. My wife just need some piece of mind and she does not care if the phone gets damaged or whatever. But if she says no, ofcourse my daughter will scream for some time and then shut up.

What I am trying to tell you is - Say no at the beginning itself. You might have to say NO for 10 times and believe me the 11th time she won't ask you.
But if you give her YES for 10 times, and then 11th time you say NO, she is not going to listen.

Believe in the power of NO. She is at the right age. You have to start avoiding her now else it will be very difficult for you in the future. Kids needs attention all the time. They will make you dance on your fingers and if they don't get what they want, they will scream and do all sorts of things. But you need to show them that no matter what they do, you are the MOM not other way around. You are the person in charge.

 

I think she is too small to play with neighbour kids. She needs 24/7 monitoring

 

With the activity toys, play with her for sometime. teach her how to play, let her follow you; do this for multiple times till she gets the hang of playing with that toy; then let her play alone or keep instructing her while doing your chores like:
1.Put the ball in the bucket
2.or if you have stacking rings; mention the colours and sizes pointing towards them and ask her to put them one after the other and praise her when she does that. this takes time intially you have to play with her;later she will start playing on her own.

 

I second it. Send her to a neighboring daycare for 2-3 hours. She will learn to socialize with kids of her age group. The environment will be stimulating for her as well. You can catch up on house work/naps at that time.

BTW, I do not think it is right for your DH to question your upbringing. If he feels that way, he must chip in and do his bit in rearing of the child. The mom alone should not be held responsible for a tantrum thrown by a child. No offense intended.