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Problem with Husbands behaviour

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by anonymous007, Feb 3, 2011.

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  1. Feb 5, 2011 #11
    SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Strange Behaviour of my husband

    I have merged your threads to ensure continuity of the discussion.
     
    SriVidya75, Feb 5, 2011
    SriVidya75, Feb 5, 2011
    #11
  2. Feb 5, 2011 #12
    rose8282

    rose8282 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Dear anonymous....how long has it been since your marriage?Your husband does behave strangely...I think the marriage was enforced on him,not sure.Ask him why he behaves this way and does he really want to be away from you?
    I'm sorry to say this,but if your husband does not consider you his wife,you cannot force him.Speak to him frankly and do not go for kids until you know his intentions.being angry at someone is one matter,but denying someone of the right of being a wife is ridiculous.be strong...if you are married recently,act quickly.sorry if I said something that might hurt you.
     
    rose8282, Feb 5, 2011
    rose8282, Feb 5, 2011
    #12
  3. Feb 5, 2011 #13
    anonymous007

    anonymous007 New IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Hi,

    I asked him several times, I talk to him quiet openly just recently also I asked him if you dont like me or dont want our marriage to stand than pls let me know he says nuthing like that. I dont understand is he planning something in his mind, if so what could be the plans.
     
    anonymous007, Feb 5, 2011
    anonymous007, Feb 5, 2011
    #13
  4. Feb 5, 2011 #14
    anonymous007

    anonymous007 New IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    It has been 3 yrs since we got married
     
    anonymous007, Feb 5, 2011
    anonymous007, Feb 5, 2011
    #14
  5. Feb 5, 2011 #15
    Tridev

    Tridev Silver IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    He does not want sepeartion, if you insist he will resist. Some people just dont know what they want , they neither live or let live in peace. The actions of your husband does not show he is reasoanable towards you.

     
    Tridev, Feb 5, 2011
    Tridev, Feb 5, 2011
    #15
  6. Feb 5, 2011 #16
    JyothiD

    JyothiD New IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Dear anonymous i am the silent reader of IL from a long time.this is the first post i am replying to. i can totally understand what ur going through,because i was in ur shoes 11 years back.My Ex-husband used to behave the same way.no at all interested in me,not even sitting near me.He wants all the time his parents to be with him. i did not understand the reason for 1 year,later i came to know that he is impotent. He was forced to get married by his parents.

    i just want you to think from that area,may be he has any probelms like that.
     
    JyothiD, Feb 5, 2011
    JyothiD, Feb 5, 2011
    #16
  7. Feb 6, 2011 #17
    anonymous007

    anonymous007 New IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Hi

    Thanks for responding. I do not think he is impotent it is just that he is doing wantedly. But in general also he is not interested in me only when he is in mood that too once in a blue moon. I sometimes doubt if he is having any affair or something. Here Iam on this dependent visa which is even more frustrating for me. Iam trying to go to some community college though but still when I be at home i mean it is pissing me off . I be so nice to him sometimes even I get tired he wants his family to be treated like VIP. He doesnt appreciate even once for what I do never get satisfied with my taking care. His family also never ever support me i mean even a bit. He is a nice person but don't know why he does like this sometimes especially when his family members go back from here. He behaves as if I disrespected them n all. I mean he doesn't even think consider me as important as his family in life. I mean even I want to have my own family have kids . Why he is like that My parents say what am I doing here with out actually having happy married life (u know what I mean) they are supportive my mom says decide something rather wasting my life but still I just want to give some time. If he is like this as usual than I think I have to take a step. Its three yrs High time. I feel like everything my age etc. has been wasted. I dont have friends also here other than my cusins in different states here . He enjoys if I get frustrated or look like depressed. That is why iam trying to be happy myself. I mean sometimes pretend . If I don't than I will go mad here. I don't know what to do sometimes feel like being independent and earn and have my own work permit..
     
    anonymous007, Feb 6, 2011
    anonymous007, Feb 6, 2011
    #17
  8. Feb 6, 2011 #18
    Priya16

    Priya16 IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Dear,

    I feel your situation much deeper than what you know?

    How many times did your in-laws visited you in these 3 years of marraige?
    How was your life when your in-laws not around?

    3 years is really high time.I don't even see,he is treating you as his wife.Leave his people aside.

    Does he discuss at least household planning or check your interests?

    Do you guys have any friends?Don't think that his work life making him stress.That's the excuse for the marriage life.

    Your problem is much deeper.Why don't you invite your mother and see how things go.May be your would get understanding of your married life.
     
    Priya16, Feb 6, 2011
    Priya16, Feb 6, 2011
    #18
  9. Feb 8, 2011 #19
    anonymous007

    anonymous007 New IL'ite

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Hi Priya,

    We are good in absence of in laws his mom visired once and his brother in these three yrs. One thing I really do not understand is he behaves like touch me not everyday like if I sleep next to him and close to him he turns the other side n all. Iam getting frustrated, big time. I also asked him why you doin this he does not respond and just stays calm. I also ask him if you don't want this relationship please tell me frankly let us seperate he doesnt respnd for that too. I mean any guy in the world how can he avoid his wife and wants to sleep away and completely refuse if I just touch him
     
    anonymous007, Feb 8, 2011
    anonymous007, Feb 8, 2011
    #19
  10. Feb 8, 2011 #20
    Priya16

    Priya16 IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: Husband is threatening

    Dear,

    Myself don't have knowledge on the impotent and only learned here.You think he is not impotent but you really don't know.
    Lot of women are struggling with that issue here.Really looks like some issue with him.I really don't know how you can bring that up.May be other ladies could help here.
    Men(some men who had issues with wife or vise versa),can fight with women in the morning and can do all kind of abuse but they really wanted sexual life in the night.
    Your case is totally difference.I only think that he had some issues and you have to figure it out.
     
    Priya16, Feb 8, 2011
    Priya16, Feb 8, 2011
    #20
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