Name good habits you picked up from DH.

Eandian,

should i say i picked or i unlearned...well after 21 years with this person, i believe the concept of osmosis applies more aptly ..

What i picked..

letting go and accepting that people are just what they are and we cannot change.
if I only list the faults, i cannot find a good person. (kutram parkaiyile sutram illai..)
enjoying the moment
how to really take care of the workers,staff and people who actually matter..be it the caretaker of the building, be it the maid, be it the vendor who visits..today, everyone of them has a smile..so much that when i pass the shops that i don't visit these days been in this place for more than 15 years, they stop what they are doing, and enquire about my health and the kids...
his honesty..it is not that i was not honest before, but being able to be so in trying circumstances like he has been..
he will never lie..


so what i unlearned...
my temper (yeah i did have one..) after seeing the effects of his temper on us.
being uptight.


the list is long.

 

Good, positive thread!!

DH is my role model in professional life. I used to be very sensitive/shy and barely can speak up/contact people, outside of my known circle. DH is extremely organized/very energetic person, and can talk any subject, impress others easily. More or less shaped me up in work/personal life.

- Became thick skinned, outspoken, and good at networking
- Developed, I can do it, attitude and became more confident person.
- Learned good planning skills, think ahead before doing it.
- Still working on my 'lazy me', :rotfl learned to delegate more to him!!
- Learned the mysterious ways of unconditional love

Learned more on human relations.....

- DH tolerance/patience is near zero and for sure, he can't get along with every one (easily, run over others).

Only people know him better can 'decode' his behaviour, what he is up to or follow him. Over time, I learned to understand him, his hyperactive personality or even such a thing exists. His thoughts can be on super highway and for me, as if I haven't started the car, yet.

Learned that I am an above average/normal person. It takes longer for me (in his view) to learn things/nothing wrong in that.

- DH can't relax even a single day/hour (behaves like, what's next? even on our vacations)

Learned to say 'calm down or time out'. More or less, treat him like a big 'kid' at times!! Thank God, he listens when I say, Chillout!

- DH temper as well as the cooling period can be so fast (lightening speed)

Without understanding him, it may seems odd from outside. I can't believe myself, I am the calm one in the family :biggrin2: Yeh, some of my family members are afraid to approach him and more or less becomes silent around him, particularly my co brother in-laws (sister's husbands).

Learned that to make up for that I have to be extra nice around my friends/relatives.

This where my unconditional love for him plays a role :-D

 

This is a nice thread eandian -very positive and has made me think what i've taken from him.

has made me realize my self worth - Made me face very tough situations and never relenting to solve it purposely.

Laughter - Before marriage I was one tight nut , After marriage he has made me one crazy nut. My home actually roars loud with laughter with comedy scenes.When I was newly married - whenever he used to laugh so loud I was like what the hell? and now I have joined in.....

He does have a few more but I have not picked it....habits change hard , hoping in future........

 

hi eandian,

i think this is really a motivational post.....! we see a lot of negativity around us nowadays...but if we just learn to see & appreciate the positive sides of the person whom we live with, i think life will become easier....!

to begin with...these are the things that I remember at the moment....as I have definitely changed as a person ever since i know him....

1) have learnt to be flexible in thinking....i used to have some rigid thinking & sometimes even that which never used to make sense....so he was the one who has taught me that if u stick on to something & dont look for other options, we will continue to live in the same rut!

2) planning ---> this is one thing that I have learnt & still learning...am pretty bad with numbers...& i was not the one who could have long-term plans...but being with him all these years....i am also learning the art of planning things well ahead...and now having a kid, needless to say....planning does help a lot !

3) health care (including exercising!!)---> i would say i hardly used to bother about food & exercise....i was more of a junk foodie....and initially i used to be so rigid about my ways of junk...but now....am so tuned to his ways of food...and have started becoming more conscious abt food !!

4) empathy - i used to have the habit of empathizing....but I learnt from him a lots more..sometimes, in one of my bad days, if i start cribbing....he would definitely keep reminding that not all are as lucky as you are....and sometimes he would go to the extent of speaking abt afghanistan somalia and pakistan people who suffer:drowning...hehehehe...he used to repeat this thing so often that i used to make fun of him as I would know what he will tell...and then my problem becomes nothing !!! ...but on a serious note...yes, I have learnt to become more empathetic...and look beyond wat we have in hand.....

5) simplicity - he is a person who would not use perfumes, chains, watches....he feels so uncomfortable if he uses these !! initially these used to get onto my nerves...but since he is very much thoughtful abt health, all those extra things have taken a second seat in my head !! but he never stops me from using...not that i use makeup...but i love perfumes...and watches & short chains....so obviously he tries to get me these.....

5) cooking --- i would not give full credit to him, but yes...i would say 70% ......i was the typical person who would know only how to boil water as a kid & college goer..:bonk.but later learnt a lots (& I also have many other people to give credit...but since it will digress from this topic...not going into those details).....as i said i was more into junk food...but now....i am really glad to say that its mostly home cooked food...he is a good cook when people at home used to ask me if he can manage on his own, whenever we are apart....i used to grin...and then they would know the reason for my grinning...but now..because of him, i cook well !!! and in the initial years, he was my guinea pig for everything that i make :biggrin2:.....and now, we have special food almost every friday night....actually we both love variety food...but earlier i didnt know how to make...now i can make...sometimes when I happen to talk to my SIL on some fridays, suddenly she would ask me what is special for the night....then i would realise that the entire family knows we have this habit.... & thats why they are asking...hehehehehe

6) and cooking reminds me of another point of his --- he is very encouraging ---> in whatever i do, he tries to encourage me...and i think that helped me to learn more...and he still wants me to be more aggressive in thought (in the positive sense!!) ....

wow...nice thread eandian ! i seriously didnt think i would keep writing like this...thought-provoking post ! this post will definitely motivate people to come up with points to have a good feel....

would luv to see more !

 

He taught me a lot. But in a hard way, but definitely if he was not there, I wouldn't have been in this position.

1. I learnt from him to be cool, even others are aggressive and yelling at me

2. Learnt to be independant. I used to expect him to do many things for me, but now, I do things on my own. I manage most of the stuff at home starting from paying bills to homely budget planning and maintaining etc.


I feel these two things are very great things that I learnt from him and changed my life in many ways.

 

Very nice thread

I learned from my DH:-
Think positive in all situation.
Do not take unwanted tensions.
Have positive vibes N spread same.
Keep patience.
Be straighforward as you cannot keep everyone happy always.
Many many more things blessed to have him in my life..