Do you know why 'no' to few things in our culture?

Friends,checking this thread after a long time.

when i think of ecchal and patthu, I think of this story.

once a guru was teaching the kids in the gurukulam. they were so engrossed, and suddenly there came a cat, which was roaming in the class disturbing them, the first day they tried to shoo it away but nothing happened, the class was disturbed. the second day, the cat came in, the guru asked the cat to be caught and tied inside a sack. the third day, the shishyas, saw the cat wandering around even before the guru came to the class, what did they do, they caught the cat and dumped into the sack.

time flies, this guru dies, another batch of shishyas and another guru takes the places in gurukulam, but they try to catch a cat and dump it into the sack and leave it in class, thinking it is a ritual that is a must before the class starts.

the same way, what would have started as a convenience for somebody, has now become a MUST in the name of rigid rules. We need to accept things that we can definitely do and forget the rest.

Incidently papaya was never eaten by brahmins, today my fruit seller says brahmins buy them in huge quantities..(I live in a condensed brahminical area), because of the wonderful properties, same for garlic. when we can accept things when we understand it is good forus, why not for other things too..

Uma, I think we discussed the kumkum sometime, don't remember where. but this is my reasoning. it has something to do with the chakras, the concentration. A bindi in between eyebrows, in the region of ajna chakra ( the pressure point for your pituitary glands). and the bindi worn were made from purest form of turmeric/sandalwood, with limestone and flowers and things that are all said to keep your body cool. this point is known to be a wisdom point too..(though i cannot prove this scientifically..but has been known to be a exit point for kundalini shakti, and the bindi keeps it from coming in contact with the external powers, whether positive or negative...this is something i have read while reading about the chakras..and kundalini shakthi..don't remember the book.). actually there is a loosely woven logic according to me. it should be that you don't go out after the pooja without any of the tilak/bindi. after your prayers, you are keeping those positive vibes within yourself, for the whole day. remember prayers were offered first thing in the morning..all this was done so systematically:bowdown.

Latha, regarding bells, those days bells were more for the temples and not at home. temple bells were too heavy to be handled by ladies, so somebody would have said that it should be rung by the menfolk, and we follow this as it is at home..does n't this follow my above said story..:rotfl.

No intentions of hurting any sentiments, but if somebody has a actual reason that can be justified i am all ears..

 

my mother was very strict about all sorts of little rules like this and i used to ask why, she would just start screaming at me and making me feel guilty and i'd just be like okok :bowdown

i'd like to point out though that while many of them do have logical reasoning behind them (thanks Shanthi for all your extensive posts) that may or may not be applicable to today's world; I think its more about establishing obedience in children than anything else, and teaching them about their inherited culture and way of life. Every culture and society have rules and most of them make no sense or seem rather silly but we all follow them, right?

anyways thanks for the replies I can understand some of them now.

 

Friends,

Can somebody tell me the Do's and Dont's during the 13 days period after a death of a person,who is closely associated to us.DH is doing the last rituals for his maternal grand mother and I would be supporting him in all the rituals by standing next to him.

Would want to know all the Do's and Don'ts during this period.

Thanks in advance.:hiya

 

This is an excellent thread.. Thanks for all of you for all your valuable answers. It answered lot of my questions..

I have some questions too...

Some says that we should not give money to others after 6pm or during fridays. Any reason for this?

In which side of the husband a wife should stand while getting the blessings.. some says left and some says right. And what is the reason behind that?

Regards,
Sowndari

 

youngnrestless, I know what you mean. i still cannot eat betel leaves for fear of some cow coming to take a hit at me or not doing well in studies..though the combination of betel leaves /calcium/nuts is considered aphrodisiac and our elders did not want the kids to try it.:rotfl:biglaugh.and they put the fear in us in a different way..and we followed it blindly without asking questions....fastforward 30 years, now my son will not just accept it blindly, i have to give reasons and explanations for the same.

just sharing what i understood...you are welcome and am happy if you are able to accept the reasoning behind those no's.

RG, I am sure by now you would have got the replies. my keyboard flunked and could not reply immediately.
since it is the gm and maternal, people will definitely say that there is not much in the don't list. but I believe, the soul stays with us the 13 days and departs on the 13th day, so following atleast few of them is a respect to the soul.

no shaving or combing.
earlier days they did not take luxurious bathing in the sense no soap, they would have been using besan/flour preparations which were a no no and today lot of people do not use soap the 13 days.
no new clothes in the 13 days. (I think that the clothes had to be wet, and new clothes did have starch that would be irritating..)
wearing kumkum/bindi or not is according to your family.
no poojas. it is said that the poojas done are received by the soul during the period of mourning.

Sowndari,

this is a really invigorating thread isn't it.

money, it is not just us, even russians have this superstitions about not giving money in the evening or counting money in the dark. I believe in those days with no electricity and also it was coins, and there is chance of doing some mistakes while counting. this is the reason i can think of.
I also think since friday's was considered auspicious and also people used to visit temples, maybe it was a way of controlling spending..:idea

regarding right/left arguments continue. I think while taking blessing we are supposed to stand right of your husband and one sastrigal told us that the husband is the moon and the wife is the sun and the moon always gets energy from the sun.:cheers.

I prefer the left side otherwise..

 

Thanks shanthi....

 

why is it said not to do any constructions when women is pregnant?
my home is almost ready but we wanted a small pent house too..gurhapravesam(house wamring) is already done.
we are planning to go to new home once baby is born so i wish all construction work is done by then but my in laws and mom are saying construction work should nt be done now...any logic behind this
shanti please help

 

Thanks a lot Shanthi for being there:thumbsup

I want to know few things.

Why there is a restriction to visit beauty salons in the evening?Any specific reason?

 

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and i will still follow the same. if it is extension of your own home, i will say wait till your baby is atleast 6 months. these days babies also are susceptible to dust allergies easily.

 

RG, actually applying logic and reasoning to these NO really is challenging and i am enjoying a lot..

i think it should be something related to pieces of hair being stuck to your dresses and body and getting scattered when you come home..??
other thing could be any reactions, or problems are best tackled when it is daylight or the morning rather than the evening.. (we try to introduce new food to a baby in the morning rather than evening for the same reason.)