Black or White

Dinny · Jan 16, 2013

I once saw a debate in TV regarding daughter in laws and the criteria on the basis of which daughter in laws are selected.So there was this lady who was talking on how we should change our mentality,the daughter in law may be ugly or dark in complexion but that should not effect the way we love her.the debate heated up more and after some time the anchor asked this same lady if she would choose a dark or not so good looking daughter in law for her son.And the answer was a flat NO.

(Now now i dont want you to think that dark and ugly are synonymous...but trust me there lot of people out there who think fair means beautiful...what i have quoted here is what i heard on TV..this is not my opinion)

Tell me ILites how many of you would really go for a good looking/financially well off /same caste or religion daughter in law.i want you to be frank and give me reasons on why you would do so).
I am just being realistic here...i know many of you will say 'i will leave the decision on my son'but how many of you can guarantee that your decision will remain the same when your son grows up...be practical...i am not saying that our kids will marry according to our likes/dislikes.Here i want to know the qualities that you would like in your DILs.
I have seen many aunties and uncles who used to say "i will be OK with my son's choice' and finally when their sons decided to get married to girl of their own choice...then began the fights first with the son and then later with DIL.either its the caste(higher /lower), financial status or looks of the girl which are issues.One look at the matrimonial section of newspaers will tell you what i mean
i want you to give me some realistic answers..give me one or two things that you might like or not like in your would be DIL

what say ILites?? give me your opinion on this(just for fun)
lets see how different we can be from our mom in laws

Maggie2009 · Jan 16, 2013

Why should her looks matter to me unless am planning to marry her myself ?

SGBV · Jan 16, 2013

I am a mom, but my son is too young for marriage (just 2 yrs old now ha ha). The girl, her looks, her financial situation, education, character and all matters for my son, and not for me. After all, I am not going to share my life with her, it's my son. I can not see the DIL through my son's eyes, so I will leave this to him.

Only one thing that I will be more concerned about is, my son's age and maturity level when it comes to choosing a partner.

mirambika123 · Jan 16, 2013

She must be friendly to you and your family.That is the most important thing that matters.Complexion and the looks are superficial matters.What matters most is the potentiality to accept others in your life.

Dinny · Jan 16, 2013

Right Maggie2009
You are right looks dont matter

Dinny · Jan 16, 2013

Yes SGBV
The choice of DIL depends on our sons...

Ragini25 · Jan 16, 2013

The guy and girl are gonna get married. Let them decide what looks or what else works out for them. Simple.

ars · Jan 16, 2013

me too. I would leave the choice to my sons.
Only thing i am praying for I wil get D'sIL not S'sIL:hide:

dsmenon · Jan 16, 2013

I dont have any kids now.. When/If i have a son i would first want him to marry a GIRL - how she looks/ whats her status would matter only after that...

On a more serious note - i would leave it to him.. after all its his life...

lukywife · Jan 16, 2013

Who are we to decide his life partner? Its his/her life and its up to him. We cannot look for someone who likes me or my family. she is not going to marry me/my family. They both should love each other. She can be younger/elder, its upto him. I should learn to shut up.
I cared a damn for apprearance while choosing my partner. Even my relatives told not to choose him and they called him as not so good looking so they all told he is not at all a match for me. But you know what...My husband seem to the most handsomest person in my eyes because he is such a broadminded guy and he never let others interfere and most importantly he has spine. In my eyes, a person seem to be beautiful when they are non interfering.Simple.

dinny said: ↑

I once saw a debate in TV regarding daughter in laws and the criteria on the basis of which daughter in laws are selected.So there was this lady who was talking on how we should change our mentality,the daughter in law may be ugly or dark in complexion but that should not effect the way we love her.the debate heated up more and after some time the anchor asked this same lady if she would choose a dark or not so good looking daughter in law for her son.And the answer was a flat NO.

Tell me ILites how many of you would really go for a good looking daughter in law( i want you to be frank and give me reasons on why you would do so).

I have a son(too young for marriage right now).I dont want to be a typical mom in law.I will definitely not ask for dowry BUT i dont want my son to marry anyone who is not of our financial level ,the girl should not be below or above our financial level.I dont like both the situations.
Religion and place of origin is no issue.But the girl should know how to respect other religions too.I like religious people.I strongly feel that religion brings in lot of discipline in our lives but no religion is above the other.
Complexion of girl...hmmm ...i dont care...i would want someone who loves my family ...

what say ILites?? give me your opinion on this(just for fun)
lets see how different we can be from our mom in laws
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