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'Attending' Problems

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Agatha83, Mar 20, 2016.

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Mar 25, 2016 #21

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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shobhamma said: ↑

Dear @Agatha83 and @Viswamitra
It is indeed distressing, but this is true everywhere.

Where are the trained people? No one wants to be trained in geriatric care. Everyone is looking for office or media jobs. Even if they don't get them, no matter. This kind of jobs are beneath their dignity.

My mother was bedridden for 4 years. My brother and bhabhi were lucky to find a woman living with them full time. She herself was diabetic, but took good care of my mother. But it is rare.

Some of my friends hired nurses from hospitals , which were more expensive but effective.
re @jayasala42
The attenders clean the patients only twice at 8A, M and 8 P. M.Intermediary urine/bowel excretions are left uncleaned.What a pity!

This attendent problem is there in the homes too. I have worked with one home and know the trouble we had . Cleaning twice was barely possible.

As I see there is a big divide , here is a crying need for trained help which is just not available but IMHO some resources are available if someone with initiative can tap :

1. If an organization can take up training , there are Vrindavan widows who simply go begging and chanting and get barely enough to live.

2. Then there are jailbirds , people of both sexes who do not get a decent job again because of some felony. I am not talking about the rapists and murderers , but there are many other lesser crimes which brand a person for life. Many of them would be happy to get a decent chance for employment. Of course proper safe guards would be needed,

3. Again, there are women from red light areas, it might not be lucrative enough for a younger women, but women getting past their primes might.

4. Many mildly differently abled people can be trained, as it is known that they perform repetitive jobs competently.

When all is said and done, it IS not the profession of choice. But those who are at their wit's end and in a hopeless situation, can be trained and employed gainfully and honorably as long as they are not exploited because of this.

There may be many practical as well as legal problems which will have to be addressed.

Actually Govt. of India has one such initiative, but it is hopelessly inadequate. Once this training and remunerations are at par with nursing training we might attract more people.

All this needs initiative and resources. At one time I thought I could do it, but did not have the resources, and then also had other problems.
But I think it is doable. We need an organization which is fair to both parties, and can be trusted. Is anyone game?
Click to expand...

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

#21
Mar 25, 2016 #22

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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shobhamma said: ↑

Dear @Agatha83 and @Viswamitra
It is indeed distressing, but this is true everywhere.

Where are the trained people? No one wants to be trained in geriatric care. Everyone is looking for office or media jobs. Even if they don't get them, no matter. This kind of jobs are beneath their dignity.

My mother was bedridden for 4 years. My brother and bhabhi were lucky to find a woman living with them full time. She herself was diabetic, but took good care of my mother. But it is rare.

Some of my friends hired nurses from hospitals , which were more expensive but effective.
re @jayasala42
The attenders clean the patients only twice at 8A, M and 8 P. M.Intermediary urine/bowel excretions are left uncleaned.What a pity!

This attendent problem is there in the homes too. I have worked with one home and know the trouble we had . Cleaning twice was barely possible.

As I see there is a big divide , here is a crying need for trained help which is just not available but IMHO some resources are available if someone with initiative can tap :

1. If an organization can take up training , there are Vrindavan widows who simply go begging and chanting and get barely enough to live.

2. Then there are jailbirds , people of both sexes who do not get a decent job again because of some felony. I am not talking about the rapists and murderers , but there are many other lesser crimes which brand a person for life. Many of them would be happy to get a decent chance for employment. Of course proper safe guards would be needed,

3. Again, there are women from red light areas, it might not be lucrative enough for a younger women, but women getting past their primes might.

4. Many mildly differently abled people can be trained, as it is known that they perform repetitive jobs competently.

When all is said and done, it IS not the profession of choice. But those who are at their wit's end and in a hopeless situation, can be trained and employed gainfully and honorably as long as they are not exploited because of this.

There may be many practical as well as legal problems which will have to be addressed.

Actually Govt. of India has one such initiative, but it is hopelessly inadequate. Once this training and remunerations are at par with nursing training we might attract more people.

All this needs initiative and resources. At one time I thought I could do it, but did not have the resources, and then also had other problems.
But I think it is doable. We need an organization which is fair to both parties, and can be trusted. Is anyone game?
Click to expand...

shobhamma said: ↑

Dear @Agatha83 and @Viswamitra
It is indeed distressing, but this is true everywhere.

Where are the trained people? No one wants to be trained in geriatric care. Everyone is looking for office or media jobs. Even if they don't get them, no matter. This kind of jobs are beneath their dignity.

