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Book That Is Helping My Marriage

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Penelope, Feb 9, 2021.

  1. Penelope

    Penelope Bronze IL'ite

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    This book is called "First Kill all the Marriage Counselors" by Laura Doyle

    This book has helped me so much I just want to tell everyone about it. I believe that anyone can benefit from reading or listening to the audio book. The author interviewed multiple women with successful marriages and took their common advice and developed a sort or guide book for how we as wives should compose ourselves in marriage so that we feel loved and our husbands feel respected. I didn't realize how much I was dragging our marriage down until I reflected and started trying out some of the habits and phrases she recommends using. I think her book is such a good balance of the woman practicing self care and honoring her needs but also creating an environment of respect for her husband. I am so glad I found this book and I can already see my relationship improving.

    The book was so good for me that I just want to tell everyone about it.:) I listened to the audiobook while doing chores. Soo convenient!
     
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  2. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 IL Hall of Fame

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    Looks like an interesting read.. I'm definitely going to try.. Thanks for sharing.. :)
     
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  3. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    Interesting. Where can I read this book?thanks dear
     
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  4. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks so much!
    I saw it on Amazon!
     
  5. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    Google for this book. I noticed that its preview is available in pdfdrive site or you can buy it from Amazon
     
  6. Penelope

    Penelope Bronze IL'ite

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    I listened using the app for audiobooks.com but I am sure you can find it on Amazon or Audible.
     
  7. hrastro

    hrastro Platinum IL'ite

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    It is downloadable from internet from pdfdrive kind of websites
     
  8. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I read the book around the time it was published in 2015. The author makes some valid points such as how women try to control things even after delegating a task, women are the ones who set the tone in a marriage and in the home. There were specific steps in the book that I could have adopted to be a better and more pleasant person to be around.

    But overall, the book had an undertone I didn't care much for. To start off, the title of the book:
    First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life. I have mixed feelings about a business or professional who advocates the annihilation of all competition, : ) even in jest or for dramatic effect. : ) Next, the terms "cherished" and "adored" are too archaic for my liking. They remind of a Regency romance...complete with the wayward heroine finally seeing the error of her ways.

    The titles of other books by Laura Doyle are:
    - The Surrendered Wife: A Practical Guide To Finding Intimacy, Passion and Peace (2001)
    - The Surrendered Single: A Practical Guide to Attracting and Marrying the Man Who's Right for You (2002)
    - The Empowered Wife: Six Surprising Secrets for Attracting Your Husband's Time, Attention, and Affection (2017)

    The "Kill the marriage counselors" book is great for tips on how to achieve, create and maintain peace in your marriage. It is up to each woman to examine if the cost of arriving at that peace is worth it.

    OP, I am not dissing the book. It is definitely worth a read and has some points that will help and are worth trying. It is up to the reader (or listener) to identify those points. But overall, I found it bordering on the notion of the "submitted wife" that can be found in certain religious groups and is actively and voluntarily practiced by even modern women.

    P.S. I found a 2015 thread on the topic. :facepalm:
     
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  9. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    I just scanned through the book. It confirms the traditional expectations and roles a woman is supposed to play. Exactly confirming that woman is the back bone of the family.

    Positives are that the author clearly say this book is for cases where there is no abuse,adultery or addictions, applies to reasonably good person who is now a distant husband. The importance of self love, finding your own happiness, having a life of your own, the role of respect , tone and style of interaction etc highlighted. Even though I can't agree with all points, I think this book may help to introspect what's ( eg: wife's actions/behavior) driving husband away and his need for respect/ admiration. However its up to the reader to decide whats best for them.
     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2021
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  10. hrastro

    hrastro Platinum IL'ite

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    The 2015 thread was very interesting !

    Now I HAVE to read the book just to get outraged and have some fun discussions with my DH :beer-toast1:
     
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