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Age and fertility

Discussion in 'Fertility & Trying to Conceive' started by hippo, Aug 27, 2007.

  1. hippo

    hippo New IL'ite

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    :-(

    Hi, I am a mother to 3 yr old boy and my age is 33 ...now any place i go i have poeple asking if i plan another one ...but my age is 33 yrs and i am told after 30 chance of abnormality increases...i had my boy when i was 30 ...that too i developed gestational diabetes and high pressure ...so my first pregnancy was "high risk "...if i become pregnant again , i will deveop pressure and all...but i am MORE bothered about the fact that chance of abnormality increases...that fact is scaring me from trying to concieve ...please advise and help:cry:
     
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  2. sunitha

    sunitha Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Hippo

    If you want another child,pls do not delay any further.33 is okay,above 35 is when doctors do test to check for other problems.Further this is your second child.I had my first when I was 29.I too had Hypertension and GD.Now my doctor tells me that it is not a must that Hypertension will occur in the second delivery also.I am now 34 and I am also planning on second child.:2thumbsup:
     
  3. jaishree9

    jaishree9 Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Hippo
    Though the most favoured age for concieving is between 23 - 30 but 33 is not that much late. THough u have to have regular checkups as u has high BP in first preg chances r more with advancing age & subsequent pregnancies . the gentic abnormility like down syndrone & all increases more after 35 to 40 years & regular sonographic chekup can tell u abt the development of baby . If needed aminocentasis ( examination of fluid from gestational sac at 12wekk can be done & to rule out any in born diseases. )There r many good drugs for control of BP. A watch for any sings of intrauterine growth retardation of baby r must by simple sonography. U can plan ur next baby without much warry as the medical faclities r now tremandous to help elderly pregnant women & 33 is not althat elder age. .A sibling is also important for ur child for psychological feeling as well as feeling of kinship.
    Best of luck
    Jaishree
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2007
  4. tweenie27

    tweenie27 New IL'ite

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    Did you have a successful and smooth pregnancy after 35??

    Hi all,
    I really want to hear replies to this, especially from those who have had successful pregnancies after age 35.
    I know the doctors say its possible. Fine. That all agreed, but i still need to hear from those who have gone through it themselves. I would like to know if they had any problems, that arose during their pregnancy, and how it was solved if at all. Added to this, i would like to know if you were overweight before conceiving, and also if you had High blood pressure/diabetes before or during pregnancy. How was it all taken care of for you? Did u have a healthy baby?
    I am 35, overweight (trying to lose slowly but successfully, but it will still take time), and i have been diagnosed with high blood pressure only a month back, and have been put on medication for this.

    I am trying to get pregnant, but fear a lot of things-- as mentioned above.
     
  5. sindukarthik

    sindukarthik New IL'ite

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    Later pregnancy

    Hi friends,

    I got married recently in sep. Everybody has started asking long back anything special??!! As they always ask in villages. But myself and my husband have decided to have child after 3 or 4 months. But before that I hear so many problems between couples now in conceiving. I really get scared on that. Everybody has some problems, since they had postponed pregnancy may be 1 year or 2 years. Why is it so? Is that really a problem conceiving later?? I believe most Indian women face these problems!!

    From childhood if I see somebody carrying I get tensed somewhat.. I don’t know why!! Now hearing all these problems I get even more scared.. I have sinus and migrane now. taking tablets for it. Can anyone advice me on this? I am confused.

    Sindhu
     
  6. Aadhusmom

    Aadhusmom Gold IL'ite

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    Re: Later pregnancy

    Hi Sindhu,
    How old are you and your DH? Infertility chances increase after the age of 35. If you both are otherwise healthy and your periods are regular then you are unlikely to have fertility problems just because you wait a year before trying for a baby. It also depends on what contraception you plan on using until then. (Oral pills can have an effect for upto 6 mnths after you stop them). Dont worry about what people say or ask. Now they will ask abt a baby, after the baby there will be endless advice on child-rearing, then why not a 2nd baby etc. It NEVER stops. Talk to your DH and take decisions based on what is right for the 2 of you. I postponed having a baby for 4 yrs after marriage and conceived within 3 mnths of starting to try for one, so dont get tense. Good luck!

