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Best And Worst Weddings You've Attended

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Amica, Oct 2, 2018.

  1. Amica

    Amica IL Hall of Fame

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    Tell us about the best and the worst weddings you've attended. What was so good/bad about them?

    This thread was inspired by @Amulet's post in @Rihana's thread.
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  2. Amica

    Amica IL Hall of Fame

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    At one of the first places I worked, we were a group of people who didn't socialize with each other at all. It was all business. Possibly because none of us expected to work there very long. One month in I didn't even know the names of my coworkers.

    Then a subordinate asked for a day off. For her wedding. It turned out the bride and groom were orphans raised by various relatives all of whom recommended a quick no-frills ceremony.

    For the first time ever, we came together as a group. The hat was passed around, funds collected and a "proper" wedding arranged. It was simple compared to weddings I have since attended yet it was the second best one I've ever been at. The bride was radiant, the groom adoring, and not one bruised ego at the ceremony.

    I can't think of a worst wedding offhand. So here's the "worst" thing I witnessed: The mother of the groom cut and served the wedding cake. The bride looked horrified, the groom nonplussed. And yes, it was a very extravagant Indian wedding.
    .
     
  3. MalStrom

    MalStrom Platinum IL'ite

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    The best wedding was that of one of my cousins. The bride's family went out of their way to make us all feel welcome, put us up at a nice hotel and assigned a person each to attend to all the men and women of the groom's party. And the food was out of this world. They had hired cooks from all over India to make specialities like rumali roti, biryanis etc. People still talk about it decades later.
    The worst one was a wedding in the extended family. We were invited through my grandmother and even my parents didn't know the family well. The father of the bride and mother of the groom got into a public screaming match before the muhurtham over some misunderstanding. The priest got fed up and said the marriage was going to proceed as long as the bride and groom were sitting on the dais. People still talk about that decades later, albeit differently.
     
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  4. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    Weddings are all uniquely different from one another. Not best or worst. Some are ordinary, and others, a little weird, perhaps. It is all based on our expectations.

    I have been to a few western weddings, because I had spent some time of my life in some western countries, and had made local friends. I had this jewish friend (her husband a college prof.) and known their family for some time. They invited us to their daughter’s wedding. She was marrying a goy. The wedding happened in a church, with a unitarian, female minister. It was early spring, and churches are always cold, because all the hot air goes way up high and sits near the ceiling, and at the pew-level we would all be shivering, and holding hands. The groom’s side and the bride’s side (we were on the bride’s side) sat on the two different sides of the aisle… as is the normal practice. The looks of the divided people was itself hilarious. Like Moses had divided the red sea, and got the chosen people to our side of the seatings.

    One of the disappointing aspects of western weddings is that it is all over faster than how long it took me to get ready that morning to come out to the event. Our weddings take a long time, with so much fire, smoke, chanting, yelling, children running about, people having misunderstandings, gossip about impending fracas in the store room of one or the other party….etc. etc. In western weddings, comparatively speaking, nothing happens. People are dressed like penguins…. in white or/and black. And many, in their new, unaccustomed shoes, walk like penguins too. The gossip is also pretty staid. One lady told me,”you send them to college to catch a wife… and you never know what they’d catch”. I assured her that our child was a fine catch, and the groom couldn’t have done any better. I investigated and found out later, that she was a paternal aunt of the groom.
     
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  5. HazelPup

    HazelPup Platinum IL'ite

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    I was hoping someone to say Best Wedding I attended - My own wedding ( self) :)

    And worst - My SIL s wedding where I was neglected or not respected
     
  6. poovai

    poovai Platinum IL'ite

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    Both good and not so good weddings, I attended here.

    More than 600 people attended the wedding / reception, it took place in a fancy hotel. For some reason, the extravagantly priced event took place in total silence. The groom's parents had that horrified look on their face. The cost ~250 -300k, spent by groom's parents. The south Indian married a Rajathani girl, held as a south Indian Hindu wedding. We were attending from the groom's side and felt very uncomfortable even during the reception after the wedding. The bride families were singing / dancing and the groom's side were the specters. Later we guessed that they are not too happy about their son's choice. The parents hardly ever visit their son, even though all are living in the same town; they have now 2-grand kids. Both parents are retired now (physicians) and shuttling back and forth to India, trying to fill their void in life. The young man is also a doctor and his wife is SHAM.

    It was held with only 50 people, a Christian wedding. The south Indian married a white girl. Beautifully arranged by the bride, herself; The wedding cost spent by bride and groom, cost was 80k. We were attending from the groom's side; the parents looked very happy and enjoyed with their group of friends. In a relaxed setting, the wedding took place in a downtown fancy hotel. Well orchestrated event, simple food, cocktail, dance and everyone enjoyed the night. The couple have now, 2-kids; the boy's parents bought him a upscale home and meet as a family once a month dinner, regularly.

    Both weddings took place nearly 10-12 years ago.

    Waiting for next set of wedding waves and that include my son's, as well.
     
