Funny (i bet ure gonna like dis)

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Arunarc, Mar 11, 2008.

  1. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    VERY IMPORTANT : ok enjoy this English , but dont forget yours in the bargain![​IMG]








    In Tamilnadu , there is a well known person by name , Mr. Jeppier
    , Chairman of Sathyabama deemed university and some more self financing colleges. He always speaks in English. The students of that college have collected & published a book by name "Jappier's Spoken English" <WBR>
    ... Njoy ...........with his..............English......<WBR>........
    <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR>

    Now , here are some classic English sentences from the great
    "Jappier's Spoken English" <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> # At the ground: <WBR>
    <WBR> ----------------- <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    All of you stand in a straight circle. <WBR>
    There is no wind in the balloon. <WBR> <WBR>
    The girl with the mirror please comes her...{Means: girl with specs
    please come here).
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> # To a boy , angrily: <WBR>
    <WBR> --------------------- <WBR>
    I talk , he talk , why you middle middle talk?
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    # While punishing students: <WBR>
    <WBR> ----------------------- <WBR>
    You , rotate the ground four times... <WBR>
    You , go and understand the tree... <WBR>
    You three of you stand together separately. <WBR>
    Why are you late - say YES or NO .....(?) <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    # While addressing students about Dress Code: (he is very strict
    abt this )
    <WBR> ----------------------- <WBR>
    Every body should wear dress to college
    <WBR> Boys no proplum <WBR>
    Girls are pig proplum . (pig=big) <WBR>
    Girls should wear only slawar no nightee. <WBR>
    Girls should not wear T shirt , U shirt , V shirt.. but if you want to
    wear .... remove it when inside the campus and put it outside the
    campus.
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> # Sir at his best: <WBR>
    <WBR> --------------- <WBR>
    Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance , he happened
    to see one of our boys at the theatre , though the boy did not see
    them. So the next day at school... (to that boy) - "Yesterday I
    saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema Theatre" <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    # Sir at his best inside the Class room:
    ------------------------------<WBR>---------------- <WBR>
    Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come
    in.
    Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come
    in.
    Cut an apple into two halves - I will take the bigger
    half.
    Shhh...Quiet , boys...the principal JUST PASSED AWAY in the
    corridor
    You , meet me behind the class. (Meaning AFTER the
    class..)
    This one is cool >> "Both of u three get out of the
    class."
    Close the doors of the windows please. I have winter in my
    nose today...
    Take Copper Wire of any metal; especially of
    Silver.....
    Take 5 cm wire of any length.... <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    Last but not the least, some Jeppiar experiences ...
    <WBR> <WBR>
    Once Sir had come late to a college function , by the time he reached, the function had begun. So he went to the dais and said, "sorry I am late, because on the way my car hit 2 muttons" (Meaning goats). <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    At Sathyabama college day- 2002: <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    "This college very strict. U no worry.... U get good marks , I the
    happy, tomorrow u get good job , jpr the happy , tomorrow u marry..... I the
    enjoy"
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    <WBR> <WBR>
    At St. Josephs college of engineering freshers day- 2003:
    <WBR> <WBR>
    "No ragging this college. Anybody rag, we arrest police "
    <WBR> <WBR>


     
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  2. padmavathi m

    padmavathi m Silver IL'ite

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    dear arunarc,

    Big LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig Laugh,

    so, his english is like this................i forgot what to type my english coming like JPR..................................Big Laugh................the students are very sad

    love
    padma
     
  3. Sumeru

    Sumeru New IL'ite

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    I forgot my english after this !!!
     

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