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How To Bring Up Kids Teaching Them Respect Of Money And Hard Work ?

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by Benadryl, Dec 2, 2017.

  1. Benadryl

    Benadryl Bronze IL'ite

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    Say Ramu grew up in a lower middle class family. Never received any financial education. Somehow, he managed to grow up into a healthy adult and made good choices in life. Ramu is financially very secure and can provide a very good upbringing to his kids. However it bothers Ramu that his children will grow up in a foreign country (to India) as very privileged children and may not appreciate the value of hard work and money. Without wanting to deny his kids of simple joys that Ramu missed out on, how exactly can Ramu bring up his kids to appreciate money and its value. Any specific examples ? Friendship and its value. Relationships and their value? How can Ramu inculcate the value of choosing good over bad (and firstly to even indentify good or bad)? Whats a healthy way to educate kids about money ? With easy access to drugs and sex how can Ramu teach his children to make wise choices ? Too many questions, but they just show Ramus despondency.

    Ramu understand kids emulate behavior and can try and be a model dad but has doubts if life will provide such opportunities in foreign land where he can act and teach his children thusly.

    I understand not many on this forum have yet seen their kids turn into healthy adults, but I am hopeful many have pondered over this and am very keen to hear all the views.
     
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  2. joylokhi

    joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi,
    I am a senior citizen with two grown up sons, who I would say , by Gods grace, have grown up to be responsible and healthy adults. I believe there are many factors involved in how a child finally grows up to. Some children with very bad parenting too end up doing well for themselves. On the other hand, there are others who have messed up their lives in spite of the best efforts on the parent's part. I am listing my personal opinion here , which may not be the only right way. As u have rightly said, children learn a lot and imbibe everything from their parents. So a beginning is ensuring we do what we feel we would like our children to follow. Where finances are concerned , at present times we cannot go on harping of how we had struggled in earlier years and expect children also to do the same. However, within reasonable means we can fulfill their needs and wants, which is within ones capacity.
    Another important thing, is being involved in their lives at every stage. By this I mean knowing who their friends are, their interests apart from academic etc. Children should have the confidence that they can talk anything on their minds with parents. As is known, teenage is the time to look out for and be there for children in all ways. With open communication and involvement, chances of children going astray would be rare.
     
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  3. Naari

    Naari Platinum IL'ite

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    I wonder the same for my Dd. In a world now when each of us seem to have one or two kids & with both parents working, it’s very hard not to spoil the kids. They are showered with way too many toys, way too many electronic devices, fancy clothes, fancy , well decorated rooms & so much more. They are showered with things they don’t even realize they need and much before they need like the iPads or fancy smart phones.

    I do believe it’s important to give kids a taste of austerity in their upbringing much like the Narayan Moorthys’, but I have yet to execute it. But OTOH, I don’t even want Dd to compare herself & her belongings with other kids & feel like she is being denied fancy things by her parents. I think it’s a thin line to balance & am interested to see what others here did.

    I do want to point out that this issue is also prevalent in India because the Indian educated youth is making millions, much like their US counterparts. So, I am thinking this problem is almost universal now.
     
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  4. fourthaugust

    fourthaugust Gold IL'ite

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    I always wanted to inculcate middle class values in my kids. My elder one is over five years old and his teachers have always praised him for being very down to earth humble helping and caring to list a few. I am not sure how he will turn out in future but he at present he certainly is what I wanted him to be.
    For this, I never loaded my kid with too many toys. He is always given only the toys that he truly likes and plays with while other kids have a room full of toys. I feel it makes kids more focused into what they have and utilise them fully. Also we spend a lot of time with him. We play with him we dance with him . He helps me with household chores whenever he is around and much appreciated for that. He has a lot of friends he plays with and attends activity classes too. I guess giving limited luxury is the first step towards keeping your kids grounded and another thing is to spend a lot of time with the kids.
    One more thing that I found useful is the gift of sibling. I have two sons . Younger one is into his toddlerhood bit oh boy they know how to have fun.
    I am proud of my elder son because when I see around, among many tantrums throwing kids, he is one very well behaved and soft spoken child.
     
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  5. uma321

    uma321 Platinum IL'ite

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    My kid #1 is 3 years old and I follow the below actions to teach him money values.

    We follow a budget and we cannot buy if there is no money in the budget. If the kid asks something, we explain to him why we cannot buy it now.
    We don't buy toys every time we take him shopping.
    We delay shopping - even if he wants something right away.
    We try not to waste things - when he wastes food, we tell him not to do it. Now even if I waste food, he would tell me to not to waste it.

    There are the few things I can think of. Our kids learn from our actions and valuing money starts from us. It's early to say if my son is learning any values. But we want to keep trying and keep teaching him the value of money.

    Looking forward to knowing other methods fellow parents are following to teach money values.
     
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  6. stephanjohn

    stephanjohn Senior IL'ite

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    wow so great insights!
     
  7. sheztheone

    sheztheone Platinum IL'ite

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    Good topic OP.

    I for one am proud of my middle class upbringing and mentality as it helps me stay grounded, makes me appreciate what I have and also makes me motivated to achieve more.

    Some points that I follow with our 9 year old, who we are raising outside of India.

    - On the days that we do not use the car, I insist on taking the bus or walking it down to save money, and for exercise; instead of flagging down a taxi.
    I also explain how much money we save each time and what we could have bought with this.
    - Have taught him from the time he was 2, that you do not waste food. To this day, he tries to finish off what's on his plate.
    - We pack his clothes/bags/shoes etc that he's outgrown and take them to India every time. We make him hand them over to the maid, cleaner, flower lady etc for their kids. We explain that there are people who cannot afford even basic things in life so that he learns to appreciate them.
    - We constantly remind him to switch off the heater, AC, TV etc while not in use and to not waste water, soap, toothpaste, cream etc.
    - Maintaining his own wallet/piggy bank; he also learned the different notes/coins and how to count money, through this.
    - We send him grocery shopping now and then; he knows now the approximate prices of some items like milk, yogurt, biscuits etc. When we go shopping for costlier items like cakes or Godiva chocolate, I compare the prices of these with regular grocery and explain that price is one of the reasons (besides health) why we do not buy these often.

    Each child is different, and parents can only do what they feel is the right approach to inculcate certain values in a child.
     
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  8. stephanjohn

    stephanjohn Senior IL'ite

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    Thank you for the great insights. It is definitely a great help to parents seeking ideas to explain their kids about the importance of money.
     

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