1. Have an Interesting Snippet to Share : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Would you like to join the IL team? See open jobs!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. What can you teach someone online? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice
  4. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

Guilty, My Lord!

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by HariLakhera, Mar 21, 2021.

  1. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,579
    Likes Received:
    1,723
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Male
    GUILTY, MY LORD! (Based on actual incidence)

    Sometimes in 1964, I was going from Banglore city, (now Bangaluru) Mysore State, (now Karnataka to) Hubli, still Hubli by train on some company work. On the train, I met a gentleman from North India, who was also going to Hubli on his company's business. Like me, he, a jolly good fellow, had also been posted in South India. We became friendly. It was decided that we stay in the same hotel on room sharing basis and split the expenses. I was new to Hubli so reached a hotel suggested by him and it was obvious that he had stayed there.

    In those days, there were no credit or debit cards so we had to carry cash tucked in the inner pocket of the pant. Even though we had turned friendly, there was no point in trusting blindly. Following the edict 'Better be cautious than repent' I thought to be cautious and hid the cash somewhere. I am sure he must have done the same. We had some beer with dinner and said good night to each other.

    The next morning, when he was in the bath, I checked for my cash and it was not there. I checked the attaché and all my pockets but no trace of those notes. Fact is, I had forgotten where I had hidden the money. My first thought was, yes your guess is as good as mine, that he had swindled me. Above all, no one else came into the room. At the same time, I did not want to be naive and charge him openly. I thought of checking his pockets but somehow restrained myself.

    I put an urgent call to our regional office in Madras, (now Chennai), in Madras, (now Tamilnadu), and requested them to send me money by telegraphic money order immediately.

    I got the money the next day. In the meanwhile, I found all the hundred rupees notes hidden within the pages of a thick book, I had purchased from Wheelers at Bangalore railway station. I remembered everything. How silly of me? By this time, the friend had left for another town.

    I had a feeling of guilt that I suspected him. How come that we do not or can not trust people? How come that trusting people is so complex? It feels meaningless when we say ' innocent until proven guilty. I had already made the culprit.

    This feeling of guilt still pricks me even after 56 years and during this whole period, Bangalore has become Bangaluru, Mysore, Karnataka, Madras, Chennai, and Madras, Tamilnadu. What if I had directly charged him? On the hind side, had he not already left, I think I could have told him everything when I found the money but I am not sure.

    Could have asked for forgiveness, at least. Again not sure.
     
    satchitananda, Thyagarajan and Rihana like this.
    Loading...

  2. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    10,960
    Likes Received:
    26,597
    Trophy Points:
    540
    Gender:
    Female
    Interesting question. I am leaning towards the idea -- confessing to that person that you suspected him of stealing the money would lighten your mental burden. But becoming aware of the matter would make him feel worse.

    IMO, seeking such forgiveness borders on selfishness. Any time we put another person in a delicate or tough spot that is avoidable, it is not fair to them. What often happens is that the "confessor" looks like the "better" person and the other person looks bad if he doesn't match the confessor's "good" behavior.
     
    satchitananda and HariLakhera like this.
  3. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,202
    Likes Received:
    4,135
    Trophy Points:
    338
    Gender:
    Male
    Suspicion is not that bad a thing. It keeps you alert and you don't become complacent. Accepting people with a pinch of salt is a pretty good idea. There is no need to feel guilt or shame about it. As for keeping things safe, my father used to say if you can't find something you need, that means it is "very safe" I would say "too safe" if you can't find it when you need it. When I travel I don't keep all my money in one place, so that even if some are lost or stolen, the rest remains safe.
     
    HariLakhera likes this.
  4. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    7,293
    Likes Received:
    7,609
    Trophy Points:
    470
    Gender:
    Male
    :hello: Dear @HariLakhera ji,
    As I read your above write up, I felt am behind an invisible curtain. The feeling of guilt, the wrong suspicion, the repentance, the nagging effect at the back of mind all gets dissolved once You journaled it here or told elsewhere. Your heart is off the load now and turned light I believe. Narration sound and your query would be shuttled among fellow IL’ites.

