Partially Moved on.. But Still

Hi Black beauty,
It is natural to have such feelings.. I was married but only for short while to..Now after 6mons of divorce i am bit ok with it..I also feel emarassed if some one asks abt marriage.. i have later told some ppl tht i am divorced ..now no one really asks me..time is a great healer and one needs to make lot of effort to get things healed..
u have given your effort for the marriage work he and his family has not done that..end of the day they are loosing a nice lady..you are still young take some time and search for another guy through parents and brothers..probably in future u might get a loving partner and a nice family.. i am just living with tht hope..In any case keep saving money .. one needs to be financially independent to face the hardships in life..u are already doing it..
just keep going to temples ..i am really finding peace with it..

 

One of the most famous fictional characters in all of literature is Miss Havisham in Dickens’ ‘Great Expectations’ (she has her own Wikipedia entry). She is the prototype spinster, who, after being abandoned at the altar by her lover, retreats into her mansion, never goes out and turns into a bitter, old witch, ceding her life to decay. There’s a lesson to be learned here.
You had a certain vision of the life you wanted. This has been thwarted at least temporarily. How you react to this is up to you. Anxiety and self-doubt are normal, but the point is to not let the negative feelings dominate. The people around you will take their cues from your attitude towards a failed marriage and divorce. If you are confident and accepting, if you project the idea that while it may be a setback, it is not a soul-destroying one, they will respond to you positively. If you project an image of divorce as a personal failure, they will respond with hushed whispers behind your back: “oh, poor girl – I feel really sorry for her”. Would you not have them think rather: “she is so confident, educated, independent, successful! What a sparkling personality! Why would anyone want to let her go”? This is up to you. Note that you are already almost there – you have a good job, you are independent, you have your own house, you made a decision to take better care of yourself. The courage you need is already there! Why not follow through, for your own sake?
Always keep in mind that life is very short. Time is precious. Don’t waste your life on regrets. I know, of course, that this is easier said than done, but my wish for you is that you go out and meet life with enthusiasm and a more suitable Prince Charming will come out to meet you. No regrets, no fear, no retreat.

 

hi
Dont worry. Everything will be alright as time passes. You are working, independant and tha is a big , very big achievement. There are so many women who are stuck in abusive marriages but they cant go out because of financial dependance and other things.Tell me what is the use of being in such marriges? only to have a married tag, to live life in a hell.
Do things that like you. there are so many travel companies , visit new places with those tours. Or go with your family to visit new places.have you been to delhi, dalhausi, kolkata or abroad? Save money and go on tours.
Explore Himalayas.
Buy clothes. Have you bought at a time 10 dresses? Visit malls , look for discounts and buy dresses.
Learn new language, try new receipes with help of internet. What do you like most to eat? Icercream , chocolates. Eat them. Save your money in PPF , fds.
learn driving.
FIND out what do you need to make a progress in your job, career ?
In all this , time will fly.
Even after this , you feel empty then try to adopt a child and give her your love.
Remember marriage is not a solution to spend life.
There are so many other things which will give you real happiness.

 

Me no Bengali. But like this song and meaning:

Ekla Cholo Re - Kishore Kumar - YouTube
Nikhil Kulkarni's Blog: Ekla Chalo re

 

Hi,
You have done a good thing..separating from such a person before you had kids and you didn't resign your job.Don't feel guilty about anything...move on with life, good that you have a place of your won, going out and meeting people. As we think society is not that bad. I know a lady who separated from her her husbnad 20 years after marriage....that too at the insitence of her 18 and 14 year old daughters. Their point is why should she suffer? She was nervous initially..but later continued with her job, got the girls educated, they are married...she did her Ph.D at the age of 50. Everyone respects her so much. When she could do so much at an advanced age..why not you? You are young...a lot of life ahead. Have a good circle of friends, pursue your hobbies, you have a job...I am sure you would come across someone with whom you can share your life and it would be wonderful. Good luck to you.

 

Hugs dear!


Look at these things seperately from being 'Divorsed'.. What happened in the past (Marriage n stuff) is a thing of past.. You have gone through it and all that remains is a memory..

But the current looks perfect..
You are single, you are totally independent, you are concentrating on your fitness and taking care of yourself..

As a human being you are self-sufficient.. Don't ever think about social norms.. According to me, your life isn't missing anything.. When time comes, other things like love and family will fall in place..

 

Hi friend,
Please know that u r not facing this alone. I'm with u. There are many of us in a similar or worse situations. We'll pull this together. Atleast u r about to be divorced. But, I m in a terrible state, where I love my husband, but he does not, and he wants me to file a divorce.
If u reside in Chennai, let me know. We can meet up.