Do pregnant women really get attention?

Dear GodsChild,

I do feel your frustrations - and hope you'll manage to put aside others reactions and make yourself happy.

I am five months pregnant too - and luckily am healthy and active. I don't particularly enjoy attention or pampering (other than from my sweetheart) so actually am quite relived that no one goes out of their way to treat me like I'm different.

On the buses, I find lots of other people who need the seat more than me - old people, people who've worked all day, large-size people who find it difficult to balance themselves standing - and maybe I'm able to take this generous view because, as I mentioned earlier I am quite fit and active.

I do sometimes wish someone would give me a seat, but I don't think it's fair - honestly, everyone on that bus has had an exhausting day - and just because I am pregnant or choose to travel by bus in this condition - I don't think I have a right to demand a seat.

But that's just the way I think.

I try to manage the best I can - and people actually notice and offer their seat - which I do accept gratefully.

Don't let other's reactions affect your state of mental peace or happiness. Do your best for yourself - and expect only from yourself. You'll honestly become more strong and happy - and people around you will mellow too - and may actually surprise you with their generosity.

Take care. Be strong. Stay happy. And have a lovely pregnancy!

 

Hi GC, interesting topic!.

I remember cribbing endlessly about how I am not being taken care off!. For many of us living far away from India and our family members, there's a different set of challenges. With on one around but your DH, things can be a tad tough. Preggie women desire loads of attention and justly so. With our shooting hormones and body changes , we often do turn into someone else:spin. My DH goes out of his way to help but sometimes I miss my family not being around. Its often not physical help but an emotional support that you desire.

Regarding how others treat you, I totally agree with

Unless you start giving yourself importance and the attention that your pregnant body needs , no one else will understand. I know its really sad when other women ( sometimes your own relatives) fail to see what it's like to be pregnant :rant.:rant. But just ignore them, even if they are close relatives, such people will never change!

Regarding friends, I am blessed with a good set of nice people but the one's who dont have kids have no idea what being preggie is all about :rotfl. So I decided to make some pregnant friends and that really helps!

Last but not the least , this forum is for all of us to get some emotional pampering .
Continue writing in and Happy pregnancy!

Deepa

 

Yes GC, it was an Indian lady (I cant even call her a doctor, she isnt qualified to be one). We expect these people to be a little compassionate, even if they dont pamper us.. But just imagine being shouted at the most pitiful moment in my life... :rant But I have moved on a long way, learned how to give such people a royal ignore.. After all, it is our child and it is we who need to pamper ourselves!!

Well-said Deepa, :bowdownthis forum gives a lot of emotional pampering, esp when we stay far from home and need it the most..

 

Hi Godschild

Congradulations on your pregnancy!!!!!! and Nice thread

When i was pregnant...i dint have any problems or not even a single issue i had faced from my DH,parents and In-laws ...are were/are very sweet...i was wonderfully taken care...

But all problems came in the form of autowalas, the bus drivers and the passengers..To reach my office, i had to reach the railway station.cross the bridge and take the bus to my office..Before my prognanyc I usually take the shortcuts which are bumppy and not so gud..but durin my pregnancy, i dint want to take risks and hence will my 6th month ,i used to go to the railway station in my 2 wheeler and then park there,cross the bridge and take the bus.

My tummy was shown from my 4-5th month..but till 7 months nobody in the bus, be it the old people or the young had never offered me a seat inspite of seeing my face damn tried and my inability to stand...no, all used to turn there faces as if they dint see me.even if i ask,they used to give a look as if i had asked a share in their property..very very few times maybe 4-5 times till month 6,i was offered a seat.. and there were also times where drunken men who used to sit next to me...most horrible of all..

Once when i boarded the bus, i saw a young lady sitting on the seat and i was about to take the window seat...she sat next to the window seat..that two-seeter had a pole next to it...she saw i was pregnant,and moved only her body...i dint know how to get in,there was a pole next to the seat..either she should have moved inside taking the window seat or get up and leave place so that i can go inside..she did nothing rather than just moving a bit bringing her legs sideways..i was really shocked to see a lady doin this to a pregnant lady...

One more incident that often comes to my mind during pregnancy..during my 4th month,when i was crossing the railway bridge after a tiring day, i vomitted on the steps...and i was not able to manage myself...it was a busy day and lot of people were crossing the bridge and some of them even noticed that i had vomitted and was not well...but not even a single soul came and helped, not even a single drop of water did someone offer...i recovered myself after 5-10 min and went back..such heartless people..

Other than this , with auto walas...that was really tough...i constantly used to tell them to go slow...they go slow for a little distance and then show their driving skill by drinving fast..i used to tell my hubby ,in case i take an auto during my 9th month,my hubby need not spend a penny for my delivery...i would deliver on road within minutes...

 

So sorry to hear you all suffering. I am almoost end of 6th month. And in USA because I live in downtown I use public transport. The people are very nice on the bus/train. There are few times when no1 gets up for me. But if on that day I feel I cannot manage standing I ask for a seat & people give seat with a smile feeling ashamed of not giving seat before.

You ladies need to stand up for yourself and not be so timid and demand seat. Pregnantt ladies need seat more than normal men & women even at the end of the day.

 

Hi Ladies,

I thought i m only sad soul who is not getting attention during pregnancy.

The day i got pregnant ILs were so eagerly waiting for me to go my mom's place. Though they showed they were happy. But i know they think i m just a bag who will carry their grandson ( big no to girl tsk)

Neighbours have good update on my health and weeks i m in. ILs dont even know which week i m into, what complication i have, ladies around here give me tips on many things.

Strangers are real sweet heart. Offer chairs whereever i go. stop their vehicles for me. ask their kids to move aside, and what not.

Mom-dad and sisters care take of me alot.