What do failure do? It make us down or raise our confidence. Michael Jordan said that I failed several times and that was the reason of my success. What does that mean? Do we need to fail first to succeed. Or more you fail more confident and strong you come out. Then why do one has a fear to fail. What does that change in our life. We dont feel comfortable sharing our failures but if we find something better then we share it with joy to everyone. Why we look down at person who has not achieved much in his life. That dig them into fear of losing and hence they dont even try something and when same failure comes to us we too get scared of sharing it. If one does not stop fighting then these can become their learning for upcoming fights. Or one can sit down and feel depressed of past shortcomings and stop fighting. If you failed it's a wound but if you dont fight back then it's an end of your life. I too have failed many times and still have not get any much success but I have not yet stopped fighting. How you all are dealing with it. Anyone if want to share their story of failure and how they came out of it then please do this to guide others to fight back. Thanks.
Failure is painful, but the real problem comes when we care too much what other people will think of us if we failed. Fear of others' opinion affects us like this -procastinate more due to fear, lack of confidence affects our performance and makes us impatient for success and hence, spoils quality of our work. I have made my mind that I don't care to impress others. Society's pressure just makes us take wrong decisions.We have to do things in proper pace and time, and always be ready to change when required.It requires calm thinking. Insecure people try to feel good by putting down others.We should never get involved in the business of impressing others with our success. True happiness comes from truly enjoying our work and sincerely making efforts. Many times that can lead to external success also- that's what i think they mean it's pillar to success, because our early failure completely remove our fear of impressing society after we have faced the worst. Learning never goes to waste anyway so we should never stop irrespective of external success.
Thanks for the reply. Yes the society's pressure is right. When one not so successful person talks about his failures it becomes a poor story but the same stories if he tells after getting huge success becomes an inspirational story and everyone learn from that. I think it doesn't matter what you speak but your position matters a lot.
Absolutely correct.Many people only give respect for position and power so it's not worth to impress fake people. We should be honest, but no need to unnecessarily tell our (failure or even success)story to people. Every person has infinite potential but society usually fails to see it and sometimes they speak negatively due to their own intention to demoralise..
Failure is already discounted for in the grand scheme of evolution. When that big picture had put me down here to deal with it, an occasional mishap here or there isn't going to matter at all. I can even look at the demotivation powerpoint presentations (that someone sent to me) and have a laugh. One of the slides in that presentation captioned "MISTAKES" says in the byline: ... the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others.
@messedup Dear M, Once again you have come up with a thread that calls for a detailed response but I will try not to bore you. "Zindagi Ek sangharsh hai" Everyone's path and struggles are different and it is futile to compare ourselves with others. Failure helps to keep us grounded and it strengthens our resolve. Failure gives us the invaluable experience and helps to better our effort the next time. A person who has seen failure before success generally tends to be humble and sympathetic towards others. While a person who gets easy success, may turn out to be over confident and arrogant. He may have less reserves in him when failure hits him. These are the generalised thoughts and of course there are no hard and fast rules. Variations always exist. Failure is the stepping stone to success or try try try again etc are motivational quotes that help the strugglers to keep their spirits high and achieve success. At the end of the day, all have their fair share of successes and failures; everything depends on our outlook and maturity. Karma theory helps to accept life as it comes. कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन । मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भुर्मा ते संगोऽस्त्वकर्मणि ॥ You have a right to perform your prescribed duty, but you are not entitled to the fruits of action. Never consider yourself to be the cause of the results of your activities, and never be attached to not doing your duty. - Bhagavad Gita, Chapter II, Verse 47
Thanks for the reply. Your reply is as always superb. You can explain everything and anything. Karm karte jao fal ki icha mat karo. Well Said.
Generally our people wants “success” stories because that’s the miracle they want for themselves. So ‘not successful’ person talking about his failure doesn’t interest them because he didn’t succeed at the end of the day, it maybe more suitable for someone looking to survive rather than succeed, as they generally want someone to lookup to, to follow, someone to show the ‘right’ path to ‘success’. N when I mean succeed, it could be anything (n not limited to) like power, money, fame or even goals like sports people winning something or charity / social workers helping / saving someone, etc. Like eg, a friend helping a few specially able get decent jobs is a success too. It basically means achieving their ‘target’. Even a ‘happy’ family is a success goal.
Why we look down on failures ? Maybe it’s because of the way we have been raised, imagine, from school time, our parents pushes us to succeed, we get yellings, beatings, punishments, etc if we fail a simple test at school. It’s pushed n pushed inside our head about how we just ‘cannot’ fail. N that it’s a shame to fail. N we may have heard our own parents shaming some cousin / neighbor kid about falling short n the same parents compares us to that kid n shames us when / if we fail. N the same parents goes around boasting to all the people about the success when we succeed n hide n taunt us when we fail. All this grew with us from school to college to work n money n even to marriage n children. One example, my friends kid, talented, participates in everything at school, but she’s terrified of failures although she hasn’t failed in anythng. It reached to a level where her mother got so scared of her fierceness to win n later realized that she was pressurised by her granma to succeed (as she was majorly raised by her) n she had to approach a child psychiatrist to help the situation because she was scared that her daughter might just crash if she even fails at one little thing as she can’t handle failures or simply just doesn’t know how. It maybe an extreme case, but not everyone can deny that we didn’t grow up with pressure to grow, live (from school to our kids) n succeed in a ‘certain’ way n that we can’t fail. Now as a mother myself, I insist on not ‘fail-shaming’ my child, I keep telling that success n failures are part of life n that both are ok.. but it’s more important to keep trying n don’t give up.
It is better to have a mind set to accept both. Consider both as two sides of the same coin. But never ever give up. I always felt that doing your job with 100% dedication and sincerity will be rewarded one day if not now. I have faced both. I also teach my kids to take both in similar way. When we fail, accept it, calm down, try to understand the reasons, correct it and try again. When we succeed, stay grounded. Be optimistic and positive.
