Maybe not as a kid, but as an adult, I don't like it when someone looks at my plate. Especially when someone stares when I am eating. Be it a restaurant or cafe. I had some unpleasant experiences at home with my ILs in the past. At crowded places its even more worse. The look on the faces of people waiting to be seated makes me immediately leave. Are they judging the person by what they are eating? Do they do it to be seated quickly? In Indian setup usually women are expected to eat after men finish. Yes its changing these days, but when elders are around the story is different. They constantly keep a tab on the younger generation's eating habits. Is this supposed to convey some meaning? I understand when someone is unfamiliar with the cuisine and looks out of curiosity. But otherwise its really rude. Note: I don't eat weirdly.
It is rude. Hardly do I go out here. But in India yes would go. But just ignore them. With a population like that, can't expect everyone to behave like how we would like so. With regards to eating habits and elders we do practice such thing in India. But I look like, whom do we ask to eat when guests are around. Do we eat first! No, right. So just think like that. Elderly and kids are alike. They can't tolerate without food for a long time even though they eat very little. So priority is based on this. I am not talking gender basis here. I don't have much experience of people staring whilst eating. So can't comment much on that. Just 2 c.
I generally don't stare at people's plate at my house. But the one time I did, my sister was trying to lose weight & was eating like a pigeon. I looked at her plates to make sure she is eating healthy I am guilty of looking at people plate at restaurants for the soul purpose of, if it looks good, then I will order that. Sometimes I tell the waiter, I will have what the 2nd table person is having . Now thanks to yelp, me looking at other tables have decreased
Even abroad I see the same behaviour with Indians. Very annoying at times. Mostly women do this. I usually eat after everyone's done, especially when ILs visit and stay. But even then the older ladies keep monitoring. I am OK with eating later, but when someone observes intensely it puts me off. Its good to think elders and kids are alike. Will keep this in mind going forward. Also its a different perspective on staring. May be the person is just hungry and is looking unknowingly!
It's really odd to look at someone while eating, my MIL does this always and keeps on saying ' my son doesn't eat like you' or ' look at your wife, how she eats' or 'wish he would eat like you'..I really hate this way of hers, not only while eating also while cooking my ILs observe me a lot, which really makes me mad. Why don't they treat their son & daughter in law alike??? Sad part is when your husband takes his mom's side..
hmmm I am observed for the amount I eat ! The number of pooris I eat, the number of dosas I eat, the number of bread slices I eat, biscuits I eat and then later am made fun of with "hahaha you like pooris right ! how many can you eat? " etc stuff. I was once told that I eat more than DH - a different way of saying I eat more than a man, maybe. I had to respond saying, "Oh yea because I work more - I work in the office and at home - So in order to survive I have to eat more" But yea I cannot eat to my satisfaction when my MIL is here. I am just not comfortable to eat when I know my intake is being monitored. I stopped eating well. I consider this as my "weight loss" period and find peace in the thought that my MIL takes great care of my carbs intake and does her bit to keep my calories low.
I too have experienced the same thing when I go to a hotel.. People are just waiting near our table for us to leave as early as possible. I will not be having any peace of mind to enjoy the food which I had ordered. I would feel very uncomfortable and would sometimes even leave the place abruptly. Some people even comment on the way you eat. I have even heard my cousin commenting on the amount of food the other person eats. I have felt annoyed and have also told him many times not to pass comments. Sometimes I have even showed dirty faces to people who continuously stand near me and stare at my plate. At home I do see my husband 's plate just to make sure that he eats well.. If he eats more than normal it means that the food is more tastier than the usual days and hence I would follow the same procedure which I had followed that day for that particular dish..
Similar story in my case too, but my ILs do not voice it but keep a irritated face. Like the way you responded to your MIL!!
Even unknown persons can be tolerated, but when you know someone and they judge a person based on food intake, its more difficult to handle. I agree there is a difference at home and when we eat out!!!
