Want to give baby for adoption.

Dearie,
You seem to have made up your mind about giving away the baby. Yes, most adoption agencies here in the US do have Indian couple waiting to adopt Indian babies. You can do some research online.

But the question still is- Without consulting your family, how can you just take a decision on your own? What if your son's Grandparents want to bring him up? Why punish them? You and your husband might not want your son, but the grandparents might want their Grandson.
It is very natural for parents to expect grandchildren a few years after their kids get married, its not fair to say they forced you to have kids. Not in this day and age.

How do you know you are not depressed( as you say in a previous post)? Have you seen a
mental health specialist? Have they said you should give away the child, and thats the only solution to your problem?

Please don't take my questions as intrusive, but a child belongs to a family too, and because you are angry with your Mom for something trivial, does not mean you should punish her by not talking to her, and giving away her grandchild.

There are very few problems that cannot be solved by discussion. Sit down and talk to your family.
In spite of everything if you feel adoption is best for your son, you can go ahead.

 

hello 1234aaaa
pls reconsider this issue
U've given birth for ur parents sake - ok I agree
Why dont u try to love ur son atleast now for the baby's sake.
After all its not his fault to get denied with parents' love.
Aren't u trusting ur relationship with ur hubby lifelong
I surely doubt in that. Is ur relationship with ur hubby normal?
or are u in the idea to get seperated?
pls reconsider. There are still 85% marriages happening in this world without love. We start loving after marriage only.
We girls are like water. We take up whatever shape we r poured in.
So pls try to love the kid. I think u don show up ur love towards the kid.
Even if the roadside baby, we stop to kiss them.
I felt so precious when I gave birth to my son.
Though I vigourously wanted a girl baby, when I gave birh to a son, i strongly doubted whether I can love the same way as to a girl baby
But after 5 yrs, I swear that my dear son has changed my thoughts altogether.
I wish u a lovely motherhood. pls enjoy & fulfil ur motherhood.
Give that love to that sweet child.
all the best
-vinnyvishy

 

1234aaaa,

I just have one request.
Please have a look at the threads in this forum.
Maybe it would give you a fair idea on what pains women endure for a child.

Fertility & Trying to Conceive - IndusLadies

Thanks!

 

Possibilities many new moms would feel something like what you feel. but we would at least accept there is something wrong and seek professional help. looks like you are stubborn with your point. you could have shown this mulishness when you tried to get pregnant or at least before bringing the little thing into this world.

like Raj said, did your doctor really ask you to go ahead with adoption, as if thats the only way of getting out of this problem? pls seek good medical help.. and you will soon love your baby like you love your... say, husband or like how the rest of the world love their children.

Run your baby's palm spread over your cheeks, face and all over.. give a tight kiss on his neck, tummy, feet.. Pass my love to your baby. my prayers for him.

 

i had to read the post twice to belive my eyes
are you kidding or do you really have this intention?
just because some one wants you to get an innocent life to the world you did ?and you call this pressure?
if your mom asks you to kill your dh out of presusre to you do it?
please for god sake recheck what you have written
check if it makes sense to you
are you a kid common you are playing with a small babys life now?
you are so very immature

 

Oh my god!
What is this 1234aaa?
I felt shocked after reading this thread.Baby is the precious gift from god.How many ladies are walking with tears on their eyes when they are going to the public places(seeing the babies around).

Dont be selfish.How many ladies are taking care of their baby after their divorce.They are struggling lot in their life to upbring the baby.

Nothing is impossible in life.You try to love your baby.You can do it.Dont fix your mind that , i dont like this baby.please try to love him.

 

Dear,

I am totally shocked and confused reading your thread. But is your decision based on your relationship you share with your husband. Reading your posts i dont feel you share a healthy relationship with your husband. What is his stand on the entire issue. He too wishes to give away the child? Or is it like you both dont want a child in the future too.
If you feel its based on current circumstance or any health issue you can leave the kid with either your parents or his parents. might be in future you realise your self and may be fond of the child. think twice before giving it for adoption.You might never get a chance to see your kid again.

 

Hi,


It has been ages since I have written in IL.But breezing through your post made me write. I am a mother of two kids. I do not want to advise you on "how shocking your behaviour is, or how to try and love your child" etc since you have received such responses from a lot of concerned ILites and not responded in a positive way. All I can tell you is, if at all you want to give up your child to someone, please do it to your immedite family(like your mom, sis etc) so that one fine day when you wake up from this haze and realise what an atrocious act you have done and you want to cuddle him and want him back, at least you would get one more chance!

In the meanwhile, go on a vacation with your husband and baby. Try and see if you can be a part of his growing up which is so precious, it never comes back!

Purnima

 

Hi,

I was quite pushed to write here. Unlike all the other posters - I say - please give away at the earliest. Find about a good agency in your locality or in India and give away your baby. Dont even think of giving it to near and dear relatives, friends - because I feel the whole relationship factor should not be disturbed after you give. I agree with Nitha J here.

If YOU do not want to have a baby - then, you should have been strong and stubborn enough to not get around making one. If you can be pushed by your mom to get a baby, then I think you simply cannot handle a baby on your own. Another thing is the stubborn YOU seems to have given in to your mom, but cannot give in to your baby. Anyways lady, it is your choice. There are a million gjaya's waiting there to hold your child. God Bless you Jaya

A good thing to do in between would be spend some time with the little one. Make a effort to fall in love, trust me - it is not so tough. That way, you will at least have the satisfaction of being around the baby in joy. Kisses to the little one.