please advice

vibhakar · Jan 12, 2011

Hi everyone,

I need advice from you .

Me and my husband fight very often. I have been married for 3 years. Initially, when i came my husband used to always stuck with laptop . I always felt lonely. Then i had many allergies, problems. He even used to watch **** stuff on laptop. Though, this would bother me but i used to think, i am not well so even used to feel guilty. He had lots of work pressure and used to come late. I always felt very lonely. There were not many friends. Even if i used to cry, he wont sit next to me. Instead, he would sit outside on laptop. I would cry all night long and sleep. We started lit bit of communication and started telling him that i want his company.

He also started understanding little bit. Recently,
I am pregnant and few days back started having pain and was not feeling well. I told him many times to sit near me. He sat too and even did cooking stuff. but quietly kept laptop in other room. when i knew, i felt very bad and asked him. He said, ya if you may sleep or early morning he can watch. I felt very irritated on thi. because fro last one month. i have been continously telling him to spent time with me instead of laptop. i just felt, that if I am so unwell, then also his mind is more towards laptop.
We didnt talked to each other for 2 days . he also didnt showed any care.
We just spoke after 2 days.
He said he bcoz we cant have sex often he need to watch stuff in order to satisfy himself.
I dont know how shd i feel.
What do you guys think?
Thanks

roses_bloom · Jan 20, 2011

I can understand how this can be bothersome to you and you might feel like the laptop and his activities online are replacing you - these are very normal feelings... however, try not to take this personally! It's pretty common for guys to fantacize and to use the internet to feed those - it's not necessarily meaning that he does not love you and does not want to be with you.

Since you are pregnant, try not to worry about it too much, its not a very big deal and no online site can ever replace the love and nurtuing of a wife... she enjoy your marriage, your pragnancy, and relax. This is not a very big deal and not something to lose sleep over.

Rakhii · Jan 20, 2011

Vibhakar, I think he is not really understanding what you are going through. I would be livid too if my husband would rather watch **** than sit with me.
Your body and your mind are going through lot of changes. He is not going through it, so he doesnt know. For him to feel involved in your pregnancy, I think it is important that he attends to every doctors appointment with you. If possible find a book which will help him understand you.

reverie · Jan 20, 2011

Vibhakar,

Your DH needs to growup...It is an addiction...Tell him he has it...The next time he takes his laptop...go and sit with him...hopefully he will change...Also find out from your Doctor till which day you can be intimate...Try to be happy dear...