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Evil Eyes... Is It Even True?

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by SGBV, Jun 29, 2022.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    I am not here to open up any debate on faith Vs Superstitions. Definitely not here to open a can of worms at this moment.

    This is purely to share my personal experience, as well as to enlighten others who may be sailing in the same boat as me.

    Here we go :-

    Many cultures believe that receiving an evil eye will cause misfortune. The evil eye is a curse believed to be cast by a malevolent glare, usually given to a person when they are unaware. It is believed to bring bad luck for the person at whom it is directed for reasons of envy or dislike.

    My mom used to perform certain rituals & prayers believing her attempts will protect us from evil eyes. When we were young, we used to tease at her, and never believed this kind of superstitions, that do not have a solid scientific backing.
    Regardless of mom's rituals, we had bad lucks in life ranging from mild fever to the death of a family member. But, none of us believed it was due to evil eyes. We took them all as part & parcel of living, and accepted what life threw at us.

    Of late, I have started wondering about evil eyes, and the negative effects in life due to the pattern in which I faced problems.
    In this regard, I've started doing a mini-research at personal level, and found out certain facts that corroborate to what our ancestors believed in. This is even cited in many religious scriptures and are believed in many developed cultures, including the Jews.

    The holy bible speaks about evil eyes as follows:-
    Matt 6:22-23 : “If, however, your Eye is Evil, your entire body will be full of darkness”
    Proverbs 23-6 :Eat thou not the bread of him that hath an evil eye, neither desire thou his dainty meats.”
    The Hindu religion has its own ways of warding evil eyes, including drishti pariharams, Nazar etc.. They play an important role in Hindu rituals.
    Al-Quran has a special prayer dedicated for this, verse 51 and 52 of Al-Qalam (Q68:51-52) in the Quran. It is usually recited for protection from the evil eye.
    Many Jews say "bli ayin hara" (Hebrew, "without an evil eye") or "ken eina hara" or "keynahora" (Yiddish, "no evil eye") when referencing something positive that has happened. Their holy book Torah speaks a lot about this matter.

    But who are those evil eyes? We interact with many people, share our happiness with plenty. And the world is now becoming a small village and it is impossible to lead a secretive life in this social media era.

    I am an active social media user. I have around 5K friends & many followers in FB & IG. I use tiktok and upload videos in Youtube too.
    I have been using FB since 2007, and the other apps since long.
    I used to post many things in social media, including the happy news, success, sadness etc..etc...
    People used to advice me to limit the information I share in FB, because not everyone is genuinely happy about your success. But, it never bothered me!

    Of late, I see a massive difference in my life. A pattern of falling sick or experiencing something very bad after every success/happiness I achieve.
    As advised by many, I stopped sharing my personal details in social media as a first step of prevention.
    But nothing changed.
    For the past 4-5 years, the story remains unchanged. That is, a sudden health issue or a serious family problem or a severe financial loss after each and every happy thing/success we experience.
    This is so real, as I have the evidence of dates, and details in chronological order to validate this.

    This is not the case when our life is stable. The problem is always after a success only.

    Although I stopped sharing in social media, I continued to talk to close family members & friends in real life as well as in whatsapp. This included sharing of family matters, success, plans & everything.
    This time, I started suspecting them and wanted to test this out.

    These are the people I can't hide anything from them.
    I mean, they are so close, and so connected to my family. Like my sister & family, brother & family, mom's brother & family, and my in laws (PILs, BILs & family) and few of my best friends & family.

    For the past 1 year or so, I started sharing my happiness with the extended family in batches. Of course in rotation.
    First I would tell the news to one set of family and wait for 1 week, and then share with the other. Again wait for 1 more week. Like wise, I did this religiously to find out the black sheep among us.

    You wouldn't believe what I've found out.

    Yes, each time we became sick or encountered a bad fight at home after sharing our happiness with Family X. Not just once, but many times!
    Sharing the same details with other family members, including with those who weren't at great terms didn't affect us.
    Surprisingly family X is one of the very closest family we have.

    For instance: I've got promoted, and that's something I've yearned for many years! So, obviously I was very happy. Our finance improved, we decided to make a big investment in Sri Lanka and this was shared with my close buddies in batches. Everything went well, until the message was revealed to family X as it was something unavoidable.
    Boom!!! That night itself I had a terrible stomach pain, got admitted in the hospital. After an abdominal scan, the doctors decided to perform hysterotomy and suspected cancer. For the next 2 weeks, the entire family was in pain, until the results came back negative. But the recovery was very bad.

