whats your hair care regimen

First, you need to start with a good haircut. Don't be sentimental-have the stylist take off as much of the old growth at the ends as you feel comfortable with. This means much of the broken, split, and frizzy fried ends! Your hair should look better immediately (once you get over the loss of length).
My hair varies between midback and waist length, and is generally healthy-looking. I get a trim (usually about 1 inch) every three four months. I use a mild shampoo and a light conditioner (my hair is oily), and oil maybe once every two-three weeks. Rinse with cool water, then comb with a comb with wide, round teeth. I don't work, so I can let the hair airdry (I live in Colorado, which is very cold), and if I need to go out with damp hair, I braid it loosely and wear a hat.
Blow drying and heat styling are very damaging to hair, so if you must, use a heat protectant spray before styling or drying.