Comparison - Does it hurt relationship ?

I couldn't help replying to yr post padmappg.

Why are you forgetting her sister in this whole equation? You are blinded by jealousy right now (which in a way means that you still love your wife btw), hence her threatening to leave you and stay with her sister...you are translating as her wanting to stay with her BIL.

Is it sooo hard for you to understand that since she is talking with her sister every day, that means she is much emotionally closer to her than her brother???

Maybe she keeps telling you about what her BIL did, in a misguided attempt to tell you what she wants from you. I really don't think she is having any affair with her BIL. As others in this thread have said, comparison is just a harsh way of telling somebody how they would like you to behave.

Your wife might just be sharing information also..not trying to do any comparison per se...however if you don't like talking about her BIL, then tell her (calmly and peacefully), that if there is anything she would like you to do, to tell you straight and you would do it..but to please put a stop to all this comparison business, because you are not liking it one bit. After all this if she brings up the topic of her BIL, keep QUIET and DO NOT say anything. Change the subject and ask if she wants to go out...

Just a suggestion - this weekend, take a break from all this fighting and go out and have a family lunch together some where..go for a movie maybe after that..but spend some time together as a family..your kids always see you fighting viciously...let them see a softer side as well...who knows, you might even enjoy your outing...

take care,
Aarushi