    This is just once example of what we went through over the past 4-5 years since family X became "our" extended family.

    This may sound illogical, a superstition or whatever to those who have not experienced this kind of effects in their lives. I respect you for that, and wish you remain protected.

    I feel humbled for having been protected this far, despite of every bad thing that happened in my life. If it was not for God/the super power, I wouldn't be here explaining my encounters. Than God, we are out of the country now!

    Having said that, I urge you all to have a research at your level & be mindful when sharing your happiness with others.

    We always doubt some unknown fellow in social media can be harmful, but the culprit may sit next to you and do all the harm without your knowledge. Just be mindful.
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2022

  2. umaakumar

    umaakumar Finest Post Winner

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    Dear SGBV
    When things happen we believe. Like you at one point in life, I did not believe in this. But when I saw firsthand the effects, I started believing.
    I had a big fish tank in my living room. I had many large fish. Most of them grew in the tank. One day I had a visitor. He admired the fish so much. When I got up next morning, all the fish were dead.
    I knew it was the dhristi from that visitor.
    Thyagarajan, drdiva and SGBV like this.
  3. daisy1234

    daisy1234 Silver IL'ite

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    I completely agree with your last line. The same thing happened with me since the day one I got married. It took me 15 years to realize who the culprit was. Everytime we tried to go to the next step in life and there might be some tragic experience would happen to us!
    First year of marriage - We booked Europe honeymoon trip and our visa got into 221g and my hub wasn’t even able to travel back to US. Bought a new car and with in a week, major accident in our old car and I had to be bedridden for months! I got a new job immed after coming to US and with in 3 months, had to quit cos mom had a heart attack n had to attend her surgery. I stopped posting anything over social media and kept going busy with my life but these incidents never stopped. During my Graduation ceremony, we called none other than his brother’s family and same day my husband got injured and broke his new camera he bought to capture my special moments! We still didn’t get clue what was happening around us bcos we never had time to go back and re-examine things. I got pregnant with my first child right after grad school and I also started a new job and we only chose to share the good news
    with handful of people after 10 weeks. My parents and his parents and siblings. Same week miscarriage out of the blue. I was devastated! I started to think any step I take in life, there is something/someone who pushed me down to dark state. I had a beautiful baby born and next day they (his brother’s family) visited the baby and I had Bell’s palsy(facial paralysis) which took me months to recover! List goes on! These are not just normal things, each incident is worser than before! The moment I feel good about something and next day would turn disastrous. It made me think I should stop doing anything better than others! Like we didn’t want to upgrade our house, I didn’t want to get successful in my job! I quit and stayed home to satisfy his family. Literally I told myself, whatever I have currently is all we need and we should never try to accomplish anything big bcos somehow it’s affecting my loved ones very badly on top of monetary loss and health issues which came up randomly and put us in a state of despair! Even then I didn’t realize it was that one family which was the cause of all. It took us years to realize the jealousiness that creeped in their mind all these years and the happiness I genuinely shared with them had never been received in the same angle!

    SGBV - I highly recommend you to watch this serial - Navarasa in Netflix - one episode is between Delhi Ganesh and his nephew (Payasam) ! It opened my eyes literally! It talks about disgust and jealousy of an old man and the emotions were well portrayed by the lead actor.

    The lead character isn't only livid with his nephew but also is frustrated with his fate. His nephew Subbu, meanwhile, has had a great professional career, leading a stable personal life and is a content man at heart. Subbu becomes a mere outlet for Delhi Ganesh to vent out and direct his disgust and bitterness.

    Subbu's daughter is entering wedlock but the patriarch of the house is hardly happy for his nephew. He does his best to delay the inevitable and skip the wedding. Years of pent up frustration and insecurity heighten on the same day, so much that he doesn't mind admitting, 'I don't care what happens to me but I don't wish well for him. He will mess up the marriage feast voluntarily! You should watch this! I realized we are Subbu who always shared our happiness with our near and dear ones and our intentions were right
    but not everyone is happy with our success esp one we feel really close with! I always chose them as my first choice to share anythign I did in life not realizing they don’t the feel the same way about my success and that was directly affecting my life without my conscience. Yes Evil eyes are real and it also doesn’t affect everyone! Only chosen ones get into this evil eyes trap!