My mother was bedridden for 4 years. My brother and bhabhi were lucky to find a woman living with them full time. She herself was diabetic, but took good care of my mother. But it is rare.

Some of my friends hired nurses from hospitals , which were more expensive but effective.
re @jayasala42
The attenders clean the patients only twice at 8A, M and 8 P. M.Intermediary urine/bowel excretions are left uncleaned.What a pity!

This attendent problem is there in the homes too. I have worked with one home and know the trouble we had . Cleaning twice was barely possible.

As I see there is a big divide , here is a crying need for trained help which is just not available but IMHO some resources are available if someone with initiative can tap :

1. If an organization can take up training , there are Vrindavan widows who simply go begging and chanting and get barely enough to live.

2. Then there are jailbirds , people of both sexes who do not get a decent job again because of some felony. I am not talking about the rapists and murderers , but there are many other lesser crimes which brand a person for life. Many of them would be happy to get a decent chance for employment. Of course proper safe guards would be needed,

3. Again, there are women from red light areas, it might not be lucrative enough for a younger women, but women getting past their primes might.

4. Many mildly differently abled people can be trained, as it is known that they perform repetitive jobs competently.

When all is said and done, it IS not the profession of choice. But those who are at their wit's end and in a hopeless situation, can be trained and employed gainfully and honorably as long as they are not exploited because of this.

There may be many practical as well as legal problems which will have to be addressed.

Actually Govt. of India has one such initiative, but it is hopelessly inadequate. Once this training and remunerations are at par with nursing training we might attract more people.

All this needs initiative and resources. At one time I thought I could do it, but did not have the resources, and then also had other problems.
But I think it is doable. We need an organization which is fair to both parties, and can be trusted. Is anyone game?
Click to expand...

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

#22
Mar 25, 2016 #23

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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Dear shobamma,
There have been quite a number of social conscious people who would like to open retirement homes for senior citizens but there are many Unnecessary hurdles, useless restrictions, rules and regulations put up by the Government which prevents even the most ambitious group of people from proceeding further.

I have personally visited many of the senior citizens home, which lack even basic necessities like a stretcher or a wheel chair or even a nurse. Many old people are made to live in the second floor or 3rd floor, with no lift, owing to space crunch. Your suggestions are pretty good, but the mind set of most of the people who are unable to afford even one square meal, is to work easy and earn more money. Many of the young attenders when asked to improve their skills and knowledge, reading newspapers, improve their English speaking skills or joining vocational classes , they simply refused and were more interested n chatting long hours on their mobiles. So how could one make people have a professional outliook when it comes to work and not treat it as a picnic party?Thanks for your wonderful feedback, shobamma.

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

#23
Mar 25, 2016 #24

suryakala IL Hall of Fame

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Dear @Agatha83,

Behind all that light hearted and interesting write up, I see a loving, caring, concerned daughter having a hands full of difficult but delicate situation, still capable of a smile in most difficult situations. A role model for your generation. Cheers.

Heart full of appreciation for you, and your skill as a writer.

suryakala, Mar 25, 2016

suryakala, Mar 25, 2016

#24

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Mar 25, 2016 #25

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Dear Agatha83,
I commend you for managing to look after your mother at your home, inspite of all the "Attending " problems. I am personally in a situation where i am not able to keep my mother aged 84, with me in bangalore. Apart from physical disability due to a serious fracture in her right hand due to a road accident, she has psychiatric issues also to some extent. After attending and being with her with the help of my brother for a month or so, we have left her in a palliative and pain relief centre in Chennai. I am naturally ridden by guilt at times, but in the long run , feel she is safer hands at the home, as there are nurses, attendents available through out the day and night. My brother visits her every weekend and i talk to her over the phone frequently and visit her/bring her over to visit us for occasions. There is definitely no easy solution in care of aged person in these times, and we can only do the best in our given situations.
Jayasala maam,
please do take care in the kitchen, especially if you are alone. My mother was managing doing all the cooking /housework by herself until 6 months ago in her home in chennai. It was a constant worry as my unmarried brother would be out of the house almost the whole day and she would be alone. Every talk over the phone i would tell her not to leave the Apt. to go to shop outside- as a main road would have to be crossed. And, things happened exactly as i had feared. She crossed the road and was mowed down by a passing biker with serious injuries. By gods grace she recovered and her hand has also healed to some extent. But the amount of suffering at this age is something which i feel so helpless about.
By sharing our concerns, there is some comfort for which i am thankful to IL.

