How Many Of You Are Adjusting With In Laws For Sake Of Kid? Good Idea Or Not?

Never contradicted. Perhaps, given the nature of her IL's she channeled it well. No doubt there are genuine cases of supportive and caring in-laws, like 1 outta 100. And no harm in tweaking to avoid confrontation if it keeps everybody happy. Its all situation based. Today's world survival is of the fittest be it marriage front, work front or home front.

 

your post appeared to challenge and break the traditions "woman to take help from her parents .... as she is their own blood."

 

Why parents don't have a life and their lives live around their son?? Why insisting on living with their sons after marriage. Interfering in everything. Barging into the young couples room without even knocking.
The list goes on.

 

I agree, everybody has a right to their own lives good/bad and poor/rich. Children boy/girl after high school should venture on their own. Get a job, if they choose, save up and go to college or get scholarship and work part time to support themselves. No arranging marriage nor dowry/spending lakhs and lakhs on weddings. Boys and girls should have the freedom to make their own choices to find their own mate - the most important decision of their lives.
One of my friend told that his mom gave her bangles and chain for her son's college fees and i am sure similar sacrifices are made by girls parents for education, wedding expenses/dowry.

 

There is an easy solution lock the door

 

There is no lock in any door in that house. Installing one will create a huge fight in the house by the mom

 

But all this will work if husband is in wife’s side or atleast is neutral
If the husband is worst than MIL and hell bent to make things bad for her then all the iq + eq of the wife, won’t work.
But most men are not so coniving so above solution of using the weakness can work.

 

IVF is no joke. Let me tell you. It's not an option for people who want to "change trends " just because they want to show the society that they want to be their parents.

Celebrities who are opting for it these days and others who want to follow this trend have their own fights and struggles for going for it. Don't think it's right to generalize that women who want their parents to be with them will opt for this.

 

As humans and women in general there are two mistakes we widely do when confronted with a situation dealing with IL's. We get emotional n cry to our H which simply shows our weakness or there is an outburst. Some give in which again is an issue as they will only b taken for granted. Rightly said about Men- they are conniving, typical MCP's (regardless of how educated they are) and deep down too rooted to their moms. Now its all moon n stars for the DIL till the honeymoon period fades off and the DIL is so carried away by the 'happily ever-after romance' portrayed in movies that she misses out the larger picture or only realizes it too late. A smart DIL if she understands the main essence of marriage would work on knowing her IL's thru her H (trust me they are the weakest during the honeymoon fest ) so that she can have a POA ready to execute and deal with her IL's. Problem with our society is we speak volumes about marriage, committment, relationship but never educate our younger woman what they can anticipate after marriage. Counselling happens only when the situation get worse or bridges are burnt. It would be wiser to prepare girls and get them to understand about 'Marriage' and what it is all about.

 

This is an opportunity for negotiation! You don't barge into the room, knock for us to open the door; otherwise, the door will get the lock. It is your choice.
This may lead to some kind of resolution.