  4. lakshmi888

    lakshmi888 Silver IL'ite

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    No, it’s just superstition … mishaps happen to many people .. nothing new
  5. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

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    The negative vibes do exist.
    There is a family friend whenever he comes to ancestral house, either vehicles get repair, tv stops working after his visit - if we all cousins sit together and watching a movie he would come & say oh good family cousins are like friends next moment elders would want tv for soap, or cable connection goes off, one TV stopped working.
    on his next visit My grandpa told us switch off tv.
    I remember all electronics needed repair one by one. Radio, wall clock, tv, bike, scooter, dog won't eat, or kids get sick, falling down. After 1-2 days of his visit. My grandmother would hide new sarees, jewels in case we are just back from shopping. She would run to swami room to keep in a plate.

    My grandmother prepares excellent fryums, pickles. Once she told her big bottle of avakai (mangai) pickle broke after his family visit. My grandparents made sure any good news like job weddings they will share only via phone then give invite in person.
    He was envious, he had lots of land but eventually lost.

    Here in US there was neighbor, would say something, my other neighbor tires got flat after she said nice car. slowly other friends and neighbors observed this. She definitely had a way. Glad we moved out from there

    As elders say job, house, car, wedding and family way news should be shared only after certain period of time
    Thyagarajan likes this.
  6. nandinimithun

    nandinimithun IL Hall of Fame

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    Both good and bad co exist, sometimes when a person is extremely hurt, or in low phase of life the thought of drishti, sooniyam, astro comes to the mind. (which in my opinion is not right, i trust god and leave everything to god and do my work.

    There are people who are never happy with themselves and what they have in life, they constantly keep comparing themselves to others who are better than them. It is to see a person who has trekked and reached the peak of mountain and say, he is so lucky to be there, he gets to see the nice view, no one tries to understand the hardship kr the struggle behind that.

    There are some things which we do are harmless, like keeping a big kajal pottu on a baby's cheek/forehead or chin, to avoid the boori nazar.

    Dear @SGBV, everything exists when you give room for it to exist and allow it to grow.
    Do not let anyone or anything come close to you to hamper your peace of mind.
    One suggestion would be, before you break the good news to some people, dont show too much of excitement, tell it normally and before you say, just pray to god.

    You have struggled a lot and have reached a place where you are now, do not ruin that by others thoughts....

    Listen to positive podcasts, musics, allow sunlight into your home, open your heart to yourself, like a baby ask yourself, if today your food, clothing and sleep is taken care of, if not first do that.

    Next, write a letter to yourself, write all the things you love about yourself, if you get time, watch the beautiful sunrise.

    These are simple yet powerful things which changes most of the things for us. Ehen you reach a stage/phase where whag others think or vibe really doesn't matter to you anymore, is the time you have achieved your inner bliss or joy or whatever you want tou call it.

    I always wish you peace of mind, physical, mental and emotional strength. Continue to inspire and motivate people like me.

    Big hugs to you, incase i told anything wrong in my post, but my apologies....

    Thyagarajan and IniyaaSri like this.
  7. jayasala42

    jayasala42 IL Hall of Fame

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    Evil eye or Dhrishti is a very common belief prevalent

    throughout the world, specially in Asian countries.

    Especially in case of children the belief in Dhrishti

    is more often spoken.There is a black tika placed

    on the cheek or forehead of the baby, black thread

    worn on the waist of the baby,red and black small bangles

    adorn the cute little hands of the child.
    The probability of this evil eye or Dhrishti is all the more

    felt when parents post the photographs of children

    in face book, or when a performance of child in a

    show receives overwhelming response from the viewers.

    The mothers start of some procedures like throwing

    rock salt or burning red chillies with mustard and salt,

    or waving reddish aarthi.Apart from mantras various

    customary procedures during weddings, nalangu,

    oonjal etc,throwing coloured rice balls around the couple

    etc speak of our belief in this dhrishti culture.

    Flowering plants and fruit yielding trees,milk

    yielding cows and the concrete buildings also do not

    seem to escape from this dhrishti.
    The life force or the Prana, flows around us in the form
    of aura. There are four layers of aura that flow around our
    body; they are Physical aura, mental aura, emotional
    aura and spiritual aura. When the flow is blocked,
    disturbed or restricted by the negative energy,
    it causes ill-effects. This aura can be disturbed by the
    acceptance of the negative emotions and thoughts
    whether consciously or unconsciously.When people
    direct their negative thought patterns to us, invariably
    our physical aura attracts that negative energy and starts
    to attract negative happenings in our life.
    Dhristi is not a concept borrowed from superstitions,

    science explains it as the flow of negativity that affects

    the person or object towards which it is directed.

