Has Your Husband Ever Taunted You Like This?

Take a chill pill dear. I have also compromised my career for both my kids sake. No my husband has not taunt me like this but you know...i feel even if he does I would just ask him to shut up reminding him that I am doing my bit as a partner by taking care of kids and by being a bread winner, its the least he could do for his family .
Since it is said in the anger I don't think you need to take it so seriously. In a long married life people say all kinds of things to their partners. Its better to ne forgotten and forgiven at the same moment.
My only concern is are you not happy without job?
In yes, then find something suitable. But if you are , then no need to heed such taunt as they are short-lived and will be conveniently forgotten by your dh too.

 

No not said. But I can say that lot of us women derive our sense of identity through our careers. And I think you are too & in some corner of your heart are not too happy sacrificing that. And maybe that’s why his statement hurt you so bad.

I would say, get a job & make it work. He may not take up the entire job of getting kids ready & drop them off to school but he can help you get them ready & one of you can drop them to school.

If you ask me this all kids or all career choice is a path to “no redemption.” Either way it pinches you too bad. Balance it, get both & get your self esteem back. Take care!

 

Tell him he gets free daycare/ child care, free driving , free housekeeping and other services . Find out what the market rate is and tell him he owes you that amount every month. Don’t forget to charge overtime for the times he travels.

 

Well said

 

Invite him to sit at home and do your job. You go out to work and then tell him he gets to enjoy for free. Let's see how he likes it.
But if you really want to work for your own sake and you have a good offer hire the help you need to run your household smoothly. Don't let his lack of assistance hold you back.

 

dear Op !
pls give him this ouchh
let us know

 

Central jersey - Edison , woodbridge area .

Cost of in house nanny for 1 kid - Morning - 9:00 am - 6:00 pm - close to -- $1400 . includes cooking .

Nanny to drop and pick kids from school if no school bus - 10 $ a day
Nanny to drop and pick kids from kumon, karate class, music class , library - list goes on. here it is transportation cost and waiting time

kids will not sleep by 6:00 pm. then between 6 :00 - 9:00 . homework , feeding and playing - additional cost.

weekend groceries , costco .
washing clothes, if you are living in apartment . and common laundry.

i live in 3rd floor, DH takes all the clothes. he gets really tired. it is close to 70 lb for 4 people. that no nanny will do.

nothing is free food here. rest he can do the math.

ofcourse i forgot. - cleaning the whole sink of dishes at the end of the day when all you want is lie down and watch some tv. indian dishes are horrible, greasy and hard to clean.

 

OP - as madatmanoj said he is frustrated on something else and it has come out like this. It is not that you are not working, only you are not earning money. He is not asking you to do double work - to run home, take care of children and earn money.

 

Now this is the last thing anyone should say to a wife who has sacrificed her all for the sake of her family. People need to know your worth. Take the help of your parents/in-laws/creches etc to manage your children. They are indeed the most beautiful part of your life but do no keep sacrificing your happiness for their sake. Take up a job and if work from home is an option, then nothing like it. Earn for yourself, be empowered and do not take crap from anyone.