    Spouse left her bangles beneath pillow that was on the “rajai”*over which our family was sleeping. It was spread on floor of the hall. Weather was murky. Our estimation of time by day light was haywire. It was already
    8 O’ Clock. It was a chaotic get up and spouse & I rushed through work while my daughter of five was asleep.
    Our one week old lanky domestic help arrived with her toddler and a girl of five. They were playing in a corner around my daughter. She half asleep joined in their play.
    Subsequently the maid speaking only Telugu , rolled up the rajai and with pillows kept them in a corner bench. She finished the work. Her kids were given milk and biscuits. She had tea and with a smile went away.

    Around nine spouse was seen fidgety. She said her pair of golden pair bangles lost and suspected the maid & her girl. I told her not to be hasty and search thoroughly. She said it was done already and compelled me to scoot her to hamlet. We do know maid was staying in a nearby hamlet. With daughter standing over in my front, spouse behind, rushed in lambretta in search of maid. We met her when she was busy with hearth.

    Maid Nagamma denied. We were in dilemma. The crowd in the neighbourhood supporting her began suspecting us trying to frame the helpless maid.

    We returned home wondering whether to lodge police complaint. It was getting late for both of us to rush to office. Now my daughter understood the backdrop of this scene.

    It was then, my daughter opened the shutters on tv cabinet cum showcase and picked up the missing golden bangles. She said she only removed from underneath pillow when no one was in the hall except kids of Nagamma.

    Spouse desired to make amends. She & I rushed to our maid but for some unknown reasons she vacated the place perhaps fearing that she might be harassed when we make police complaint.

    Few years gone by. We saw with her grown up kids. Nagamma cheerfully enquired about our daughter and boy. She did not ask us about bangles. Spouse only expressed tearfully her mistake in suspecting them in haste. When we offered her to domestic work with good salary, she declined politely because that she is employed now with State Bank Of India in our colony!

    There is another incident in which a lodge mate - a o box working for a popular Kerala based chit company collected Saturday by afternoon huge funds that he could not deposit in the bank. When the moneystuffed in his pillow was missing, He suspected other lodge mates. Police came and made enquires to inmates & lodge manager. During those days there was no CCTV OR MOBILE PHONES. But police detective person resolved the case brilliantly and nabbed the culprit. ...... I shall keep it suspense. Until then let it .....

    Thanks and Regards.
     
    HariLakhera likes this.
  5. Mistt

    Mistt IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    1,784
    Likes Received:
    5,530
    Trophy Points:
    435
    Gender:
    Female
    Sometimes we trust people just like that and sometimes we don't. You don't need to feel guilt because you thought it was safe to not to trust that unknown person. Trusting some one at some extent is good but it depends on situations and that person.

    It is unworthy to tell your distrust thoughts towards him and it definitely makes that person hurt. You didn't reveal your mind to him and you didn't do any harm. So, Let that incident go,Hari Ji.
     
    HariLakhera likes this.
  6. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,579
    Likes Received:
    1,723
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Male
    Asking for forgiveness is never wrong. The person asking for forgiveness is only unburdening himself. The other person may or may not forget but asking for it is the only thing a person can do for anything done wrong.
     
  7. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,579
    Likes Received:
    1,723
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Male
    Yes, prevention is always better than cure. I used to do the same while travelling. It is also a good idea not to share room with a stranger. Fortunately, I never had the need to stay in a dorm but people do stay in rooms shared by three or four people.
    In this case, we developed instant liking for each other and both represented good companies. But that does not made either the most hones person on earth. That si the reason I hid the money in the book.
     
  8. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,579
    Likes Received:
    1,723
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Male

    There are some incidence in life, forgetting them is difficult and mocks us.
    In households, servants are first suspects, possibly because many of them have been involved in such activities. At the same time there are servants in the households for years and never ever touched anything without asking.
     
    Thyagarajan likes this.
  9. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,579
    Likes Received:
    1,723
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Male

    It is a very old incident and does not burden me anymore except when similar incidence happen in households and the servants are suspected without any logic. There was a case of a son stealing money from his dad's purse and everytime the maid was suspected and removed. One day the son was caught red handed. But the damage had been done.
     
    Thyagarajan likes this.
  10. Mistt

    Mistt IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    1,784
    Likes Received:
    5,530
    Trophy Points:
    435
    Gender:
    Female
    Yes, that kind of incidents make me upset. They just consider other person's financial status, forget that they have also ethics and trust their loved ones so blindly.
     
    HariLakhera and Thyagarajan like this.

Share This Page