    The crow considers its younger one as the most

    beautiful creation in the entire world. So too mothers

    feel.Ultimately everyone is the mischief maker and

    everyone becomes a victim,one targeting the other.

    This concept of the evil eye also warns one against

    showing off and being proud. It teaches one to be

    humble and not take the spotlight and shine it too

    much on to oneself. The evil-eye concept trains

    one to acknowledge that there is a greater power

    which is operating through every individual and

    therefore, there is nothing ‘great’ about an individual

    per say. He/she is simply an instrument of that great

    power (God/ Atma/ Spirit/ Energy). This understanding

    also forms the basis of humility for what is there for

    one to feel proud about?
    In China the remedy for the evil eye is the Pa Kua mirror,

    a six-sided mirror that is hung on the front door or

    placed in the front window to reverse bad energy

    back to the sender. Some of these mirrors are

    convex to reflect back the bad “poison darts” or “arrows”

    of multiple ill wishers and some are concave to reflect

    energy in a definite direction back at, for instance,

    a nosy neighbor, whose gaze may have lingered

    on your garden of tulips for too long.
    In India the mirroring back of the evil eye takes

    the form of small mirrors that are sewn, braided

    or crocheted into clothing.
    My parents didn't believe in this concept.
    According to them there are certain people who find
    sadistic pleasure in lowering the esteem of others.In a cycle
    of events, good and bad, sometimes bad effects follow
    as a coincidence of the remarks passed by others.

    This belief is so strongly rooted that we tend to be
    very careful, not exhibiting our positive points.
    There is a tendency to become proud of one's own merits,
    God made or man made , and that is where they don't
    accept failures as part of life and try to attribute it to evil dhrishti.

    A child ,of its own hard work and merit, gets high
    scores and is openly appreciated in the class. Other children
    and their parents may get jealous, of course.But if the
    child continues to win, we are happy.But accidentally if
    the child gets fever or misses the top rank, we start
    suspecting the evil eyes.

    My mother born in 1900 never believed in evil eyes.
    She used to say the nazar or dhrishti is psychological
    and is an elated feeling about the beauty/achievements
    of ourselves and our own children.This conscious elated
    feeling when it gets crumbled due to any force, there is a
    tendency to shift the blame on evil dhrishti.If we are not
    very sensitive about our own merits, the feeling of 'evil eyes'
    may not arise at all.
    A tulsi plant may wither due to so many reasons.
    A person may fall ill due to so many facts.

    Feeling jealous or envious about other's victory is
    a common human nature and it is to some extent
    absolutely essential to kindle competitive spirit.

    If all the diseases or failures happen due to evil eye,
    those people would become sages whose words/dhrishti
    cast an evil spell.The fact that all problems have
    solutions either early or after a period, indicates
    that 'evil eye' is only a psychological impression
    of the winner about his/her own merits and
    perpetual thinking about one's own merits
    knowingly or unknowingly makes one indulge
    in such beliefs.This sometimes results in lack of
    efforts and one tends to attribute failures on others'
    evil dhrishti and not on his lack of sincere efforts.

    It is better to see reason behind our failures and

    try to rectify the defects on our side first rather than

    attributing it to evil dhrishti.Even Karmic theory does

    not seem to justify 'buree nazhar'.

    jayasala 42
    umaakumar and IniyaaSri like this.
  8. drdiva

    drdiva Silver IL'ite

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    I believe when someone is saying this after experiencing ..they cannot b wrong but at the same time i believe if you are an ardent follower of some positive energy..some deity or guru you are protected..Never encountered anything directly..but i asked my maid that such things happen..esp in case of kids she said yes she experienced that her kid became really sick..bcoz of that and i believe..
    In this world not everything can b backed by science as science is the creation of man and the god is creator of everything in this world. We are very small beings in comparison to this hniverse..so certain ghings we still have to know and certain things mayb we will never know
    KashmirFlower and IniyaaSri like this.
  9. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Oh.. yes!
    I can recall a similar thing happened at home back in 2018. We had a fish tank for years and many people used to admire it whenever they visit us or see the pictures in FB. Nothing happened.
    Then this person came. Doom... The next morning all the fishes in the tank died. That was the last time we had a fish tank at home.
    But we never thought it was related to evil eye then.

