Low Self Esteem ??

CW,

I find myself in these situations pretty often. When I was a teen, I often wondered about it. Gradually I realized that people around us feel very intimidated when they see a confident girl...a girl who can hold her own, who is not afraid to ask questions, who is not afraid to say the truth, who is not afraid to stand up for herself, who is not afraid to speak her mind....a girl who can really THINK....

It is very easy to nod your head and say "Yes" but very difficult to convince others that what you are saying MAKES sense.

I have read some of your postings in this forum and my opinion about YOU is that you do believe in yourself and you are a very reasonable person.

Sometimes I come across very inteliigent people and I don't always agree with what they say, but you can agree to DISAGREE and still respect each other. But sometimes I come across people who don't know how to handle me and try to pull my leg. I feel pity for such people.....I just thank God everyday that I am not ONE in that crowd.....

If you think and you consider yourself an individual first, you are SPECIAL...If others have problems with you, clearly it is THEIR problem. They just don't know how to handle a girl who THINKS and CAN HOLD HER OWN.

My suggestion is that you should not waste your time with people who are stupid.....Spend your time talking to people who genuinely love and care for you.....

Take care. I know you are a wonderful wonderful person(I can see some really warm replies to your thread here and you certainly know that you are SPECIAL, don't you????)

A big bear hug to you....

Luv,

--Bubai

 

Srividya,

I read your responses/replies to the questions in the different sections of this forum and I must say that your replies are really nice and to the point. I am really impressed.

Your maturity level is indeed commendable. I love the way your put your words.

I understand that we are not allowed to share e-mail IDs here and I don't see any other way of letting you know this....so just writing it here....

CW, hope you don't mind....

Take care girls!!!

--Bubai

 

dear Canwait (btw, can wait for what ? what are you waiting for ? LOL just kidding),

yes you are arrogant, headstrong/adamant, problem creator etc whatever you have stated about yourself is true. yes you have an attitude problem.

but at the same time you are innocent. you trust people blindly. not a cunning person. very carefree or rather careless in identifying people. intelligent but still ignorant. more like a spoilt brat but a good one. very good at heart but not able to express rightly. may be your sun sign is pisces or taurus.

before that .....
i am not a regular in this website and neither do i read each and every post in IL, one day i came across this thread "why women are asked to compromise... ", while i was reading i felt that the thread had deviated from the actual post etc ... you know the remaining part of the story.

that was the first time i came across you (you were supporting Mal ). the first thing that came to my mind was "this girl will face hell a lot of trouble from people. she doesn't know to identify character/true nature of people. talks without thinking. i hope she stays safe from in-laws and marital problems". later in the posts you had mentioned about marriage certificate etc. so i was like "thank god at-least her married life is going well". you also had a work related problem. some VISA issue. i was like "i am not surprised. i knew this would happen with her".

day before yesterday was my day off. so was browsing the famous icyspicy thread . just posted a reply and later was reading all the posts in the thread. was shocked to see you mention about your ex etc. i didn't know that you were separated. so really very sorry about that.

now coming back to the topic ....

you are arrogant in the sense that you dont think before you talk/do. first you do something and then you think (or dont think) about it. due to which you face problems from people because you end up doing what people consider arrogant. (but you think - 'i was only honest then why people are blaming me). you are right but you put it too vaguely that people misunderstand.

you are headstrong because you think what you did was correct. though it may be wrong. but still you are not able to think from an neutral angle. this makes you think 'what i did was correct and i will stick to it.

you are a problem creator because you create problems. infact you not only create problems but also invite trouble for yourself with your own behaviour/talk. you dont need anybody else to create problem for you. you yourself are enough. you dont think what is good for you what is bad for you etc. you just go by a decision and then regret.

my point is you think you are honest but actually you are arrogant because you are not able to differentiate between the two. you think you are mature but actually you are very very childish. the reason i say you are childish is because you are very much like kalidas who was cutting the branch on which he was sitting though he was cutting the branch superbly. you are just like him. but just not aware of it. you are more like a rebel. yes you like being a rebel/good rebel but unable to understand that it has its own consequences.

your siblings and family should have said this to you long ago. may be they did tell you but you never listened to them because of your rebel nature. at-least now on act wisely.

cheers.

 

OMG! ananthy.
Can you give an example of why you are labelling CanWait as arrogant? What example have you read that makes you think she is arrogant?

I dont know. This is an online forum so we can only go with what people have posted, but I have interacted with CW for a while and havent felt that she was arrogant.

 

Arrogant, to me, means believing you are superior, better, more important than everyone else, and trumpeting this attitude loudly and often. Canwait, I don't think you are at all arrogant, according to that definition, at least not on these forums.

 

Ananthy

I really had hard time understanding what you wanted to say. because you started with saying this

and ended up saying this to OP

Did you mean CW is arrogant because she stands up for what she beleives in i.e being honest??? could you please elaborate on your response to her so that all of us can understand, as now your post seems like you are picking on CW and I hope thats not the case..let us know please. Thanks!

 

something abt CW has ticked off ananthy. Even I'd like to know why the outpouring? I understand ananthy was trying to help CW by giving her advice, but whats the context, I'd like to know.

Can u pls. explain ananthy?

 

Even I saw Ananthy's post and was surprised.

Actually, I like Canwait. I'm definitely on 'Team Canwait'. :thumbsup

 

Wow....what an ambiguous post by Anathy!!! I am totally baffled by her words....How can someone know about the different facets of a woman's personality just by reading some posts here in these public forums?