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Are We Completely Blameless?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by satchitananda, Sep 2, 2015.

  1. NaiveLady

    NaiveLady Senior IL'ite

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    Also forgot to mention: Differences in Social Circles/Dynamics: due to having been in US most of my life, I have collected various friends not of our Indian background. After having met two such friends (one at a Hare Krishna temple and another with her Indian husband at their home), my MIL asked me if I have any friends of our (Tamilian) background. I guess she wasn't super comfortable with meeting those two friends. At a later point in time, when we had moved out to an area having no other Indians in our apartment complex, my in-laws did not have anyone to hang out/spend time with during the day when they came to visit us, and said so when talking with family over the phone. They (especially my MIL) are only comfortable interacting with other Indians, so that is another difference they see in me.
     
    hermitcrab and satchitananda like this.
  2. Sandyr46

    Sandyr46 Gold IL'ite

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    I just feel once married relationship the husband automatically takes a center stage in our life. Everything revolves around pleasing him and thats all with expectations. Obviously when you are investing so much in a relationship thats bound to happen. And that leads to neglecting 'you'.

    Deviation is need of the hour - Every women should make herself her top priority. Get a little selfish. Work, get a hobby, and have interests and relationships with friends and family outside of the one with the husband. Once he recognizes that you’re independent, and you could leave if he continues to neglect you and ignore your needs tables will turn.

    But here we are - I read posts on a daily basis about hubbies caring about their mothers more or loving them more than their wives and the dissappointment, heartaches, resentment n health isses that follow. And where does this end? Fine u get a divorce then what, you get lonely and marry again. Same old story once the honeymoon period fades off. Again there is a MIL n so on n so forth. Its a vicious circle ladies and ur just being dragged into it like a sinking mud pit.

    So obsessed with fighting for attention, love and respect that you miss out on 'ur' life and before time u get worn off...look at the bigger picture. Life has so much more to offer. Its ur life, ur beautiful life, u live it once so y not just make the best out of it. Sending u all much love. Sandya
     
    hermitcrab and satchitananda like this.

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