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Are You Your Husband's Dream Woman?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Apr 21, 2020.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    Nine years and two moons ago, in Feburary 2011, our dear @iyerviji started a thread in Married Life forum! I chanced upon it only recently. My loss for so long.

    The thread was: Is your husband your dream man

    This thread is based on that. Thank you for the idea and inspiration, my dear pyaari Viji.

    So:

    Are you your husband's dream woman? If your husband was describing you to someone, what would he say? What would he list as your positives and not so positives?
    .
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    Last edited: Apr 21, 2020
    KashmirFlower and anika987 like this.
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    Generally, when I start a thread, I know exactly what will be my own response to the question. : ) In this case, I am a little lost. Not due to the fear of being modest, but truly lost and not sure. So here is the first draft. My H would probably say:

    Is she my dream woman? No. But she makes most of my dreams come true. Way before Inception was a movie, she knew how to plant dreams in my mind that she made come true. We fell in love and had our share of looking deeply into each other's eyes but most of our life together has been about gazing together into the future. If I had to choose one word, it would be enterprising -- jugaadu. Couldn't have asked for a better mother for my children. Has an elephant's memory. Remembers the good and the bad from the past in intricate detail. Does not bring it up often but makes sure I have noticed that she is not bringing it up.
     
  3. SGBV

    SGBV Finest Post Winner

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    So, I asked my H.... and this is his answer :)

    Yes. She is my dream woman. Life would have been better had I lived in a dream land with this woman forever. But unfortunately real life is far from dream life; hence all the struggle.

    I liked her intelligence and boldness while we were dating a decade back, but I didn't know I will have to be the victim of her intelligence down the lane.

    Though he mentioned this jokingly, I know this is what he feels from deep inside.
    The man who was so proud about my intelligence and smartness in the past, has been under the impression that his life would have been better had he married a little home bound/introvert/village type of woman that suits his family dynamics. Its too late!
    At the same time, he knows he can't have the cake and eat it too.
    Because he can't expect such an introvert villager to make money in $ and run the family on behalf of him... and simultaneously be his loving wife and a good mother of his kids. Still.... i get the gist of what he wants...
    I realize that I should be dumb and better close my eyes and ears at times to gain more peace and happiness in life!
    Lessons learnt after a decade....
     
    rachaputi, NOW and Rihana like this.
  4. SunPa

    SunPa Platinum IL'ite

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    Now my monkey mind wants to ask him this kwestin, going to ask this weekend.

    Long post alert - meandering reply and not one fitting the question but then that is how DH is. He will tell you that the question isnt correct, change question to make it more meaningful.

    He would pause to think and pause again to word it such that it isnt hurtful and say (Like this what I see and hear him literally saying , voice, accent, pauses , words and phrases he uses)

    No, not really the dream woman I wanted. But she is good for me, has made my life more meaningful I think.

    We have had wonderful times and stressful times. Cooking-wise she is good, not as good as my mother's cooking though, but she cooks more practically and adapts well. She makes very good pongal, biryani , roti and all north indian dishes. Her ginger tea is the very good, but coffee is so-so. She will focus on making food healthy and not let me eat too much. I appreciate that.

    Gotten used to her nagging, it will be better if she does it more pleasantly. She also needs to improve on her short temper and be more patient, especially with children.

    She will handle everything, she is of great support, most of the things she will do herself. She likes to do new things and ventures into new areas which is good but one must also plan and think of pros and cons , cannot simply rush into things, she must understand this. Sometimes she wants help but she wont ask, expects me to understand and just gets mad for no good reason at times.

    She takes very good care of the family. Tries to do too much. And unnecessarily stresses herself. And worries a lot about us. She shouldnt worry so much, it will affect her health.

    So to answer your question - She is a very good partner and we are happy and that is what matters, no?


    Ok I will update on how much on/off mark I am, after asking him this weekend.
     
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  5. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    I posed this question to the H. He said be glad you are not my nightmare woman. I laughed at the time but now I'm like :thinking:.
     
    SCA, Amica, rachaputi and 4 others like this.
  6. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    When he married me..he used to say this..

    “What puniya I did to have you as my wife?”

    NOW..

    “Your mom cheated and married you to me. your family is happy but my head is breaking”

    :D
     
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  7. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Mine is Something similar to this.
    He says I used to be very soft spoken and very good in initial days but not anymore.. :smilingimp:
     
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  8. PurpleRoses

    PurpleRoses Gold IL'ite

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    The point is do the husbands tell truth?
    When the simple questions like "Am I looking fat in this outfit?" Or "How am I looking today?" Sorts of questions don't get genuine replies. Haha
     
  9. heron

    heron Platinum IL'ite

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    *asks H*
    H: ..well if you could cook biryani in 10 min after kids homework on a week da....
    Me: I said dream woman not wonder womn
     
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  10. SunPa

    SunPa Platinum IL'ite

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    :roflmao:
     
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