1. Have an Interesting Snippet to Share : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Would you like to join the IL team? See open jobs!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. What can you teach someone online? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice
  4. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

Exceptional Children

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by lakshmi13, Feb 19, 2012.

  1. lakshmi13

    lakshmi13 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    121
    Likes Received:
    311
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    [JUSTIFY] I am just back from an Education seminar. Topic for my presentation was Educating Exceptional Children. When I sat down to make the powerpoint version, I realised that the topic had more depth than what was visible.. Actually, every child is a born genius but it is we adults who make them average... imagine the plight of the child who does everything to please his/ her parents but meets criticism and discontentment!!!

    In today's competitive world parents spend more time finding out what other kids know than what their child is capable of doing. Parents compete with each other to ensure that the children excel in academics by engaging as many tutors as possible without realising that all tutors force their ideas on the child, thus leaving no scope for creativity. Parents also take pride in getting their child enrolled in various extracurricular activities such as painting classes, tennis, swimming. But then they dont even check if the child is comfortable going there.

    How many parents were toppers throughout?How many parents attend hobby classes after working hours or during holidays? Only exceptions. Why then do parents thrust their ideas, thoughts, dreams onto their children..why, why, why???

    In the race towards success and recognition, parents forget that they are firing from the shoulder of their exceptional child, putting so much pressure on him/ her that the exceptionality is erased and they are left to fend for themselves as mere children.

    Lets get together to protect these exceptional Children - YOURS, MINE, OURS!!!! [/JUSTIFY]
     
    Loading...

  2. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,455
    Likes Received:
    20,251
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    Thank you for your wonderful blog. I agree with you that we need to stop the madness living our ambitions through our children. They have come to existence with a special skill that we need to help them find. Even if we are not helpful, we should not get them bogged down by so much we thrust on them. Allow them to develop their left hemisphere of their brain as opposed to the right remembering everything that we would like them to do and the lessons we would like them to learn.

    Viswa
     
  3. mums

    mums Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,217
    Likes Received:
    4,373
    Trophy Points:
    290
    Gender:
    Female
    Excellent one dear.

    I loved the above quote. It was a mind opener..........

    Every parents should read this blog.

    I feel pity with the kids who run from school to tuition class with heavy gunny bags.....from their to music class.....reach home by 9pm.
     
  4. celltech

    celltech New IL'ite

    Messages:
    65
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    8
    Gender:
    Male
    Thank you for that advice
     
  5. lakshmi13

    lakshmi13 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    121
    Likes Received:
    311
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Viswamitra,
    Loved this statement of yours.. Wish parents understood !!!
     
  6. lakshmi13

    lakshmi13 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    121
    Likes Received:
    311
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    You are welcome...Please use every opportunity to tell parents not to pressurize their children
     
  7. sreemanavaneeth

    sreemanavaneeth Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    741
    Likes Received:
    361
    Trophy Points:
    140
    Gender:
    Female
    hai Lakshmi,

    Well said. Ambition should not be forced to our children. Ambition to be found out
    from the children and from that parents should advise their children to take the best which will really fetch a very good result to their children.Tooo much of pressure and continuous compulsion will spoil the children ambition and will be confused how to be a successful person in the world itself. Tks for sharing such a wonderful thought my dear Il.
     
  8. Induslady

    Induslady Administrator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    6,344
    Likes Received:
    3,478
    Trophy Points:
    355
    Gender:
    Female
    Lakshmi,

    That was a wonderful blog about how and why not to pressurize children. Leave them to grow into exceptional children, how they would grow into if left to grow with what they originally possess. I also read the comments your blog received so far and looks like most of them agree to what you said.

    While, I too agree that many of us parents are forcing our kids into the "rat race" in life, put a lot of pressure on them both in academics and extra curricular, I want to be a devil's advocate here and raise a few questions. It is just to make few parents like me more clear on what they should be doing.

    So should we not encourage our kids to do more better, if they are already doing good? If a kids comes with "exemplary" in 3 subjects out of 5, should we not say try and put more effort in the other 2 too, so that you excel in them too? Should we not try their talents and interests in various extra curricular activities? Unless we try them on a few how will we identify or let themselves identify what they are good at and what they could perceive for perfection?

    Where do we draw the line? To say "great, keep it up" and "good, do more better"?

    PS: I have a 5 1/2 year old. When I see her sleep in the night after a full-day's hard work, I feel like "Oh...my little one is doing a lot for her age". But at the same time when I sit with her for her homework and she makes a mistake, or forgets something, I am not able to take it!!

    Regards,
    Malathy
     
  9. lakshmi13

    lakshmi13 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    121
    Likes Received:
    311
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Malathy,

    You are definitely not the devil's advocate because all your questions are what each parent is supposed to ask himself/ herself.

    I am sure you'll agree that there is a major difference in asking a child to do better and forcing a child to do better. When a child is asked to do better, not only is the child made to feel that his/ her efforts are acknowledged, it makes the child understand that his/ her parents are confident of better performance; this enhances the self esteem. But the sad state of affairs is that instead of praising a child for doing well in certain areas, the concentration of the parents is on the weak areas; this lowers the self esteem of the child. Besides, there are children who perform exceptionally well in extracurricular activities, but lag behind in few academic subjects. Their parents leave no stone unturned to ensure that the maximum time of the child is spent in academics only. However, in case of children who excel in academics but are way behind in sports, their parents have nothing to say. The point I want to emphasize is that parents are oriented towards academics only. For parents, it is marks that is important not the child's development.

    To answer your second question I would quote "Jack of All Trades, Master of None". A child is born talented and provides enough proof by displaying the same in the first two years, but the sad part is that the parents do not have time to notice it. For example, a child with musical talents would start humming a song she/ he likes, one with dance would move his/her body or its parts on hearing music, etc. Ideally speaking, parents should identify and start nurturing their child's talents within the first five years of age. How many parents do so? Enrolling a child for various extracurricular classes and expecting exemplary in all subjects is like making veg pulao out of pressure cooked rice or black forest cake in a steamer!!! Imagine having ten relatives at home, each with different needs and you having to cook ten different versions of breakfast, lunch and dinner all alone!!!! Any lady would break down after few days. So is the case with children.

    Each child has his/ her likes and dislikes. If they are pressurized to do things, they'll experience lot of stress. Why subject innocent children to the vicious circle of stress, fatigue and depression? Let children follow their heart. It is not necessary that their hobbies should match the parents' hobby.

    The problem with parents is that they keep saying "NO", "DONT" but rarely do they say " DO". It is easy to point out mistakes but good things done are seldom acknowledged. If a child picks up a glass on her/ his own and keeps it in the kitchen after meals but drops a bit of water on the way, the first reaction is "why did you drop the water?" Rarely is it heard "thank you for helping me. you did a great thing by keeping your glass back."

    There is a story, a caterpillar had gone inside a cocoon and after sometime, as butterfly was trying to come out of the cocoon. A man watching this went to help by breaking the cocoon to free the butterfly. With the cocoon broken easily, the man thought that the butterfly would fly. Sadly, since the butterfly was not allowed to break free and thus gather strength, the butterfly was not able to fly. children are like the caterpillar. They have to learn how to weave a cocoon, figure out alone as to how they can come out of it. The parents should only help by giving enough materials that children need for weaving their cocoon and protect their children from external dangers while they are in their cocoon and/ or trying to come out of it. Believe me, these free butterflies would be the most beautiful and strong ones who would never leave our sides.
     
  10. lakshmi13

    lakshmi13 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    121
    Likes Received:
    311
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Thanks a lot. You said it by acknowledging the importance of not putting pressure and compulsion on the children
     

Share This Page