1 year old suddenly crying all the time

thepianist · Jun 2, 2010

Hello ladies,

I'm a working mom to a 13 month old. My MIL cares for my daughter very well while I'm at work. MY daughter has always been a calm child, who would rarely cried. Infact there are times when neighbors have thought she is not at home because they would never hear her crying. All that has suddenly changed since she turned one last month. Now she cries for everything. She wants everything off every shelf at home, wants everything opened, everything spilled. All that is fine since I know she is exploring and learning, but we cant deny her ANYTHING. Distracting her works only for a while and then we're back at square 1. She'll cry if I even go to the loo!! Is this just a phase? Or is this the beginning of tantrums?

Smitha

ShilpaMa · Jun 2, 2010

Smitha,
few things that develop at 13th mnth:
1) molars are rising causing utmost inconvinience.
2) missing mother in day.

Mine was same cranky, this is what I did, took her inside with me in the loo/ bath etc etc, once I reached home, left everything and held her for 1/2 hr till she herself left. Giving her things of her choice, but in barter system taking away dangerous items in a while. She would sleep over me throughout the night and sit up even if I left her for a while.

There was some deep rooted insecurity with her, kids are v v sensitive and they can judge feelings of a person, I wont say more on this forum, but once our parental help stopped, slowly her insecurities went down and she's lot better now... maybe its a passing phase.

tikka · Jun 2, 2010

Hi, It is the age. They do not have the language as yet and yet they want to talk/communicate with their care givers. Also, this is the age where boundaries will be tested. I think the boundaries should be set, gently but firmly.
Yes, she is exploring, but she can do it one at a time without littering the place. If she wants say remote of the shelf and half way through wants to play with the CD covers ask her to help you/mil replace the remote before she can take the CDs. This is for eg and not recommending you to let your child play with remote and CDs.
In the place of repeating Nos and distracting, you can also gently point out that playing with certain things will damage them - like delicate china or fragile glass work.
Do let her explore, but also show her what her boundaries are, which ones she can handle which one she cannot on her own by helping her, teaching her single finger touch as opposed to grabbing.
About being mommy's shadow, I hear you. Almost always all my grooming happened with DH was also home or playing with someone else in another room. It was quite difficult when DS was going through the cling film phase.

Vishalini3 · Jun 6, 2010

This is a phase Toddler age is quite difficult to handle You gently set the rules, keep repeating them endlessly, but no showing long faces or getting angry, a firm eye-eye statement on what is NOT allowed gets into their little head )