When a poster turns into a troll and exchanges with him/her turn abusive?

Dear Tanuja

You need to see your sister's problems through her eyes and not through your eyes. What seems to be a big issue to you may not be so big to her and vice versa.

For someone, staying in an unhappy marriage is more peaceful than separation and facing other associated issues. They have such mind set and such a set of people to deal with in their routine life. For some, it is far better to leave the hopeless spouse and lead a single life. They may have support system in place where they life. We as virtual friends do not know what actually happens, rather we generalize most of the issues based on our Indian context.

I am slightly different from my sister and totally different from my cousin. But we are from one family and brought up by the same people by almost the same way. But its individual emotions.

For instance... One of my friend had committed suicide for a love failure at the age of 22... Someone can say they have no sympathy on her for doing such foolish act... Even I dont feel sad either. But it doesnt mean the case is true.
Similarly one of my other friend has cheated on her boy friend to marry an American citizen... Both were studied at the same college, belong to same religion and belong to same area. If both come and post almost same issue (that is problem with boy friends) we virtual posters are going to provide almost similar responses... But the seriousness of the issue and the readiness to accept solutions are totally upto the OPs.

Here no one can force or rate the OP based on their willingness to accept our advises. We must let them do what they think is right... Just because we offered so many advises, or we wasted our times and involved too much in their case, doesnt mean we have the right to force the OP to follow us.

In any abusive (not only physical, other type of emotional abuses also) marriage, we expect the OP to separate from her spouse as much as possible (given the spouse seems unchanged for a long time). I happened to read a story from "life without spouse forum" that a lady decided to divorce her abusive husband and got re married after sometimes as per the advises given by her friends and relatives. But here her case has gotten worse and she had to divorce the new monster again. But this has taken so much time like 10-12 yrs as she tried a lot to work it out since its her second chance. But the monster didnt change... Now she was claiming that she could have waited this long to change her first one as he was not that bad like the second one? What's the use????

 

Tanjam30 :clap very very rightly said

 

Since we now have plenty of suggestions here to take into consideration, this thread is being closed.