3 years into marriage

Stuti is married for 3 years. Its a typical marriage. She has a husband who earns decently well. Her daughter of 1 1/2 years is the best daughter she can ever have. But her marriage has transitioned from a happy marriage to a stagnant marriage.

When Stuti was young she had promised herself that she would have a marriage where she was an equal in the marriage. Stuti believed in fairytale marriages and dreamt that the love in her marriage would be forever.

She married under pressure from her parents, but quickly fell in love with her husband Sahil. He was intelligent, humorous supportive, with a forward bend of mind. She loved everything about him. When they were engaged Sahil was working in Surat, while his parents stayed in Mumbai. Sahil promised to take Stuti with him to Surat soon after marriage. After marriage, he would work in Surat during weekdays and join Stuti in Mumbai on weekends.

But Stuti did not like this arrangement, and wanted to join Sahil in Surat. Sahil promised they would be together soon, but that did not happen even a year after marriage. All this while Stuti craved to be able to join Sahil in Surat. This weekend arrangement was killing their newlywed chemistry

Finally Sahil realized, that he wasn't doing justice with Stuti by keeping her away and hence, left his job in surat and started working in Mumbai. Stuti was elated at finally being able to spend more time with Sahil. But when they started staying together, they noticed each others quirks and habits, even the bad ones. Initially, these habits were cute, but now they are irritating and often led to fights. They are slowly and unknowingly settling in a typecast marriage. Of course they make up quickly, b'coz both love each other. A baby followed after 2 years, and they are settled into domesticity, no long talks and sunsets, instead fights over who will change the baby's nappy and who will bathe him. Sometimes they have big fights as well. But where earlier, they would make an effort to sort things up, now they take each other for granted and don't bother to clear things up. Both are caught up in their egos.

Not all days are wasted on fighting. Some days are good days, they laugh, play with their daughter, go shopping, while others are wasted on complaints, utter silence, no eye contact, forget physical contact. While earlier when they were not together, they would have long talks through the night, now there are days when they will not speak to each other for days inspite of being in the same room. Where once stuti longed to live forever with Sahil, She now prays that Sahil finds a job in some other city, leaving stuti and their daughter behind, so she could have some peace of mind. She realises now that this is what happens to all marriages after 3 years.

 

thanx rgs,
yup i 2 believe dats what all marriages become after 3 yrs. unless either spouse makes special effort 2 keep away d boredom from creeping in

 

Dnt give up on marriage so easily. It will only make u more frustrated. if u cant rekindle ur marriage find an escape. dnt stay just for ur daughter. Stay for ur ownself