    I am so sorry to hear your encounters. It is tragic.
    I am sure you have found the strength to overcome these hurdles with positive energy. I can so well relate to what you have gone through.

    I am happy for you. Because this is exactly what I used to say all these years when other people talk about evil think. This is a very simple way to brush off things that do not matter to us.
    I wish & hope you remain protected all your life.

    You are right. Elders must be right too.
    My grand-parents always follow this. But my parents & us never bothered as we never trusted these things and always treated such rituals as superstitions.
    We have an open life, and we do share everything with everyone. Life went went though we had our share of problems otherwise. But for the past 4-5 years, it is a clear pattern of down time after each and every progress we make in life. And as per my research, it is always after sharing the happiness with one particular family.
  10. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Of course yes... Good & bad co-exist in this world. In fact, when good is 90%, we have around 10% of bad too.
    To make my point clear, this is the best phase of my life and I enjoy high time in my career, less problems in family life, more settled and more peace of mind. That's where I am able to analyze everything that had happened to me in the past decade where my life was no different from hell. I don't know how I survived, but I bounced back each time to reach heights whenever I struggled. It was because of the positivity I had in mind & the positive people who stood by me all the time.

    In life, I have seen mostly the positive & good people who wished me good from the bottom of their hearts, and did good to me & the family at many fronts. Because of them only I am here, successful & protected.
    I trust in God, and leave everything to him. That's where I get the peace of mind, and the energy to progress in life.
    In fact, if not for God, how on earth I will survive and be hale & hearty to be here.

    But this post is different. It is about the pattern of events, and the people involved in. It is about prevention & protection of my life and that of my family from known evils. It is about religious faith & scriptures and the cultures across the world (in fact, from the most intelligent groups of Jews included) that believe & follow.

    Once I thought, only uneducated people in their lowest time will talk about evils. But I was so naive then. With exposures to different cultures, I have started observing things from a different angle.

    That's important. But the pattern of failures and problems made me do a bit of a research here.

    2 years back, my son got a gold medal in grade 5 national examination, and it was a proud moment for all at home. He was the only Tamil student in the whole district to attain this; and an award ceremony was planned to honor the child. The chief guest was the governor, and we were super excited about this.
    But, a day before the ceremony, my son was down with Dengue fever, and got admitted in the hospital. With his conditions, no one at home even bothered about his success or the ceremony but fought for his life.
    We have lost that momentum. The excitement of such a success was taken away from us.

    My DD is an aspiring child artist. She does modeling too. She was only 7 last year, and received a couple of modeling opportunities which she acted. It was featured in the local media, social media and she looked super cure in them. We were overwhelmed about this, but within weeks she had a rare skin problem that eventually forced us to shave her hair. By the time we did that, she has got 4 other opportunities, but we had to move on with the treatment then. It was so heart-breaking for a child at that age, especially after being modeled & received appreciation for her cuteness. With bald head, she even struggled to go to school or meet friends that time. The family's happiness about the child's success was swept away in days.

    As I explained in my OP, each time I get promotion or an interesting offer or the family's progress such as buying a house, or a land or an investment..... we experience a serious down time, that completely takes away the happiness or the excitement of the success.

    This is the problem.... The failures or health-issues are common, and they can come at anytime. But why after each success? Why to take away the momentum before even we experience the happiness of the hard earned success?
    And especially, why after sharing the happiness with certain people? and not when we chose NOT to share anything with them.
    Can't brush them off as coincidence because they are many, and we have evidence based on chronological orders.
    And why to brush off these things as superstitions, when the science is yet to figure out this. But, many cultures, including those intellectuals tend to believe in them.

    As @daisy1234 mentioned, there was a time when we thought not to look for success, not even to try to progress but to settle with simple things in life. We tried to be secretive and not on social media for a while. But nothing helped. Now that, we are figuring out the evils amongst us, and trying to safeguard ourselves.

    Just because I haven't died yet, I can't say death is unreal.

    Most definitely. If not for God and the positivity in me, I wouldn't be here successful & happy in life. But I always believe prevention is better than cure.
    drdiva and Madhurima21 like this.

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