Do u want to laugh to death.........

Nice Ones……. Relax for some time… ……

1
Sardar: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train.
Friend: Y?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y did'nt u Xchnged?
Sardar : oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower Berth..

2
Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at night, nobody will b there.............
Girl goes at night & really nobody was there

3
A SARDAR went 2 a BANK to open a S.B. A/C. After seeing the Form He had gone to DELHI for filling up. U knows y?
FORM said " FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".

4
A sardar invested 2 Lakhs in a business and Suffered huge Loss.
Do u know what the business was? . . . . .
He opened a Saloon in Punjab!.

5
A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.

6
Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?

7
Sardar had twins; he named them Tin Martin.
Again had twins & named Peter & Repeater.
Again twins & named Max & Climax.
Again d same. disgusted Sardar named them TIRED & RETIRED!

8
19 Sardars went 4 a film. On asking them y they came in a big group of 19? They replied that the film was
only for above 18...

9
A sardharji photographer focusing a dead body's face in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives beat him why?
He said "SMILE PLEASE"

10
Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".

11
Sardar gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out, climbs tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks why he does this.
Sardar :"I've been promoted as branch manager."

12
Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth................. WHY?
because his doctor advised him "Todays dinner should be light" ;-)

13
Sardarji was filling up application form for a job.
He was not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary Expected".
After much thought he wrote : Yes!

14
Sardar & family go 2 a party.
He introduces himself – I Sardar, she Sardarnee,
The boy my kid & the girl my kidney....

15
One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U know Why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...

 

16
Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It"s already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.

17
"Santa! Your daughter has died!"
Depressed, Sardar jumps from 100th floor
At 50th floor he remembers I don't have a daughter!
At 25flr:I'm unmarried!
At 10flr:I'm Banta not Santa

18
On a romantic date sardars girl friend asks him, darling on our engagement will u give me a ring?
He said ya sure whats your phone number?
19
Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever - What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.

20
A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have an Aircel phone but still Hutch network is following me.

21
Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket.
Dealer gave 11 cr after deducting tax.
Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.!

22
A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except one Sardarji. He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

23
Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted it....

24
What does a sardar do after taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.

25
Sardar proposed a Girl......Girl said 'I'm 1yr elder to you'...........
Sardar said 'Oye No Problem Soniye,I'll marry you NEXT YEAR.

26
Why cant sardars dial nine-eleven (911) at emergency?
** They can not find the eleven on the phone.

27
Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says... Drink quickly......
Wife asks why...
Sardar says hot coffee Rs.5 and cold coffee Rs.10

28
A Sardar & his wife filed an application 4 Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide, U have 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! We"ll apply NEXT YEAR

29
Sardar's wish :when I die, I wanna die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the car he was driving..

30
Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
31
Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.

32
Sardar news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in Punjab. Local Sardars have so far found 500
bodies and are still digging for more..

33
A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in the morning.
Sardarji replied "Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM".

34
Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital. Man says CHIN YU YAN and dies.
Sardar goes 2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words.
It is 'U R STANDNG ON OXYGEN TUBE!"
35
Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing ?
He said-I am seeing how I look while sleeping.:2thumbsup:

 

thanx to Mohana & suni.

 

thanx to all:-D