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How Marriage Helps For One's Personality Development

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by padmaiyangar, Oct 26, 2007.

  1. padmaiyangar

    padmaiyangar Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear young couple,
    please read once and you may get some tips to lead happy married life. and I hope it is more useful to newly married one.
    MARRIAGE HELPS FOR ONE'S PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

    In marriage one's good character, conduct and morality are the security for the another in life. Parents' interest in bringing positive character in their children is in the interest of their children, whereas in marriage the interest of one partner in the positive character of the another is in the self-interest. In practical life, in fact, that is the main reason for pointing the another's negative characteristics in marriage, but, this criticism, instead of bringing the changes, only begets resistance. the solution is first to encourage the positive characteristics of the another thereby bringing up better personality development. Once the development of personality starts yielding the beneficial results, the beneficiary partner develops trust and faith in the other; there appears the vital factor, viz trust, for changing the negative characteristics.

    Basically marriage is for mutual benefit of care and security, wherein taking care of personality development yields benefit to the other and begets security for the self. Therefore every person should realise the pertinence of personality development in marriage which serves the main purpose of marriage, i.e. benefit, care and security.

    When you want to change this negative characteristics of your partner in marriage, the basic requisites for you are tolerance and patience. When you like the positive characteristics of the partner and enter into marriage with him/her, that means that you accept him/her as a package in your life. The package consists of the both positive and negative. You can not leave the negative and take the positive qualities only; rather, you have to accept both as a package. However, you nourish and encourage your partner's positive characteristics and tolerate the negative characteristics. Once you nourish his/her positive characteristic and make him/her to beget benefits and create happiness, slowly he/she will develop trust and faith in you. On creation of such trust in your intentions being good in his interest, slowly try to modify his/her negative characteristics, one by one, thereafter change the characteristics. For example, 'telling lies' is a negative characteristic and not good for a smooth marriage, and 'telling/speaking the truth' is the positive characteristic. Slowly try to modify the habit of 'telling lies' to 'not telling lies', but it does not mean that truth should be spoken. This modification is easier to accept rather than abruptly changing over to telling truth only. Thereafter from 'not telling lies' you can smoothly, in the course of time, change to your goal of 'telling the truth' to you.

    Both might have come from different socio-cultural values, and both may have different personal values, as such the perceptions, attitudes and approaches differ. Even though the apparent attitudes and approaches differ from each other, due to the above mentioned factors, neither should construe the other's to be wrong as no value is wrong unless the consequence hurts the other/others. Therefore, a magnanimous and open-minded analysis paves way for understanding; the right attitude and approaches with ultimate maturity; there the person becomes the real man/woman and can lead his/her unit of society, i.e. family, in the right direction. This maturity gives the person the self confidence in choosing right and wrong which maturity is essential to guide their children in the right moral path which should be practical and as well helping them to build self confidence will-power which are essential pre-requisites for the moral side of one's personality.

    The socio-procedural interactional values may differ between the couple. The open-minded analyses of both the values and adapting the correct values paves way for the right interactional procedures, which, in turn, makes him/her perfect in social attitudes and boosts his/her image in the society. Therefore the marriage helps every one to get exposed to the reality and to understand the purpose of social values thereby enables to change in tune with the time and society to beget better image and improve one's personality.

    In a family, except between husband and wife, the interaction between the opposite sex is by affection, not by attraction, only in marriage, especially in a very traditional/conditional society, the interaction between the partner is by attraction. Therefore, your marital partner is the only person with whose intimate reactions you can easily understand the expectations of the opposite sex thereby you can present aptly in the social interactions with the opposite sex for a better image, or respect among them. That improves your physical personality image well and gives immense satisfaction being male/female.
     
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  2. solonacea

    solonacea New IL'ite

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    hey nice article ,i really enjoyed reading this its alll fact .i can say now i have started knowing myself aftr 10 mnths of my married life .its a beautiful relationship n we should respect it.thanks to our indian culture
     
  3. puni88

    puni88 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hello,
    Thanks for the wonderful article.
    I can see myself that I have changed so much in a positive way.

    ~Punitha
     
  4. BharathiRajesh

    BharathiRajesh New IL'ite

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    Hi ,

    Your article is very very nice.

    Regards,

    Bharathi.R
     
  5. Anabika

    Anabika Silver IL'ite

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    Very nice article Indeed
     
  6. supriyaakp

    supriyaakp Bronze IL'ite

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    Really wonderful article ma'am.
     

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