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Surprise gifts between husband & wife

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by SallyR, Nov 3, 2010.

  1. SallyR

    SallyR Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Friends,

    My husband and I have stopped giving each other surprise gifts few years ago. We would buy gifts for family & friends and appreciate getting gifts from them. When it comes to gifts between us, we like to know exactly what we’re getting.

    During our early stages of marriage we have given each other surprise gifts but gradually we’ve stopped doing that. We both have very different taste, so when it comes to occasions when we need to gift each other like birthdays we just discuss and buy exactly what the other person wants. I choose mine and he would choose his...both of us are happy.

    Do you think it’s important to give each other surprise gifts? Love to know what you guys think about this!

    S R
     
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  2. lavii

    lavii Gold IL'ite

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    sally
    i love taking and giving gifts . Initially we used to get costly gifts and surprise each other but sometimes it so happens either one may not like it and goes wasted or unused..for courtesy sake sometimes we use it but then No..so since we realised we are careful and get gifts even now but make sure other person likes it..so we are choosing stuff that we are longing to buy for a while and stop because of budget issue or some other prob and choose that to be a surprise gift
     
  3. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    My wife is very much fond of different coloured / shaped ladies' handbags. Once in an year or so (not necessarily in birthdays ) I buy a handbag and gift it to her. She values it much.

    But, I , do not enjoy, when she gives gift to me. She tried that, but when I told that , I do not feel appreciated, by she giving a gift to me. Then, she stopped giving gifts to me. (What I need her to do to me, for me feeling appreciated is beyond the purview of this thread.......hence I do not go into that topic).

    As she continues to enjoy getting a surprise gift from me, once in a while, I continue to give surprise gift to her...............mostly it will be handbags..........and sometimes short kurtis also. Buying a short kurti , in her absence is easy. I just go to the shop and choose a "S" (short) sized kurti, which invariably suits her.

    On an average I give her a surprise gift once / twice in a year.
     
  4. sita2223

    sita2223 Bronze IL'ite

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    Personally, I love to give and receive gifts. Surprise gifts are my favorite kind. My DH was not too much into gifts, esp surprise gifts. I used to nag, nag, nag him. Finally he is getting the hang of it. :thumbsup

    In recent past, he gave me - flowers, Harry Potter goodies, Ben&Jerry's icecream, shirts, earrings and souvenirs from Canada, etc. Lovin' it!!!
     
  5. cinderella06

    cinderella06 Gold IL'ite

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    I always like surprise gifts...(my mom always say any empty box with gift paper will make my daughter happy)..mostly it happens on special days..he gives me more surprises comparing to me..latest is "ARE YOU AFRIDE OF DARK" book..nothing special occation..but the day become special when i get the book package from the mail box..
    Upto me thay are little expression of love..:gift
     
  6. RagaPrasanna

    RagaPrasanna Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Sally - I should thank you for starting this thread.. I suddenly remembered how long its been since I gave my DH a surprise gift. The last one was in July on his bday. So I just completed ordering a gift for him online..and here I am posting a reply to your thread :)

    My DH likes surprises and so do I.
     
  7. SallyR

    SallyR Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks for all of your replies :2thumbsup:. I can see that all of you ladies (including IG’s wife) like surprise gifts. I don’t think I’m an exception to that; it’s just we never been able to get exactly what the other wants:hide:.
    Ours is a love-cum-arranged marriage and we used surprise each other with silly cute gifts before and for a while after the marriage. Then gradually it changed to useful things (like clothes, perfume, etc). That’s when our difference in taste started to affect. What I choose for him won’t be to his liking and vice versa. He would buy me something thinking that I would like it...I do try to use them but then gradually stop using it because it was not in my taste. We then slowly stopped doing that. If he wants to get me something, he’ll just take me to the shop and let me choose.
    After reading your posts; I feel maybe, it’s time to restart it. I’m going to try and get him something he likes...it’s not going to be easy. When I do come up with something that I think he’ll like I’m going to surprise him with it. Next time he wants to get me something I am going to ask him to surprise me and hope it turn out to be a good one.
    :cheers
    S R
     
  8. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks for all of your replies . I can see that all of you ladies (including IG’s wife) like surprise gifts. I don’t think I’m an exception to that

    Yes, Sally. That is true. Probably 99 out of 100 would enjoy when a gift is given to them, by their loved one.

    I’m going to try and get him something he likes...it’s not going to be easy. When I do come up with something that I think he’ll like I’m going to surprise him with it

    Well Sally. Nothing wrong about the idea. But, before that, why don’t you have an open talk with him, whether he really enjoys when some one gives a surprise gift to him. Why do I say this ? It is because, with men, it can be different with different men. There are men who enjoy when they are given a surprise gift. There are men, who may not enjoy it., rather they may think as a funny kids’ game.
    Your man may like being gifted…………..or he may not. With men, the yearning for getting a gift is NOT as uniform as women.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2010
  9. cinderella06

    cinderella06 Gold IL'ite

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    Thats really interesting..new to me..well i'll keep in mind:thumbsup
     
  10. swasa

    swasa Senior IL'ite

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    Surprise gifts?? Oh I love to have and give... but... but... but...
    I always wanted my husband to surprise me with a bonquet of flowers... I even mentioned it... he says they look happier on plants and god idols... not on dining table:bonk
    I wanted to surprise him with some gift... he says 'surprise me with tastiest dal and tomato rasam'!!:drowning
    Well, I love his simplicity.
     

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