Good Friend

I guess people born on dates 4, 13, 22, 31 are invariably find they hardly able to convert acquaintances into strong friendship. I hv several bosom friends whose date of birth fall on any date in a calendar. It could be becaz i am born under sun sign number one.
I would suggest a read of numerology by Cheiro would throw up solutions and remedies for your plight of not finding long lasting friends.

 

You have actually echoed my thoughts…

Since childhood I was never interested in drama or gossips or following up latest fashion or grooming or not much girly discussion’s. In general also never had friend whom I can say best friend.

In my life time I could only soulfully accept and connect with 2 people. Unfortunately, one is no more and other is my ex, with whom I can’t be in touch.

Have good friends in boys and brothers but things changed once they are married, can’t call whenever I want or they busy with their life too and it’s completely understandable. And we won’t able to share specific things or things related to in-laws or don’t understand little emotional things related to hubby etc from a girl stand point which I don’t want to share to my parents and make them worry.

Sometimes I feel lonely, because I really want to have someone to freely share what ever going during bad and during tough times.

Friends(girls) are there but mostly busy with their regular schedule with house work, job and even due to time differences not able to connect to old friends.

Because DH very quiet enjoys my company only when I’m happy, active but doesn’t seem to care when in low, doesn’t listen on top of it irritates me even more. His nature makes me think twice before inviting anyone or others don’t easily consider inviting us as family.

Overall I’m friendly but cannot become too close easily. Like how easily I can share happy things, can’t share the unhappy moments. May be I fear they might judge be and treat me differently. If I become close and if they don’t treat me well at any point of time. I can’t take it. I wonder how few people who are not so welcoming or are very quiet too, whom I think can’t have friends also have close friends. This really makes me question what I’m missing.. or how to get one. What are the things important for lifetime friendships?

 

U got to be more of an extrovert. Trust begets trust. It is not necessary u got to be on same wavelength as your friend to be. Extend Helping hand as and when it is necessary. Dont be looking for reciprocation. Believe every other person in some way would be helpful if not now but in yhr long run. Be genuine in your amiship. Never talk ill of another person to your friend. If others talk ill of a third person do not encourage and deflect the conversation to some other subject. Dont try to befriend enemies enemy! Be kind and generous to all including their pets. Never tell your woes to new friends. Share personal issues only with bosom friends who emphatise with you and suggest solutions. Believe in enlarging friends' circle & try learn as much positives as possible from friends. But sound advise seem to be *not to be too close with neighbours*
God Bless.

 

If am not wrong..maybe you are in abroad.This is quite a common problem.Even I faced that..
But now I have many hobbies to
Keep me occupied.

Some things I understood:

1) We seek out friendships like school days or college days.It won’t always happen

2) People are busy or they have their own circle.

4) All those people in big groups..many might have smaller groups within that circle.One can have an amicable relationship with others but we cannot be best or even good friend to everyone.Groups also comes with lot of drama and stress.

5) We need to be clear on what we want.I think maybe u could be am ambivert.Extroverts find it easy to make friends without non attachments and introverts don’t care.Ambiverts need people that too according to certain standards which is not wrong and also boundaries.

6) I am happy with acquaintances now coz I don’t have the mental or physical energy to maintain friendships and if it happens organically great else also okay.

All these are completely my opinions and not generalizing it.

 

That’s right. Im thinking that might be one of the reason. May be I’m expecting people to be too nice/ perfect and behave same in all situations. If I keep so many filters and barriers may be it is difficult to find one or there would be no one as such. Even with genuine ones, because situations place a role, or they might be in a good mood to react certain way all the time, people change/ grow with time and we might see change in their behavior. Which not certainly be towards us but in general.

 

Feels like the suggestion is coming from lot of experience. That’s right, I second the thought of people might be helpful one or the other way. Now I’m thinking at least to have cordial relation with everyone.

Haha, thanks for the extra pro tip at last

 

Thanks for giving other perspective as well. Yes, there are much community people around and hence these thoughts. May if I have too may people around I will be worrying about groups and etc… surely, these suggestions are helpful!

 

Friends - you have to carful and check before make one and its easy to END any friendship... But the tough part is MAINTAINING friendship..
I have friends who demands my time and i try my level best to give time but still iam in loss