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A Tribute to my FIL.............

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Arunarc, Mar 9, 2010.

  1. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I hope I am posting this in the right place.
    I use to always mention in some posts that my FIL is real gem of a person and i will not be able to see anyone like him.

    On 11<SUP>th</SUP> Feb 2010, he passed away due to massive heart attack leaving behind his wife, three sons and three daughters with their families.

    I would like to share with you his life, the troubles he had gone through. However he never lost his hopes and stood like a pillar supporting his family from the very childhood.

    He started working at the age of 7. He had lost his dad during his childhood and he did not remember his face but he supported his mom and 2 brothers from the age of 7. He was very much interested in studying but never got a chance due to responsibility at very young age.

    At the age of 19 he got a permanent job in a perfume factory. A very hard working person who worked day and night with the only aim to give comfort to his family. He had some hearing problems due to which he could not progress in his job. But he never ignored his duties and worked as hard as possible.
    He got married at the age of 20. The family then went on increasing as his brothers also got married. But since one of his brother died early, he had to support his family also, who had 4 kids. This was not possible with the job alone and he had to start a small grocery shop close to his house. His own kids and brothers small kids started helping him. Sometimes he opted for night shift for his job so that day time he can spend time in the shop. In total my FIL took care of 12 kids, 7 his own, 4 were his brothers and one was his cousin sister’s ( who left the kid under his care and went of).

    He encouraged all the kids for education. Most of them however could manage only up to 10th. One of his brother’s elder son was very good in drawing so he supported him in that field and made him an art teacher. Among his own kids only my DH completed his education, and 2 others studied up to 12<SUP>th</SUP> class. He opened another grocery shop and gave it to his brother’s kids.

    DH was the most clever and interested in his studies. FIL beared all the trouble and educated him by sending him to Mumbai, to study in UDCT. His other two sons gave him good support and then he got his 3 DDs married. Later he made a small house for himself. Got all his and brothers kids married and settled them in life.

    Without anticipating anything in return, he would always help others. He always lived a simple life but tried to give maximum comforts to his and brothers kids. He was a person who would get adjusted in short time. He knew each and every kids likings and he use to give them accordingly. Not only kids even his DILs. He never had any objections to my wearing western kind of dresses as long as they are decent. Whenever I use to visit my FIL’s place he use to get me all the things that I like most. I use to tell him so many times, Baba (this is what we all call him) don’t do it. Initially I felt odd about it. He use to say that since we visit for few days therefore you need to enjoy here as you do in your mom’s place.

    He never used any rude words to anyone in his life. Even if someone did not speak to him he use to make it a point to go and talk to that person. Just cannot compare this person to anyone. Not a single person would pass the house without speaking to him. That includes kids, teenagers and elders. Everyone would speak to him and he too loved speaking to all of them.

    At the age of 70, after completing all his responsibilities, he started spending most of his time with grand kids and in pooja room. Last couple of years he went through some minor health related problems. Few months back he got a mild heart attack when he was walking on the road. After this he stopped going out. He would spend morning time on the terrace to water the plant and do the light exercises. Then he would read books like Bhagwat Gita. I had presented him that book couple of years back. He finished reading it twice and was reading for the 3<SUP>rd</SUP> time.

    One week before he passed away, everyone felt that he has become very active and there was typical glow on his face. During this week, he made it a point to visit all the temples in Belgaum. In one of the famous temple he even performed Abhishekham in the name of all his three sons. Just one day before death he took the whole family to our kuladevata temple which is about 100 km from his place. He called my DS also who is studying in Belgaum. However, he could not join them due to important classes. On the way back, he visited few more temples to return back late evening. Then very next day morning he woke up at 6 AM as usual and started his daily routine. After some time he then went on the terrace. After watering couple of plants, he just collapsed due to heart attack. Unfortunately he was attended only after 30 minutes. He was taken to hospital but it was too late.

    We still can’t believe that he is no more with us. We all miss you very much Baba.
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2010
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  2. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    Feel very sad to hear about your FIL's death. May his soul rest in peace.
    He has struggled a lot in life. Good that he visited all the temples. He will be always blessing your family from above. He seems to be a very affectionate FIL. You were lucky to have him as your FIL. Good to know that your husband fulfilled his wishes of studying well.

    love
    viji
     
  3. SoundVijay

    SoundVijay Gold IL'ite

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    Feeling sorry on hearing your FIL's demise and may his soul rest in peace. It is really great to know about such a person who struggled in life since 7 years. Good to hear about such a great person from his DIL. He is simply great. Kudos to you FIL:thumbsup

    Regards,

    Sound.
     
  4. ALPA

    ALPA Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Aruna,

    He was a great man who conquered everything and crossed all hurdles.
    may God rest his soul in peace.
    OM SHANTI OM SHANTI OM SHANTI

    love
    alpa:cheers
     
  5. Priya_Mommy

    Priya_Mommy Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Aruna
    No doubt, he is a great man with unconditional love towards all his family memebers. Sorry to hear about his demise, its a great loss to entire family.
    May his sould rest in peace.
     
  6. Saraswathipv

    Saraswathipv IL Hall of Fame

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    Queeny dear,

    It was touching to read about your FIL. Though I have heard a lot about him from you, this tribute, moved me.

    For all the struggle that he went through, I am glad that he had some rest during his last days, with the children sort of settled in their own ways.
    His blessings will always be there for you all.

    I join you in prayers for his soul :bowdown.
     
  7. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    EQ,

    :bowdown:bowdown:bowdown to the departed soul. may his soul rest in peace.

    even i have heard you talk about your big family and your baba. it is really so nice to know more about such a great person. you are all so blessed to have had his blessings.
     
  8. sridivya

    sridivya New IL'ite

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    Aruna,

    Though some of the members here say they have read about your earlier posts mentioning your FIL but this is my first time reading and my eyes are filled with tears that such a great soul passed away.

    At a tender age he started shouldering responsibility and if you see it is his good nature that he leaves behind. A total stranger like me feels so remorse at his death.

    May his soul rest in peace!!

    Thanks for sharing your FIL's story and what great tribute can it be than his good deeds and intentions he left behind.

    Sridivya.
     
  9. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

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    Aruna,

    I'm so sorry for you and your family's big loss. But thank you for taking the time to share his legacy with us, it was truely an amazing story. One thing I noticed and what I bet gives you great comfort... was that you were able to spend his last days with him together as a family, doing the things he loved. May his soul rest in peace, and his legacy live on through his kids, dil's and grandkids.
     
  10. guesshoo

    guesshoo IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Aruna,

    I am very sorry to hear about your loss. Your FIL sounds like a wonderful person. I hope you and your family recover from this huge loss and take inspiration from his great life. Take care.
     

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