Im Confused With My Life

OP, why you bring group of friends here. Call her alone for a coffee out side or some place where only you two can talk. Then tell boldly you dont like behavior. She can call you possessive or whatever, stick with your idea and tell her it hurt you and your married life. Ask her to stay away from your dh. If you behave same way with her husband will she be happy? Tell her if she dont respect your feelings and the boundaries, you will inform her husband. Tell her this talk is between you and her. If she inform this to your dh, you will inform her husband. That's all.

I dont think a true friend, hurt another friend. If she do, she is not your friend.

The above suggestion can be followed only if you are 100% sure about it. If not, it can affect your relationship with your dh. They can also blame you as an insecure or suspicious woman. So be careful and do the homework before confronting her.

But you can confront your husband when kids are not around talk same. Talk only whe you can talk calmly but in an assertive way. Tell him you dont like it . How he will feel if you do the same with her husband? . Ask him how can you make his life better. Tell him you are uncomfortable with their closeness. let him argue Upset or whatever. You need to put a full stop to it. He should respect your feelings.

If you have unhappy married life, think about how you can make it happy. Focus on intimacy and sex life too. Make a happy home. Appreciate good things in him. These are important for men. Its possible to reignite the flame you guys had long back. Take small steps. Most important, make yourself the first priority and take care of yourself in all aspects. Trying for a job is a good idea.

But that's not a reason for any kind of attachment to other woman. If he has problems, he has to tell you.

Staying calm as if nothing happened ,but collecting evidence and then confronting is the best way. If they are serious , they will find ways to hide everything from you if you talk to them without evidence now.

 

Has the other husband noticed anything at all?

Some people seem to act 'cool' having weird friendships and then accusing other people of being backward.

Tell you husband to stop being her knight in the shining armour else you will rip it off. Yes, you seem to be insecure a bit but who isnt?. Be confident and ask difficult questions to these people and dont forget the ' dare you talk shite' look on your face.

 

Why dont you motivate your husband to change company or change place itself?
This is one more trick which i observed from my cousin, she would refer has husband as your brother to me or any other women . My cousin is a decent guy never speaks to any one where as his wife is highly insecure women.

Also try to see if your husband is going to meet your friend or your friends husband. Because some men enjoy other male company.