joylokhi, Mar 25, 2016

joylokhi, Mar 25, 2016

#25
Mar 25, 2016 #26

joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

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Dear Agatha83,
I commend you for managing to look after your mother at your home, inspite of all the "Attending " problems. I am personally in a situation where i am not able to keep my mother aged 84, with me in bangalore. Apart from physical disability due to a serious fracture in her right hand due to a road accident, she has psychiatric issues also to some extent. After attending and being with her with the help of my brother for a month or so, we have left her in a palliative and pain relief centre in Chennai. I am naturally ridden by guilt at times, but in the long run , feel she is safer hands at the home, as there are nurses, attendents available through out the day and night. My brother visits her every weekend and i talk to her over the phone frequently and visit her/bring her over to visit us for occasions. There is definitely no easy solution in care of aged person in these times, and we can only do the best in our given situations.
Jayasala maam,
please do take care in the kitchen, especially if you are alone. My mother was managing doing all the cooking /housework by herself until 6 months ago in her home in chennai. It was a constant worry as my unmarried brother would be out of the house almost the whole day and she would be alone. Every talk over the phone i would tell her not to leave the Apt. to go to shop outside- as a main road would have to be crossed. And, things happened exactly as i had feared. She crossed the road and was mowed down by a passing biker with serious injuries. By gods grace she recovered and her hand has also healed to some extent. But the amount of suffering at this age is something which i feel so helpless about.
By sharing our concerns, there is some comfort for which i am thankful to IL.

joylokhi, Mar 25, 2016

joylokhi, Mar 25, 2016

#26

Agatha83 likes this.
Mar 25, 2016 #27

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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suryakala said: ↑

Dear @Agatha83,

Behind all that light hearted and interesting write up, I see a loving, caring, concerned daughter having a hands full of difficult but delicate situation, still capable of a smile in most difficult situations. A role model for your generation. Cheers.

Heart full of appreciation for you, and your skill as a writer.
Click to expand...

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

#27
Mar 25, 2016 #28

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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Dear suryakala,
Thanks for your loving compliments. I feel much relieved and light hearted after pouring out my woes in this forum and getting a warm feedback in return. Hats off to this supportive IL community.

Agatha83

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 25, 2016

#28

suryakala likes this.
Mar 26, 2016 #29

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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joylokhi said: ↑

Dear Agatha83,
I commend you for managing to look after your mother at your home, inspite of all the "Attending " problems. I am personally in a situation where i am not able to keep my mother aged 84, with me in bangalore. Apart from physical disability due to a serious fracture in her right hand due to a road accident, she has psychiatric issues also to some extent. After attending and being with her with the help of my brother for a month or so, we have left her in a palliative and pain relief centre in Chennai. I am naturally ridden by guilt at times, but in the long run , feel she is safer hands at the home, as there are nurses, attendents available through out the day and night. My brother visits her every weekend and i talk to her over the phone frequently and visit her/bring her over to visit us for occasions. There is definitely no easy solution in care of aged person in these times, and we can only do the best in our given situations.
Jayasala maam,
please do take care in the kitchen, especially if you are alone. My mother was managing doing all the cooking /housework by herself until 6 months ago in her home in chennai. It was a constant worry as my unmarried brother would be out of the house almost the whole day and she would be alone. Every talk over the phone i would tell her not to leave the Apt. to go to shop outside- as a main road would have to be crossed. And, things happened exactly as i had feared. She crossed the road and was mowed down by a passing biker with serious injuries. By gods grace she recovered and her hand has also healed to some extent. But the amount of suffering at this age is something which i feel so helpless about.
By sharing our concerns, there is some comfort for which i am thankful to IL.
Click to expand...

Agatha83, Mar 26, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 26, 2016

#29
Mar 26, 2016 #30

Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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Dear joylokhi,

Thank you for the deep concern you have shown on me through this post. Inspite of all my mom's physical needs been looked after, what she looks upon fondly is the emotional connect. When we are dog tired through out the day, she loves to talk non stop about the past, relatives who never think about her leave alone visit her,and about her office friends none of them whom I personally know. With her daily demands of sweets, cakes ,ice creams, her being a sugar patient, many times I am at my wits end trying to convince her. Doctors advice me to give her whatever she wishes, but in the end it is a run to the hospital if her sugar level shoots up. So it is a daily drama in my house!

Agatha83

Last edited: Mar 26, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 26, 2016

Agatha83, Mar 26, 2016

#30

shobhamma and joylokhi like this.

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