Feeling dejected

before a divorce, talk to him again for once more. ask him to schedule an apmt with you to talk.. switch off mobiles, laptops and talk.. if he still doesnt get you, give an ultimatum that you would like to go back for a while and try to start afresh after a break..
I would like to suggest one thing here and thats not to try for a baby now. Do you really want this sort of a dad for your child too, ie a person who has no time for the child too? You are definitely going to be a single mom to the child for all things concerned even if you are with him..
So talk, discuss, try different methods, resolve this issue atleast to an extent where both of you have a compromise and then think about a kid.
If hes like this for sex now, i am pretty sure you will have a post much later telling about theres absolutely nil intimacy between you both after the kid is born..
Yep, i agree this post is pretty negative sounding, but seriously i felt you need to shake up things now before adding a new member... Good luck..

 

Hey there,

In a different way, I kind of know how you feel. If you want, you can read the thread I started "Is this married life" http://www.indusladies.com/forums/me-and-my-spouse/82737-is-this-married-life.html

Maybe you will get some answers from the replies that some of the ladies had written to me.

Take Care.

 

Hi

Dont worry...i am also sailing in the same boat...my hubby is always tired and will start snoring as soon as he falls asleep...he will mostly come late...if at all he comes early...he will say am very tired ...in this 1 year of marriage.. it is always my iniative ... sometimes ..i used to fight like a rowdy but stilll am waiting for him to change.....ours is a love marriage...:drowning


so dont worry...soon he will realize

 

Hello

I would ask you not to think of Kids now. First you need to set your life rgt and also be comfortable and bond with each other and then only go for kids. Having a baby is a very big responsibility and especially women will be drained out both emotionally and physically. You will have mood swings and someone needs to be there to pamper you and to have a happy pregnancy period bcz ultimately it will have its impact on the baby .

So please stop thinking about the baby until you set right your life. Iam sorry if iam being very frank.

Its high time you put your foot down and have a discussion with your DH. Tell him what you feel like and if he is not going to change, then you dont see any value in your relationship and that you are ready to end it.

First have the discussion with him and see if he is able to catch up with you and sensitive to what you speak. Look at how he will respond to your issues. Be open about all your feelings and tell him you are suffering silently because of his behaviour.

later only you can involve your parents.you need to bring out all your feelings and see how he responds. Ask him to decide whats improtant in life .

regards
Shobha

 

To the OP:

I think you need to have a straight talk session with your husband and be straight and blunt about your sexual wants and needs and him avoiding and ignoring you is not acceptable. Give him an ultimatum to change his ways and pay attention to you or you need to resort to other drastic measures. In my opinion, you should put the child experiment on hold till your marital sex life is regular and back to normal and your husband has shown change in paying attention to you. If you think you are not getting sex now, having a child will only make it worse and you are not some reproduction machine for him. You need to make all this very clear to him and issue an ultimatum to change his ways.
Taking time off and going to your parents etc will not work as he is not paying attention to you when you are right there so how do you expect him to come seeking for you when you are oceans away? I think you need to be very direct and blunt about this and have a straight dialogue with him or nothing will change, unfortunately. Wish you the best.