1. Would you like to join the IL team? See open jobs!
    Dismiss Notice
  2. What can you teach someone online? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

Bhai Ka Resume

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by veenaissack123, Jul 17, 2007.

  1. veenaissack123

    veenaissack123 Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    19
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    Bhai Ka Resume

    Pappu Bhai Supariwala

    Objective:
    To obtain a challenging position as a Crime Implementation Analyst (CIA)

    Education:
    * B.S. (Crime Technology) Tihar India, August 1984
    * M.S. (Criminal Sciences) Virginia Prison for International
    Smugglers and the Unlawful Activists(VPISUA), August 1986.

    Thesis:
    "On escaping from high security prisons like Alcatraz with minimal efforts"

    Coursework:
    Cop Psychology, Plastic Explosives Technology, Bomb Controls and Timer
    Device Theory, International Smuggling and Drug Trafficking, Object
    Oriented Crime Design

    Work Experience:
    * Research Assistant, LTTE Labs,Jaffna, Aug 1990-Aug 1991
    * Worked on the prestigious Belt Bomb project
    * Developed instant death cyanide capsules in orange, strawberry; and
    mint flavors (Patent# 007,13,666)

    Summer Internship:
    Dawood Ibrahim and Haji Mastan Associates, Bombay, June1987-July1990
    * Worked as a hitman and was responsible for many supari style killings
    * Participated in election rigging in Bihar and made hafta Collections

    Honors & Achievements:
    * Won 1980 Gabbar Singh Memorial Award (given to child prodigies in crime)
    * Member, IPKF (Indian Professional Killers Forum) student chapter
    * Performer of the year in 2004 General Elections in Bihar & U.P.
    * Strong hold on Govt. & NGOs.
    * Specialized in extortion,illegal construction business & fake
    academic degree supply.

    References:
    * Dr. Charles Sobhraj, Full Time Prof., Tihar Jail, New Delhi
    * Dr. Chandra Swamy, Visiting Faculty Tihar Jail, New Delhi
    * Dr. Dawood Ibrahim, Overseas Projects Manager, Dubai
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 24, 2012
    Loading...

  2. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,595
    Likes Received:
    2,781
    Trophy Points:
    445
    Gender:
    Female
    cyanide capsules too in different falours...hahaha
    ooops what a resume of a bhai, mind blowing.......
     

Share This Page