Handling the post partum phase by myself

nayidulhan · Jul 5, 2010

Hi Friends,

I am some 4 months away from my DD in October and I need some advice on handling the baby, her needs, etc. I live in India and I may not have access to any maid/ domestic help after my delivery. So I want to know the ways of keeping the baby related work to the minimum. Like I guess doing the laundry, cleaning baby's feeding bottles and other utensils, pacifying her and putting her to sleep (I hope I haven't missed any other important thing here) will be the primary duties for me. Could someone please suggest ways to reduce the work related in this regard/ keep it to the minimum? Like I assume that not every new mother in the US (or for that matter even here in India) is priviledged to have family or nanny support at hand. How do these mothers handle the post partum phase?

If I decide to use disposable diapers for my baby right from the beginning, can I use these 24 hours a day? Which brand is the best for constant use? Can I start using these right after she is born? Please guide me.

Also, I have heard that BFing can be painful initially if the baby does not latch well. I don't have access to any lactation classes so could someone please guide me in this regard as well.

Does anyone have any idea about any organizations, etc which may provide trained/ experienced nurses to stay with me through out my hospital stay? has anyone opted for this kind of a service before?

The very thought of handling all this with minimum support sends shivers down my spine. I hope by the grace of God I am well equipped to take care of this phase. :bowdown

Vishalini3 · Jul 5, 2010

Nayidulhan, Its sooo nice that you want to plan and be prepared for the newborn phase without support, my hats off first You would do it well then
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/infants/95827-balancing-baby-personal-space-without.html
This thread could give you tips, on how to save time, with minimal household chores.
On Lactation consultant, LC, I dono which city you are in, check with your gynac, wherever you are planning the delivery on LCs. Otherwise post us the city, some of our friends here might help you to find one
Do read around all the sticky links here - http://www.indusladies.com/forums/infants/37088-check-here-first-alphabetical-list.html
:thumbsup

loonypooh · Jul 5, 2010

nayidulhan, u would be where i was when i delivered. no support, just me and DH, so i can talk from my experience.
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i realise u would be having a maid for domestic help like utensils, mopping etc?we had one , but all the baby related work was on my head, and DHs.

i had a c section delivery, and let the whole world scare u, but let me tell u i was on my feet from day 1 of the surgery. My doc told me, the only way to perfect and speedy recovery, is to get moving, little by little after delivery.

i was home 4 days after surgery, when i knew i had no one but only self and DH to do everything that was babyrelated, including our cooking too.

we jotted down a plan. like these many chores DH will do, and those many I will.
heres what we did.

1.i had prepared batches of sambar and daland frozen in advance.
tomato puree and coconut pastes and any such pastes were store bought. most times we got pre cut veggies from the supermarket. if not DH would ask the maid who came to clean vessels to spare 15 mins and do the cutting.

2.DH had NEVER done cooking so he wld take his laptop in the kitchen ,follow the videos and cook...

3. we got small appliances like rice cooker, chapati maker,food mandoline etc.

5.chicken broths and veggie stock was frozen, which i used to make soup for myself everyday.

6. breakfast was always kept simple yet healthy. muesli, oats, cornflakes with lots of fruits.

6. we never bothered if the kitchenwasnt clean, or the room was a big mess.

About baby tasks.
1. due to my c section, we only gave sponge bath to her for the first 2 months, In a way its better too, since itty bitties dont really need elaborate bathing.
2. DH would give her massage, clean diapers, change her,burp her, for the first 15 days when momma was recovering.
3. we used disposable dipes for the few wks, after which we moved onto cloth diapers, and laundry was done by DH.
4. we chose to exclusively breastfeed, so we didnt hv to bother to do the bottles,etc.
5. DH wasnt good with waking up at nights, he still isnt. so for most times i would wake up to feed her, clean her, at night. ofcourse if i was overtired i would somehow wake him up. (had to hit him really hard with pillows lol).but he did the rocking,putting her back to sleep once he was up.
6.we kept people coming home to minimum, rather NIL, so that we didnt hv to bother about the messy home, meeting people, etc etc.

coming to breastfeeding. YES it is painful till u and baby understand it.
i spoke to Tikka(from IL) she gave me pointers and refered me to various sites.i would pester my doctor/nurse whenever they came to chk on me for the 4 days of hospital stay. And she would teach me everytime, how to go about it.also my gynaec was fantastic, that immediately after 1 hr of delivery, she latched the baby onto me. This is very important.Also she asked the nurse in the recovery room to keep giving me baby every 2 hours. Since i was yet not able to sit up, i would just lie down and my baby would be kept on the chest.this way we did the "breast crawl".

when we came back home, DH sat with me and we watched a few videos on youtube, he helped me latch her... so we both were onto it and we did it!
the fifth day milk started coming in, and me and baby were doing much better.
keep lanolin cream handy. whenever u feel discomfort give some warm washcloth massages.i almost always kept applying nipcare to help soothe my sore bleeding nipples.
soon it all got better.
nayidulhan, if u ever have to have another baby, i rather prefer this set up,than have ask my parents to come over, or beg my MIL.
u really have positives to it, brings in a whole new confident person and gives u and ur DH some privacy with ur bundle of joy...!
You can do it if i can!
good luck and sorry if this was TMI!