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3 Minute Management Course

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Chitvish, Apr 20, 2007.

  1. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    3 Minute Management Course
    Lesson 1
    A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
    Shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel
    and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the
    next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you
    $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands\n her $800\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back\n upstairs.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, &quot;Who was\n that?&quot; &quot;It was Bob\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>the next door neighbor,&quot; she replies. &quot;Great!&quot; the\n husband says, &quot;did he\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>say anything about the $800 he owes me?&quot;\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cu\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Moral of the story:\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/u\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\> *\n *If you share critical information pertaining to \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>*\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a\n position to\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>*\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>prevent avoidable exposure\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>*\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cstrong\>\u003cb\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" color\u003d\"red\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia;color:red\"\>Lesson 2\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/b\>\u003c/strong\>",1]);//--></SCRIPT>and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800
    and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.
    When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?" "It was Bob
    the next door neighbor," she replies. "Great!" the husband says, "did he
    say anything about the $800 he owes me?"
    Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
    credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to
    prevent avoidable exposure




    To be continued in the next post.....


    Love,
    Chithra.
     
    Loading...

  2. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Lesson 2<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs,\n forcing her\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,\n &quot;Father,\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>remember Psalm 129?&quot; The priest removed his hand. But,\n changing gears, he\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said,\n &quot;Father,\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>remember Psalm 129?&quot; The priest apologized &quot;Sorry sister\n but the flesh is\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>weak.&quot; Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to\n look up Psalm 129. It\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>said, &quot;Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.&quot;\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cu\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Moral of the story:\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/u\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>",1]);//--></SCRIPT>
    A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her
    gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling
    the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father,
    remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he
    let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father,
    remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is
    weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
    On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It
    said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
    Moral of the story:<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb"," If you are\n not well informed in your job, you might miss \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>a great opportunity\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>*\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cstrong\>\u003cb\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" color\u003d\"red\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia;color:red\"\>Lesson\n 3\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/b\>\u003c/strong\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking\n to lunch\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes\n out. The\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Genie says, &quot;I'll give each of you just one wish.&quot;\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Me first! Me first!&quot; says the admin clerk.\n &quot;I want to be in the Bahamas ,\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.&quot; Puff!\n She's gone.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Me next! Me next!&quot; says the sales rep. &quot;I\n want to be in Hawaii\n , relaxing on\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina\n Coladas and\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>",1]);//--></SCRIPT> If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss
    a great opportunity


    To be continued....
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  3. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Lesson 3
    A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch
    when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The
    Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."
    Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas ,
    driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Puff! She's gone.
    Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on
    the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","the love of my life.&quot; Puff! He's gone.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>&quot;OK, you're up,&quot; the Genie says to the\n manager. The manager says, &quot;I want\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>those two back in the office after lunch.&quot;\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cu\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Moral of the story:\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/u\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\> Always let\n your boss have the first say\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\> *\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cstrong\>\u003cb\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" color\u003d\"red\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia;color:red\"\>Lesson\n 4\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/b\>\u003c/strong\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small\n rabbit saw\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>the eagle and asked him, &quot;Can I also sit like you and do\n nothing?&quot; The eagle\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>answered: &quot;Sure, why not.&quot; So, the rabbit sat on the ground\n below the eagle\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit\n and ate\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>it.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cu\>",1]);//--></SCRIPT>the love of my life." Puff! He's gone.
    "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want
    those two back in the office after lunch."
    Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say

    To be continued....
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  4. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Lesson 4
    An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw
    the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle
    answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle
    and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate
    it.
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Moral of the story:\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/u\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\> To be\n sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>very, very high up.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>*\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cstrong\>\u003cb\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" color\u003d\"red\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia;color:red\"\>Lesson\n 5\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/b\>\u003c/strong\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>A turkey was chatting with a bull. &quot;I would love to be able\n to get to the\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>top of that tree,&quot; sighed the turkey, &quot;but I haven't got\n the energy.&quot; Well,\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?&quot; replied the\n bull. They're\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>packed with nutrients.&quot; The turkey pecked at a lump of dung,\n and found it\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of\n the tree.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second\n branch.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>",1]);//--></SCRIPT>Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting

    To be continued....
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  5. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Lesson 5
    A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the
    top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." Well,
    why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. They're
    packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it
    actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
    The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at\n the top of\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of\n the tree.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cu\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Moral of the story:\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/u\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\> ********\n might get you to the top, but it won't keep \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>you there\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>*\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cstrong\>\u003cb\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" color\u003d\"red\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia;color:red\"\>Lesson\n 6\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/b\>\u003c/strong\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the\n bird froze\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying\n there, a cow\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there\n in the\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung\n was actually\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began\n to sing for",1]);//--></SCRIPT>Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of
    the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
    Moral of the story: ******** might get you to the top, but it won't keep
    you there

    To be continued....
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  6. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Lesson 6
    A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze
    and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow
    came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the
    pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually
    thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of\n cow dung,\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>and promptly dug him out and ate him.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cu\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>Moral of the story:\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/u\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>(2) Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>(3) And when you're in deep ****, it's best to keep your mouth\n shut!\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cdiv\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"2\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\>This ends the 3-minute management course.\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\" face\u003d\"Georgia\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:13.5pt;font-family:Georgia\"\> \u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003c/td\>\n \u003c/tr\>\n \n \u003c/table\>\n \u003c/div\>\n \u003cfont size\u003d\"3\" face\u003d\"Times New Roman\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:12.0pt\"\>\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\n \u003cp\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"3\" face\u003d\"Times New Roman\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:12.0pt\"\>\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\u003c/p\>\n \u003c/td\>\n \u003c/tr\>\n\u003c/table\>\n\n\u003c/div\>\n\n\u003c/div\>\n\n\u003cfont size\u003d\"3\" face\u003d\"Times New Roman\"\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-size:12.0pt\"\>\u003c/span\>\u003c/font\>\n\n\u003cdiv align\u003d\"center\" style\u003d\"text-align:center\"\>\u003cfont size\u003d\"3\" face\u003d\"Times New Roman\"\>",1]);//--></SCRIPT>
    joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
    Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung,
    and promptly dug him out and ate him.
    Moral of the story:
    (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
    (2) Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend
    (3) And when you're in deep ****, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
    This ends the 3-minute management course.

    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  7. slgayatri

    slgayatri Bronze IL'ite

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    Chitra
    THese lessons are with great morals..
    Loved all...
    I heard the boss one, in tems of our S/W.
    Its..... two employees and their Manager will be going to have lunch... They saw the lamp, after that first one asks the Alladin, to take him to highest mountains, second one asks him to take him to the beautiful beach in the world... and finally manager asks, these two guys should come to office by the time he finishes lunch... :-D :mrgreen:


    Gayathri.
     
  8. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Gayathri,
    Thanks for joining me here.
    Since I am quite young, I enjoyed the humour in th second, the best !:wink:
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  9. sudhavnarasimhan

    sudhavnarasimhan Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Chitra,
    Madam where did u get hold of these 3 minute management course details....have to pass on to rosh who is doing this course....ha ha!
    And of course dont i know that u are young enough to enjoy the 2nd lesson.....:wink:
    But good ones , have not read most of them!:mrgreen:
     
  10. meenaprakash

    meenaprakash Silver IL'ite

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    Oh, my, my, thank God I'm on time to read such excellent lessons.
    too good, Chitra.

    Love,
     

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