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A Wedding And Other Unrelated Matters

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Kamalji, Nov 26, 2007.

  1. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    A Wedding & Other Unrelated Matters<?XML:NAMESPACE PREFIX = O />



    Today it seems is a very great " Saawa", meaning the auspicious day for marriages.In Delhi the normal Savas have 5000 weddings, but i read today's Saawa has 40,000 weddings.Can u imagine how many kids will be born 9 months hence,and like hotels , all maternity homes too will be housefull.


    My friend's daughter is getting married.This is the second marriage in our group, the first being my daughters's, two years back.Yesterday was the function,the sangeet cum ring ceremony,at a hotel 20 kms away from town.But before that i had to attend another wedding, on the exact opposite side of town.Well, somehow managed to it.


    The boy;s side being pure Veggies and teetotalers had to make my own arrangements. So off i packed a plastic basket, with a mini bar.A Royal Stag bottle,2 sodas, opener, peg measurer, two glasses, and a few namkins, and off we went.First we went inside and met the couple, the father of the bride, took out a picture with him, as proof that Kamal had come, and off disappeared to the car to have my quota of drinks.


    My friends were sitting in the bar, but i did not join them.I dont have the money to burn for a bar.One of my rich friends,X, was sitting with Y and Z in the bar.X loves a drink called "Campari", a red coloured drink, which reminds me of the Doctor's syrup medicine.He got it here in the bar at a very expensive price, but they had just two pegs, and my friend got very upset with the barman, who said not many drink it, sorry this is what we have.The Manager was called, and he was a meek fellow.He apologized, and brought a plate of free snacks to placate X. Seeing this X blew his top, bcs what they brought was from the wedding, the one we were attending, and the manager thought we were outsiders, so he might give the wedding food to the drinkers in the bar.


    Another friend, not very close these days, just walked in the bar,said Hello to our friends, ordered a beer, drank and vamoosed,as though this bar belonged to his father ! My friend X landed up paying the Bill for all and this friend.Serves him right.

    Another Friend met, and he greets me " Hi Buddy, long time man, where have u been ? " We stay a few lanes away.I told him we meet only at weddings and funerals, and next time which of these ones will we meet at ? the guy is shocked out of his wits, and says Shubh Shubh Bol.I said both will be neither of us dont worry, so we wait for someone common to both of us to marry or die.


    I was joined by other friends and we had a whale of a time in the car, drinking and joking away, and it was fun really.We went inside to eat food, after frantic calls from my wife, to find out where i was.She knows i am not a flirt,neither a Gay,so we had to rush our drinks and go meet our wives.And it is a pain for me to meet people, smile continously, and hold out my hand,being polite and decent,and half the time wondering who this fellow is,though i know him well.Since the food was poison, sorry Veg, had it fast and vamoosed,before u could say Hi.


    Pheras - Today in Gurudwara were the pheras.After every phera the couple was to sit down, and agian get up after a while and again walk around the Guru Granthsaab.But it was not Seven for sure.Later i came to know it was 4.Why ?while the guy was saying his Gurubanis(reading from the holy book,I was half asleep.My wife was glaring at me, she sitting on the ladies side.Now i know if i ever turn insomaniac, I will come and listen kirtans in this Gurudwara, and fall asleep there itself.

    We had to remove shoes, and i find that very funny.Because then my socks gets exposed, and most of them are torn,with my thumb peeking out, courtesy Tuffy who loves to eat my smelly socks,rather chew.So I checked and found this pair to be OK, otherwise i would have removed my socks and put them in my pockets.And we had to put a handkerchief on our heads, and luckily today i was carrying one, otherwise i would have had to beg or borrow one.

    The best part was the food, again veg,and was asking tips there from friends about investments and got quite a few good tips to invest in Mutual funds and the names of the funds.Imagine discussing money in the Lord's abode ! Shame on me.

    We friends went to the park opposite the Gurudwara to have a ciggie.A guy peed on the wall of the garden, and unluckily he came in the garden,and my friend called him and gave him a lecture on etiquette.The guy apolgoised, and went away to meet his GF who was sitting on the bench waiting for this guy to relieve himself and come back.He did not even wash his hands and he would touch her with his hands.Yech !


    Another friend said, his cousin Mukesh had gone to UK for a month’s holiday to his uncle, and since the uncle was busy with work, this guy used to roam the streets.Once he felt like relieving himself and located a toilet, and he entered and was shocked to see two guys on the floor doing things.Well he jumped over them and stood to relieve himself, when another guy came next to him,and relieved himself, all the while looking down to my friends side, with an evil grin.this guy just ran for his life, and while zipping up got stuck half way,but just ran.


    That reminds me of the time My wife and daughters went to London to stay with my Saali (wife’s sister), and they had a great time.Seems they went to Harrods , and found it fascinating.They did not want to buy, just browse.Fine.Now suddenly wife and kids want to use the loo.As they entered, they were asked to pay 2 pounds per head to use the loo.Well everything dried up on hearing this.Then the guy suggested, that if u have coffee in the Harrods restaurant for 3 pounds each, the loo will come free with a free ‘ loo ‘ coupon.Crazy.


    A group of 20 of us friends had gone to see Sarfarosh, the Amir Khan movie when it was released 7/8 years back maybe, in Rajmandir,the finest theatre u will find in India.In interval me and friend went to the loo, and what we see is a 20 year old guy peeing in the wash basin, as all the loos were full.Maybe this guy was bursting at the seams as they say.My friend suddenly turned and slapped him hard,and made him wash the wash basin with his hands.If I had not held him back, he would have killed the guy.The poor guy ran with all hanging, as they say, and im sure never ever to come to Rajmandir ever.


    The reception is in the evening,and my bar is ready for the car.But today being Monday,God Bless when I don’t eat non veg, so I will relish the food, and have value for the envelope that I will give today.Burp !

     
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  2. Nivedi

    Nivedi New IL'ite

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    Lots of humor sprinkled in this post, Kamalji. I enjoyed reading it, especially the socks and loo coupon stuff. Big Laugh
     
  3. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Nivedi,

    Thanks for the appreciation, and thanks for this being the first comment.These days my blogs are not attracting much comments,maybe everyone is bored of my style of blogs.

    So let me write the weepy weepy sort of blogs to make everyone cry.tskRegards.kamal
     
  4. Moonbeams

    Moonbeams Bronze IL'ite

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    I enjoy reading ur write-ups..full of humors n messages...Though I am poor at giving comments, but that does not mean v bored with ur write -ups...Keep writing.....
     
  5. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Moobnbeam,

    It is comments from people like u that encourage me.So keep commenting, to keep my moral up.Feels nice to know i could make u smile.Thanks and regards.kamal
     

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