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Autism Kids Mom Can Help Me Pls

Discussion in 'Toddlers' started by Sweetygals, Jan 29, 2020.

  1. Sweetygals

    Sweetygals Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi,
    I have a 15 month old boy and 4.5 yrs girl. My 15 month old showing signs of social and communication delay.
    We took him to doctor in India, he referred to Psychiatrist and that doctor told us that he shows signs of autism. But cant be concluded as he is just 15 months old.
    If this persist till age of 2 we can perform the diagnosis of autism. He just gave some ideas how to interact and play with him. The therapy can start after 18 months if he shows no improvement after training him at home. And as i was working full time till now, taking a 6 months break in a months time.

    For now he lags in many things like:
    1. Does not respond to name.
    2. Only eye contact with family
    3. Neither does not point finger nor does not follow the finger where we point
    4. Mostly plays alone with a toy but not with wheels
    5. Flap his hands sometimes when he is super excited
    6. Does not follow commands.
    7. And he is not so much attached to me. Mostly he is attached to dad. But his job is very hectic. Only i can take a break now.

    He is a super active and claps his/ my hands if we sing clap song. This also came after long training only. Im super worried. No words to explain.
    What all u think i can do to improve him? Please give your suggestions.
     
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  2. sandhya2020

    sandhya2020 Bronze IL'ite

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    Maybe your child has autism but you should wait and watch and not jump to conclusions and worry. I really dont know much about this condition.Can only remember some things I have come across.

    Treat him with lot of patience, set regular routine for everything- make a loving encouraging atmosphere at home.Make him feel safe and routine life.Introduce new experiences slowly and patiently.If you are a at home, you can try getting a pet dog.They are very patient and really help the child. You can experiment with diet. We randomly hear someone benefitted by cutting out dairy etc. I don''t know the details- you have to look at the scientific literature and do your own research. Have faith and patience.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2020
  3. Laks09

    Laks09 Staff Member Finest Post Winner

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    @Sweetygals - My only regret to date is waiting and watching with my son. Early intervention is key. Friends at the therapy center with kids who started at 18 months got into typical kindergarten class. Since you already went to a psychiatrist and sort of have a diagnosis start on early intervention at the 18 months mark. They do parent train and you can be heavily involved in your son’s goals and training. If he ends up not having a diagnosis, great. The intervention is not harmful at all. It will help him alleviate his speech delay and catch up to typical peers. Even if he does have a diagnosis the early intervention is a leg up and can help him catch up.
    You can do the following at home while waiting for therapy to kick in -
    1) Cut out all devices. They harm more than they help especially in the younger age group.
    2) Play with him - big blocks, shape sorters, peek a boo, animal sounds games etc
    3) Sing for him. Sing rhymes completely for a week or two. Then, sing the first line and pause before the last word. Observe if he says something or makes a sound. I’d he does make an attempt, praise using the word he was meant to say and continue. Make him fill random words in the songs slowly.
    Eg: Jack and Jill went up the ((pause)). If he says hill or hi or looks at you and tries to mouth a word, say hill(very good). Continue the rhyme. For the next few days try pausing and different areas on the song. If he doesn’t, continue singing and try again in a few days.
    4) Traditional Indian rhymes with hand movements are really good. Try those and make him gesture. He might start if you do that on a daily basis.
    5) when you are giving him water say water or the equivalent before giving him. In a few weeks, see if he can say or start off on the beginning sound by bringing it to him but not giving it to him. You could do the same with other things. Label everything - sleep, food, dad, sister, grandparents etc. Point to each while labeling. See if he points instead of using the word. I still remember my little one who was newly diagnosed was having a huge tantrum at nap time. I had no clue what he wanted. I somehow calmed him down and asked him what he wants. He looked at me and gestured with his hands the spider from the Itsy bitsy spider. He wanted me to sing him to sleep. I used to use all the hand gestures for the rhymes. That was his first break through and we’ve come a long way from there. I didn’t do sign language because my son always had words and speech but I’ve seen moms use that as a precursor to speech and it helps a lot in gestures and speech development.

    Last but not the least, be kind to yourself and don’t beat yourself up. Begin the day by telling yourself you are doing your absolute best. Say that to spouse and both kids too. Especially the older child who will try to make up for the sibling who cannot by overdoing it. Don’t worry, everything will turn out ok.
     
  4. Laks09

    Laks09 Staff Member Finest Post Winner

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    Duplicate post.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2020
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  5. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Dont wait .
    Start occupational and speech therapy.
    Take him outdoors a lot.
    Laks has already given you great ideas on interaction.
    No screen time
     
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  6. Mehana

    Mehana Platinum IL'ite

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    1. Focus on his food. Are you giving him a balanced healthy food? Cut off all junk(biscuits, chocolates and sugar) foods. Try for 3 months and see how he's doing. Be strict on food plan. My son progressed much after 4-5 months when I stopped all his sugar and junk foods.