    Last edited: Oct 3, 2018
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  7. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

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    Two weddings coming to mind for memorable for good reason: One was a Christian wedding of a Keralite friend. A long time ago. It was the first time I was at such a wedding in person. It was kind of solemn and if I recall correctly, it was the first time where the 'priest' explained the rituals and vows, words.
    Another was one that I attended a year or so ago. Saw in person what extravagant weddings are held in India now. The wedding venue (cannot call it "hall" by any measure) was like from the movies. Tall pillars reaching into the sky, flowing curtains, "palace" was the theme I am told, and red carpet that ran a long way. Huge palm trees, starlit summer sky. Yet understated too. The bride had been through what is called a 3 or 6 months "bridal package". The trainer takes charge of bride's diet and exercise. She looked glowing even before make-up. Food was also good (I didn't eat much... usual India trip restrictions of eating outside only in known restaurants). The bride's and groom's siblings, parents and close relatives were so happy, relaxed, and genuinely happy to see guests. Everything seemed to go nicely. It was a great experience for me. I came away with changed views about extravagant weddings. Photographer was a simple looking young guy wearing an unassuming 1980's style pant, shirt, yet so talented. He had the bride's friends sit in a group and look at each other, it was simply well done.

    Worst wedding.. not really any that comes to mind. Worst marriages, maybe. : ) One that we recall sadly is when there were some dharnas and protests in the city, and curfew was imposed on the wedding day. Not postpone able due to lack of good dates. Only near family could come. Lots of food went waste. The bride never got over being cheated out of a memorable wedding.
     
    Last edited: Oct 3, 2018
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  8. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Best wedding: It was our good friend’s wedding. He got married in US in a fancy hotel. The baarat consisted of 10 horses, the whole Hilton was booked for the wedding. The 3 day party was something I would never forget. It was like living in a dream. Everything was just right. The bride looked like she just might be the worlds most beautiful woman. My friend was so happy and everyone were very very happy. Food, drinks, snacks were flowing around ceaselessly and from mehendi to reception, it was flawless. The event managers I believe charged a lot but it showed the effort. They had a theme for every day.

    Worst wedding: My sisters. Her in-laws didn’t talk to my dad at all because the hotel he booked them in had only 6 AC rooms. Others were non-AC (we tried telling them trhat in this small town, this is the only hotel with AC rooms and all were booked for them). They were rude and the mandap, MIL was arguing with the priest about the order of the rituals. They had issues with decoration, food, everything. Mom lost 6 gold bangles, 80 thousand rupees and it was a nightmare.

    Everyone else said the wedding went perfect. She is in the process of getting divorced now after more than 15 years.

    I think if its an immediate family members wedding, the stress is more. Other times, when we are guests, we have the opportunity to sit and enjoy.
     
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2018
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  9. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    The good weddings are many, but I still remember two such weddings those stay very closer to my heart

    1) My cousins's wedding. Both the spouses are super rich, but as per the custom the bride's father (my uncle) wanted to give loads of dowry to the bride and groom in the name of gift. Both bride and groom did not make any fuss about it.
    The groom's family did say a word that they won't demand anything, but it is up to the bride and her family, as they wont interfere into their decisions either.
    It was a grand wedding. The beauty is that the grooms family and the bride's family and their extended families instantly became very closer to each other, like long term relatives.
    It seemed very nice to see each set was caring for each other, and staying together as one family without any ego.

    2) My best friend's wedding. A love marriage. A modern woman to a traditional guy.
    Both parents did not show much interest in this marriage, yet they did not disturb the pair either.
    The family stood there at the wedding hall, just as yet another guest. But it was the mutual friends, like us who were everything in that wedding.
    Every one took a responsibility, and ensured we delivered the best for the couple to start their new life.
    From printing invitation to renting a home to the couple, everything was arranged by friends. But it was a grand wedding.
    A stress free, happy wedding like in the movies. There was no rule, no tradition. We all just enjoyed that wedding at our own comfort, and happiness.

    Worst wedding:

    It was my BIL's wedding.
    An arranged marriage, and the bride is non other than MIL's cousin's DD.
    The expected dowry didn't apparently reached the groom before the wedding day, so the groom fussed and delayed coming to the wedding hall.
    Then there were series of pleasing from the bride's family, and finally groom came.
    Both bride and groom looked very serious and unhappy. Both parents acted as if they were enemies at the hall.
    Groom's family demanded respect, and bride's family offered them half heartedly and there were people who sided with each set, gossiping and trouble making through out the wedding function.

    In the evening, when bride's family arranged first night at a place, and had that place decorated as per the custom for the couple to enjoy, this groom and parents refuse to show up there.
    Groom left to his annex (a very messy bachelor's place) where he worked, and adamantly told he will not enter bride's place unless the promised dowry and other matters are cleared.
    But it seemed the bride's dad was in trouble, (again a crooked one, might have given fake promises, I don't know), and staged a drama before relatives.
    Then some common relatives came in for compromises, and groom agreed to bring the wife to his dirty/unorganized annex that night.
    So, bride's family rushed to change bride's saree for the first night make up, but she refused it and went there with a very sad face.
    I was there witnessing all this drama just as some outsider, because that's how my PILs treated me back then.
     
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  10. blackbeauty84

    blackbeauty84 IL Hall of Fame

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    Worst Wedding: When I got married for the first time. The arrangements were good but still my ex's family wasn't satisfied as there were mosquitoes in the wedding hall, kid from our side hit another kid in groom's side etc etc. My ex-MIL made a huge show at wedding lunch as my ex didn't sit next to her rather sat next me. It was a nightmare.

    Best wedding: When I married my DH. It was a closed knit ceremony with less than 20 people who were very close to us. Very less rituals. But no fuss, no dramas. One important thing is I met my PILs only on the day of marriage.
     
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