My co-sis is a near perfect DIL and she wants to show she is better than me. She could cook well for a large number of people, overtaken my performance level in the organization I work for in competition with me, does everything her husband and MIL asks her to do and works 10-12 hrs a day, doesn't go out alone, they don't eat out or have pizzas or burgers. A goody goody person. I like eating out ( not too much ), I would like to work limitedly. I read novels. Dont know how to make a rangoli. For my DH, cosis and SIL are the ideal women and he married me assuming I will be like my co-sis. Nothing is secret with my DH, he reports everything to my MIL and she reports everything to BIL and SIL families. If I do something - they show they can do better. My cosis deliberately baits me by commenting slyly about what my DH reports- mostly the whole family deliberately put me down.If they do well - its good for them. What works for someone does not work for others. We live in same apartment and DH,BIL,Cosis and me work for same organization. Nowdays I tend to avoid them. I visit on special occasions but I cant go to their house and this upsets my DH a lot and has caused a lot of problems between DH and me. If they drink warm water we must drink warm water and it goes on and on for everything. I am over weight and started exercising and immediately my co-sis started and lost weight too. My DH is not smart like his brother and neither is he hard working but that does not stop him from comparing. My BIL and me are in same position, co-sis is one step lower and DH a few steps down. I am getting nightmares about my BIL and Co-sis getting promotion. Want to take it in a humorous way but failing miserably. Five years of married life, I get upset and inevitably take it out on DH. It gets reported and the cycle goes on. Now even their children point out my mistakes, look down at me. I am projected as a lazy,headstrong person who doesn't respect them. I am also stubborn and I do things in my own way. Don't mind a good suggestion from others but I can't accept and do what they say. My MIL and SIL complain about me to everybody and there were a few occasions were people who work for my SIL start advising me in an indirect or insulting way. I can't change DH, can't change them - but I want to stand my ground without becoming angry or continuously ruminating on what upsets me. Its affecting my career also. Any suggestions please. I started pranayama, a friend suggested counselling.