    2. Early intervention helps a lot..start speech therapy as soon as possible

    3. Work on more 1:1 program. Play audio rhymes and do more hand/oral actions

    4. Cut off electronic devices

    5. Work on his basic needs. If he is hungry ...use your hands to help him to point the food or work on sounds. Example: he likes apple, tell him 'aaapp'.

    6. Play more. Play doh , pretend play etc
     
  7. Sweetygals

    Sweetygals Bronze IL'ite

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    Thanks a lot for all your suggestions. @Laks09 I will try out each suggestion and update the progress well.
    Therapy doctors are saying that before 18 months in center much cant be taught. My kid is also fussy. He usually cries uncontrollably when he visits the crowded places. So even for diagnosis he did not cooperate much as hospital was crowded. Doctor took points from what i mentioned. So he said try it in your home. See if there is any impact . If not come back lets see what can be done.

    1. And also i need help in how to make him respond his name. I tried out rewarding methods. At least initially he will turn back if we call him thrice. Now absolutely he does not care if we utter his name. What to do.
    2. Mostly he plays on his own. How to break this.
    3. Also doctor said throw the bottles away. Use cups. If i give him any cup. Mostly he bang them or throw them. He is actually playing with it. Not taking it to mouth at all. And straw cups i see he does not know how to drink from straw. Actually straw cup i have been trying for a month. But no use. After trying for 1 hour i finally give up. And give him bottle.
    How to improve. What all strategies worked for u all?
     
    Last edited: Jan 30, 2020
  8. VLR

    VLR Silver IL'ite

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    Hi,
    My DD was diagnosed with autism at 2. She would not respond to her name, no eye contact, zero communication speech, would not point, won't indicate if she is thirsty or hungry, didn't understand potty training,had stranger anxiety and sensory issues. Would not interact with anyone and play alone.Even had self harming behaviour and hand flapping and spinning.
    Most of my points could be repition from Laks' post. If so please ignore.
    1) Early intervention really helped. It was 3.5 years when she first addressed me as amma and her dad as Appa.
    2) Be patient. Try to involve in his play. But don't direct or tell him how to play or correct him. Just play like how he does. Let him dictate the rules of the game. Follow his lead and refrain from correcting. Imitate all his actions. That gets their attention immediately. And improves eye contact.
    3) don't test him by asking what is this or that. He will get frustrated after a point. And stop responding. You try to tell him what the word is and leave it. For example if he points to milk don't force him to say the word verbally. Just say ' oh milk. Mama i want milk' and give it to him. Keep doing this and he will pick up gradually.
    4) kids need to trust us first. Don't push him to do things that he hates all at once. Do gradual transition and always give him with verbal assurances and hug saying it will be ok and you will be there always
    5) sing lot of action rhymes. if you sing tjem instead of tv or any other device the kid will start looking at your face. Sing rhymes with names of body parts, animal sounds, actions etc. Slowly he will start imitating the actions.
    6) zero screen time
    7) refrain from shouting or taking out your frustration on them. this is the most difficult part. remember whatever he is doing he is not doing it deliberately. they are under much greater stress than we can imagine.Imagine having a need like hunger and to not be able to communicate. He will be frustrated and resort to tantrums.so be patient.
    8) outdoor play is must. allow him to play in sand, water etc. let him get dirty and messy.
    9) play dough is very good. and so is pretend play.
    10) keep talking to him all the time. remember even if he is not responding he is listening. dont get disheartened by lack of verbal response.
    11) Get him to play with his sister a lot. Kids pick up from siblings a lot. My DD learnt most of her speech from her twin brother. Earlier she wouldn't even acknowledge him. But now they are inseparable.
    lastly take care of yourself. This will test your patience and resilience the most. keep telling yourself you and your son will get there.
    celebrate small successes. Ignore all the snide remarks and judgemental statements from others. Remember your kid will be the real fighter in this battle. We are only helping him. He needs all love and affection.
    My DD is now 5. Still goes to therapy. But she has caught up with her peers on almost everything. She started talking in single words only at 4. Now she is able to cope up in mainstream school. Do you know she won first place in speech competition in her school among 60 kids. and the speech was her own one. She didn't want me to write it for her. her english skills are of 6.5 or 7 years kids. My real battle was won the day I stopped asking 'why me or my kid' and i accepted her condition as a challenge for both of us.

    So dont worry. Initial months will be tough. But you will get through.
     
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  9. VLR

    VLR Silver IL'ite

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    For name call response, here is what I did.try to put a chart of family tree with all family members photographs. I had this photo cube with photos of all family members on each side. Each time we will roll the dice and say the name of the person. Also during pretend play give a name to all toys and address them by their name during the game. My DD was 3.5 when she finally understood the concept of names and that everyone has a name. Keep practicing and they will get it. Play games where turn taking is involved and keep saying everyone s name during each time.

    Stop the bottle feed one at a time. Get him a cup with his favourite character or color and see if he can drink evening milk in that. You have your evening tea along with him. Then gradually transition to other times. Bottle is a sense of comfort for them. They will get anxious if you start changing too many things at the same time. Do It gradually and allow him time to get adjusted.
     
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  10. sln

    sln Finest Post Winner

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