@sadwife, The root cause of the problem is you are living in the past. You need to move on from what happened in the past in order to enjoy your present life. Don't link your happiness to the reactions of your husband or anyone else. Your happiness can purely be driven by your own thoughts and actions. You think by wishing your MIL to die is going to let you overcome your anger. Certainly not. It will linger in your mind even after she is gone unless you learn to overcome your anger yourself. It is not what she did but it is your own reactions to those actions that bothers your mind always. You can't control her actions but you can managing reactions to them is entirely in your control. I am not saying you didn't suffer. You did in the hands of your MIL. But that thought is putting down your self-esteem and hence hurting you whether she is with you or not. More you suffer, you are handing over the victory to your MIL on what she originally intended to do to bring division between your husband and yourself (if that is her intention). You should put up a brave face and handle situation well unaffected by her shenanigans by confronting her by standing up for your own values. Even if you don't say anything instead smile at her stinging words, her heart will break. Take your husband into confidence and explain that you have a right to defend your self-esteem. He is already confirming it by agreeing to reprimand her if she were to use any harsh words against you. You need to understand that your anger is ruining your mental and physical health more than your MIL's. She is probably feeling happy every time she hears about your anger. Defeating her intention is the best way to handle it. Please consult a therapist who will guide you through this process. If you truly like to destroy her will to hurt you, you should show a great level of togetherness with your husband and prove it to her that your relationship with him is unshakable and he is going to stand up for you. That is the best way to overcome this problem. Every time you show your displeasure with your husband about her, please remember it is a mental victory for your MIL whether she comes to know about it or not. I wish you the best in your life.