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Birthday Party Invitation

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by raji2678, Aug 27, 2022.

  1. raji2678

    raji2678 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi ladies..
    I have a query.if you have a small child of 7 years and are celebrating her birthday in a grand way...with around 20 kids and 20 adults..by booking a small party hall and arranging for caterer
    Would you invite the children of your domestic help.. society security guard..school bus cleaner to the party as well.also ladies please share your past experience irrespective of your decision
     
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    If it is a kids only birthday party where all parents drop off the children and do not stay on for the party, I would invite the children of the domestic help etc.

    Children are more willing and able to play with "less privileged" children. A child who is behaving badly can be corrected.

    Both the "privileged" and "less privileged" adults will find it awkward to socialize with each other. I would avoid this mixing in a birthday party so as to not hurt the feelings of the poorer adults and so the birthday boy/girl's special day is not messed up.

    Birthday parties where adults are invited are not the best time to bring about social change. Diwali, Xmas festival or new year celebrations are better times for this rich/poor mixing to be started and practiced.
     
  3. raji2678

    raji2678 Gold IL'ite

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    Thanks for your inputs
     
  4. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    You have a kind heart.The very thought of thinking of less privileged kids shows what a nice person u are.

    However as other posters said don’t mix coz it might create a complex.Instead give those kids goody bags and cake after u get home through their parents.They will feel happy.

    Else just call only the kids and no parents.Even then it is advisable just to go with the peers Instead of unneeded complexities.
     
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  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    My notes here would be on a tangent.
    I was relaxing and my son in law from downstairs phoned up to join with spouse in a party. He said we are given 1800 seconds to get ready and show up. I asked him what party it is to which he said “ it is surprise”

    We saw in downstairs hall , a decent decoration and a 2kg chocolate cake with all other accessories centrally placed over a dressed up table . Upon seeing me with spouse, A dozen members that includes my sambandhis around in chorous singing “Happy birth day to You” .
    I was plesantly surprised when i came to know a while later that sponsor was Gomathi - the cook and her family.

    To celebrate my birth day Cook Gomathi took initiative - arrived with her grown up daughters and son & her hubby with a 2kg. Cake with candles and a bursting cracker.
     

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  6. raji2678

    raji2678 Gold IL'ite

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    Nice..thanks for sharing your perspective
     
  7. raji2678

    raji2678 Gold IL'ite

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    Waiting for others to respond
     
  8. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Yes. I always have.

    They don’t come. I used to wait and wonder. Even my mom was wondering because she also invited them. Maybe they are uncomfortable in that setting. I didn’t think of having an alternate small event at home but that would have probably been better for them.
     
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  9. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    I have always invited the children/grand children of our maid & driver. There were occasions when my kids were transported to the school in a tuktuk and they really bonded with that tuktuk driver - calling him auto mama. So, I've invited him & his kids for one such party during that period.


    Experiences differ based on your choices.

    We have always treated our maid as a family member. The maid came from a not-so-poor family, and was reasonably educated.
    Sometimes, she would bring her children along, and my children would play together with hers during those times. They are usually clean, well-mannered kids. They go to school & behave good.
    We usually get them dresses or shoes depending on their requirements while inviting them. Also, we always share the onetime used expensive cloths of my children with the maid/driver or any under privileged kids. Often they wear such cloths, and were able to mingle with other children without any problems.
    In fact, kids are kids..... and when it comes to play, they are together no matter what.
    Especially my DD bonds so well with the little child of my maid, and never leaves her hand :)

    But, to be honest with you....
    We have a lady who comes home just for cleaning, and she never enters inside of our house. She cleans the outside and she hails from a very poor slum area. I never thought of inviting her to the house party, given the differences. But I have always made sure to give her food, and gifts after the party.
     
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  10. 1Sandhya

    1Sandhya Platinum IL'ite

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    Why are you asking? What is the thinking behind your question? Why do you want to invite them? Is it because your daughter is good friends with them and wants to invite them herself and you are unsure if it’s the right thing to do? Or is it your strong wish to invite them and teach your daughter and her peers something (and daughter doesn’t really have an opinion about it?) What’s really in your mind? What is your intention here?

    What is correct thing to do depends on what answer you provide to above questions.
     
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