    Vanathi.

    PS - Migraine /sinus have no bearing on fertility.
     
  7. perfectly_perfect

    perfectly_perfect Silver IL'ite

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    Re: Later pregnancy

    I will advice you to go and see docter before decideing on the method of contraception you want. I did that. Dont listen the people. Its their work to ask these type of questions. Listen to your heart. See when both of you are ready to take this responcibility then only you can enjoy it.
    take care
    Vatsala
     
  8. sindukarthik

    sindukarthik New IL'ite

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    Re: Later pregnancy

    Hi vanathi,

    Thanks for your reply. I feel better on hearing you. I am 28 yrs old now and get my periods monthly regularly. I have a great husband. Ours is a love marriage. He thinks if we use any contraception or if i start taking any pills, it may affect my health. So, he says we will not have relationship?? till we both decide to have a child..

    But why do I get nervous on seeing pregnant ladies? should i refer to any gynaecologist regarding this? Is it good to have medication before trying to conceive. Pls suggest me..

    sindhu



     
  9. Aadhusmom

    Aadhusmom Gold IL'ite

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    Re: Later pregnancy

    Dear Sindhu,
    Since you are only 28 you can afford to wait for a year or so, but try not to push having a baby to beyond that. Please dont get offended, but I doubt if abstinence is a good solution to your situation. The first year of married life is the time for both of you to develop a bond and abstaining is not going to help. Instead I would suggest visiting a gynec and discussing the methods available and your doubts regarding each and then selecting whatever suits you best. (The oral pill does not spoil your health, but if you are against medication then condoms are a good alternative).
    Regarding your nervousness on seeing pregnant women maybe you can think or talk to a friend abt why you feel so. A gynec wont be of much help for this. The only thing you need to start before trying to conceive is folic acid. It is a vitamin which helps to prevent spine/nervous system disorders in the baby and should be started 3 - 4 mnths BEFORE starting to try for a baby.
    Dont worry. It will go well for you both!

    Vanathi.
     
  10. Aarushi

    Aarushi Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Later pregnancy

    Hi Sindhu,

    You have just gotten married. Spend a couple of years enriching your marital bond and enjoying your married life (and I agree with Aadhusmom that abstinence is not going to help).

    If anybody pressurizes you about having a baby, then tell them that you will tell them when you are ready and not before. Or that they will be the first to know whenever you decide. Basically you need to deflect those kind of annoying questions. My MIL told me (rather ordered me) the 3rd day of my marriage that I should have a baby within 9 months otherwise it means that I have a medical problem! I think it is a common problem in the desi community. Every aunt, cousin, in-law feels its their duty to probe and order you to have a baby...!!

    You need to be a little strong in replying to them, otherwise they'll keep bugging you and you will keep getting bugged. After 2 years of nagging, I told my MIL and sundry other relatives who kept on calling me and telling me to have a baby, that it was me who would be taking care of the baby night and day so I will decide when I'm ready for it. And right now, I'm NOT ready.

    Having a baby is a big responsibility - emotionally and physically. It is not like buying aloo palak...so do it when YOU feel ready.

    Coming back to the contraception part, I would suggest that if you don't want to take pills, go for condoms. They work for mostly everybody, so why shouldn't they work for your hubby and you?? If your hubby doesn't agree then drag him to your ob/gyn to explain some facts of life to him.

    I had a baby after 4-5 years and I'm soo glad I waited..I enjoyed my married life, traveled a lot, had a lot of fun and now I'm enjoying my status as a mother. And don't believe all yr relatives who say that waiting makes your fertility go down. If you are otherwise healthy, you should be perfectly fine. I conceived with 2 months of trying. I know many of my friends who also waited several years and then conceived within a few months of trying.

    So do not believe in any old wives tale just because elders are saying that. Check with your doctor and ask any questions or fears that you have.

    Love,
    Aarushi
     

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