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How Not To Panic During Lockdown , Especially In Joint Family?venting

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Needtobestrong, Apr 23, 2020.

  1. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Platinum IL'ite

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    These days I’m unable to sleep peacefully..this covid19 situation is draining me out...
    Daily I’m getting only bad news about covid cases...words like Pandemic, epidemic, community transmission etc are scaring me...due to Covid19 situation my in-laws cancelled few of their other plans and are living with us...they will stay for longer duration here only...no maid allowed here..any ideas I may have about minimising my household and cooking work can’t be applied when in laws are here...some days if they sit and don’t do anything I get irritated...if they pitch in and do some small work they get irritated and complain about being tired due to age etc..
    Many arguments happened with them during their duration of stay here...for different reasons related to past issue...the stress made many unresolved issues to come to surface and bubble over to full fledged fights...it wasn’t that bad earlier as they had other outlets...
    My DH also is also tired and stressed out and is being mean and disrespectful to me..so not getting emotional support from him now..
    Having health issues but OPDs are closed so couldn’t consult specialist...Was supposed to get some blood tests done but risky to go to any hospital lab ..I needed alternative medicine treatments but clinics are all closed and I’m afraid to step out even after lockdown gets over....
    Getting worried thinking of Indian economy getting affected...started to apply for jobs but delayed and put on hold it for time being ...worried thinking about health and safety of my family members...generally my health hasn’t been good lately so afraid to endanger myself further..
    People sharing forwards and videos and emails about covid..overload of information..
    How can I just chill and be calm and cool in this situation?
    I tried watching Tv shows and movies to relax my mind...helped only to some extent...many days im too busy and don’t get time to watch these..
    I don’t have any hobbies as such, even if i try doing self development stuff and learning I’m interrupted by some one or the other so me - time is less...
    I m good at cooking and don’t need dislike cooking as such, but cooking special dishes would involve washing more utensils and more work..
    So I keep experiments at a minimum and stick to a regular menu and cook special dishes only occasionally...
    It’s tough without maid in India, risky to keep maid also...feeling tired with extra work...
    Pls don’t think I’m cribbing...just feeling low...does the panic and tiredness ever go away? Any effective suggestions to be happy and cheerful during this time? Don’t know when things will be “normal” again...
    Pls be kind in your replies and give some suggestions to be happy and positive minded during this time.,.
     
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2020
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  2. startinganew

    startinganew Gold IL'ite

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    Hi @Needtobestrong - This is not an answer to any of the specific issues you have stated, but I am planning to use this for my well-being given the new situation we all find ourselves in:

    Source: Instagram from a fitness trainer with the handle "trainwithnair". A lot of these, we all know already but this representation was a good reminder for me.

    upload_2020-4-23_10-41-34.png
     
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  3. KashmirFlower

    KashmirFlower IL Hall of Fame

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    First priority is definitely health, try virtual appointment with doctor and get the medicine needed, or just from pharmacy get old prescription medicine.

    One can’t do all, assign work to Everybody, morning breakfast mil. Lunch cook more , dinner only rice or chapati,

    Dishes may be to husband. Or washing machine.

    Kids sweeping and mopping.

    Getting back Normal is far away, only watch one time news to keep fear under control.

    Self care in all ways as that tea cup shows should be done by you only.

    Go mouna vrat on few days it helps may be
     
  4. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Get away from social media for 1 day and see the difference. Don’t watch news too. I tried it and relatively I’m feeling less stressful.
     
  5. ImHuman

    ImHuman Bronze IL'ite

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    I dont worry much nowadays. But few years back I used to worry about lot of things.. I would react to all kind of problems... Injustice, situational problems, calamities... ,What would go wrong etc.. and such worry drains me that I would not be enjoying task at hand or my life...

    Through years I learnt to slow down my anxiety and learning to live life...

    When I find myself panicking or start to worry, I will remind myself of the current moment. I make myself aware of the sorroundings.. The Sun : Always bright in India.. Just a thought of The Sun God gives me a feeling of light in my life, fresh energy and so on... What a beautiful day...air around us... We are breathing .. we are alive..we have food, shelter today... What a great day to live , what a joy to be alive ,

    Just carry on your duties and be alive...

    Again there is one golden rule
    " Our mind is like a radio . It will stream what we tune it into. If we want a different stream tune it to different frequency".

    And just think of moment,task at hand. Do your duties .. and think of what is that we can do in any given circumstances...... Do what we can and leave rest to God .
     
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  6. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Platinum IL'ite

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    Thanks all..
    Ladies pls keep the replies coming...just now I came across some news of new cases of Covid in my city and few wards nearby and within 20 km to my locality. ..its tough not to panic...
    Even if I dont deliberately read news its everywhere and I get notification from some source or the other...
    I really have to put in lot of efforts into this..
     
  7. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    I am following few things from few days for the same problem:

    1. Don't watch news.
    2. Wake up early and read Ramayana.
    3. Think that whatever work I am doing given to me by God and it helps me stay busy and at least he has not given me any suffering of this pandemic as of now. So I should be thankful for this.
    4. It's necessary to increase our count of good karma at this time as that's the only thing that could save us from this.
    5. Play with all kids for an hour daily at terrace that take away all the tensions of the day.
     
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  8. Mehana

    Mehana Platinum IL'ite

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    Good question especially at this time.

    Stressful situation for everyone in different angles.

    I am stressed out as well with my special need kid as all his therapies are online and reduced the time duration. My kid need 1:1 support for all his needs so i have to be seated for all his sessions Mon to Friday. Initially I was stressed out because I have to manage other house chores, my work and I have other little one.

    But I felt bad for my elder kid because his routine are changed, stuck at home, his needs are not meeting...

    I totally understand with in-laws overwhelming especially if you don't get much help from others.
    1. Stay quite and relax if you stressed thathelps to relax your mind

    2. Try not to compare yourself with others if any of your friends or relatives who post any video or pictures themselves ... some people does that if you going to be stressed thinking about others your happiness will be gone. Just focus on your priorities...I gained more peaceand happiness once I stopped thinking about others life.

    3. Relax...eat your favorite snacks..

    4. How old is your kids .are they old enough to take care themselves?

    5. Enjoy your time eating healthy food and watch favorite old movies

    6. Try one day relaxing, not caring about social media pictures , be patient and prioritizing your list..
     
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  9. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    :thumbup:
     
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  10. Vaikuntha

    Vaikuntha Platinum IL'ite

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    I used to worry about health of my loved ones but one day, a realization came upon me, when it's time, it's time..no one can stop birth or death

    Don't do so much of housework. Your health is suffering because of taking so much upon yourself. Do delegate BF to MIL and dishes to DH, like KF said.
     

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