Can Marriage Be Purely Platonic?

I previously had vaginismus symptoms with my husband. This happened before pregnancy and worsened during and after. In my case, the problems on our marriage (disrespect, controlling behavior, etc) all contributed in making sex uncomfortable and unappealing. I tried numbing gels to help, but the problem was mental, not physical. The pain or anticipation of pain made it less appealing to have sex. Something changed physically for me, I don’t know if it’s meditating or working through my acceptance of my sexuality. I tried to work on self love and connecting with my body- there are a few books that can help with that (Living An orgasmic life by xanet pailet).

in my case, my husband and I divorced (not for sexual reasons, but it contributed as a factor). But interestingly, post separation, I began loving myself and when I started dating a new man, who I felt connected with, I found that sex could be pleasant and pleasurable.

So, the point I wanted to drive is, vaginismus is not the end of the relationship. If you take effort yo work on yourself and your relationship with your body, you can learn to let go of whatever is preventing sex from happening. And there will be a day when you will feel safe with your partner.

Good luck to all the women who have experienced similar challenges.

 

IMO, the main difference between a friendship and spouse partnership is intimacy and partnership/companionship. If there is no sex, it’s really difficult and I’m speaking from my own experience.

I’ve heard of ladies who had the same issue as yours and overcame it with help from trained professionals and have healthy sex lifes. I suggest you try that, even online options are available now.