Restrictions/dresscode to some married Indian women - very unfortunate

Rissy, I would say you have just been plain unlucky first time round with your ILs and ex. Yes, there are ILs who dictate a "dress code" for their dils and obedient sons like sheep follow their parents and impose it on their wives. But there are also very many who don't. Fortunately for me none of the ones you listed were ever imposed on me.

In fact I have to admit having had a lot of arguments with my own mom who used to keep telling me to wear a bindi, jewellery, wear sarees etc. There is no special virtue in wearing all these, nor anything great about not wearing them. It is just a matter of personal choice and convenience.

I do hope you find a good partner and ILs in the future who will be good to you and let be yourself.

 

Hufff small things catching bigg attention here....whats wrong when you were wearing a saree in occasions, its looks decent and good for your self.....and wearing mangal sutra is that a problem??? except few many people prefer to have all kinda ornaments, why cant you make ur mangalsutra as ornament with lil modifications or designing as you like. my final word is " behave like a roman , if you are in Rome"

 

There is nothing wrong in wearing a saree or mangal sutra, but what if the lady doesnt wanna?
I wear sarees and mangal sutra on occasions, but I dont like wearing them every day.
Sarees, I am not comfortable wearing them. Mangal sutra, I dislike ornaments, wear minimal artificial stuff too....go bare most of the times, so why shd I wear mangal sutra?

And most importantly, why these rules for women? And why hold them to it?

 

Proud of you girl! God bless!

 

Its our culture which we need to protect, if u go any where in d world, people will recognise you as Indian if you wear Bindi, its gives u a special look among others...Wearing sarees, many westerners are prefering salwars, sarees to wear coz of comfort rather than jeans and T shirts..Its more culture rather than rule.

 

Sarees very elegant, yes - but more comfortable than jeans and T shirts?????????? The need to preserve one's culture is fine, but it cannot be imposed on someone. One can choose to preserve one's own heritage, but not insist on someone else doing so. And why is it that only women need to preserve the Indian heritage? How about men wearing dhotis and angavastram and going around? Don't enough men wear trousers, shirts, and jeans and T shirts? That way they too would be recognized as Indian and look special.

 

how to rebel against work place dress code??

 

You were forced to wear saree....does that mean your ILs asked you to wear it on a particular occasion or did they ask you to wear it daily???
See if they had asked you to wear saree on certain ocassions then you shoud not have over reacted.
Your problem was that you gave your inlaws a shocker very early in the marriage.

See i got married into a family which had completely different sets of rules compared to mine.So my mother had asked me not to behave my "usual self" atleast for the 1st one year.Trust me for that one year i didnt cut my hair..noo jeans..and i used to put sindoor,mangalsutra etc... I used to get up early help my MIL in the kitchen....slowly and slowly i came out of the "perfect DIL" mode
Now the situation is that i dont do any of those things which i mentioned above( except for helping in the kitchen ...because thats my duty)
And because it was a slow transition nobody in the ILs house realised that i had broken all the rules ...i dont think they care about it now
I am happy that i followed my mother's suggestions(which BTW happens very rarely)

(Pls note: i am not the best DIL...infact not even close to it..its just that i have my own ways of getting things done)

 

Satchi
You hit nail...

lol....just imagining my dh in one, he would look wow !!!
Mega

 

The problem with indian men is, most of them are average-ugly looking.. So they feel the need to wear jeans and look modern /western, to compensate for their lack of looks..

However, indian women are naturally pretty ( compared to western counterparts, who apply too much make up ) and wearing saree's etc only enhance their beauty