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Remarrying Your Own Spouse?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by PurpleRoses, Jul 20, 2019.

  1. PurpleRoses

    PurpleRoses Silver IL'ite

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    Hi all,

    Just wanted to know, if anyone ever had renewed their wedding vows? Like literally remarry again your own spouse after few years of marriage?

    I know in sahstipoorti it is done. But I want to know if younger couples who got married just 4 or less than 5 years can remarry same spouse?

    Do you or anyone you know of have done it?

    My marriage is very similar and typical Indian arranged marriage with lot of dramas from in-laws which had quite affected my newly wed years of my marriage and bond with husband.

    Now, we have overcome those bad days and have a good bonding (touchwood). It's almost our 4th anniv is coming up and we plan to renew our marriage vows at tirumala.

    I have worst literally cheap gold digger characterless in-laws who have played every dirty game to try to separate me and husband.

    Now he supports me and we want to start our family too. So we plan to get remarried without any set of parents (since I don't want his parents to ruin this moment and so I felt it wont be fair if I just bring my parents and not his. So we mutually decided to remarry without anyone from our families).

    We want to just tell them we are going for darshan at tirumala and renew our marriage vows and make fresh promises to each other.

    Any leads? Have anyone ever did something like this?
     
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  2. Ramyarc

    Ramyarc Silver IL'ite

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    @PurpleRoses
    Sounds like a very romantic idea! Why don't you try a typical love marriage in a temple like Saathiya or Boys. Should be with couple of close friends. You can even stage a dummy registrar marriage. That will be more fun and you can cherish these memories life long! Just a suggestion....

    Regards
    Ramya
     
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  3. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

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    I think you should elope .
    And scandalize the audience at your wedding by proudly showing a baby bump, and pretending it is your first marriage.
    Have fun !!
    Remarriage is big business in Las Vegas.
     
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  4. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 Finest Post Winner

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    Dear @PurpleRoses ,

    If you see marriage is just a formal/official way of telling "others" you and your husband are entering into a lifelong bond / relationship etc. Since that has already been taken care going through the formal process again is something I'm thinking why?
    Since you have started afresh it's a wonderful thing. You got that understanding with him that's the best thing to have happened.
    Go on a honeymoon/vacation and enjoy some romantic times. :) Blessings of almighty is always there when you do the right thing without harming others which I'm sure you have done.

    Off course you want to go ahead and remarry again you could if you feel that's what gives you some kind of happiness/satisfaction. What I mentioned is just my opinion.

    Good luck. :)
     
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  5. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    It reminds me of an Ilite who had similar ideas. You can contact her but I don’t remember her username :neutral:
     
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  6. PurpleRoses

    PurpleRoses Silver IL'ite

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    Lol ... Your responses are always amusing . But I'm not that bold. Haha.
     
  7. PurpleRoses

    PurpleRoses Silver IL'ite

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    Thank you dear. I was afraid to put up this post fearing I may be laughed upon for this weird idea.

    We don't want a elaborate wedding like the 1st time we got married. Never could enjoy it that time. Nor could enjoy n celebrate till beinglast year for being married.

    As things are good now, we just want to have a simple temple ceremony just the two of us.
    With wedding vows taken afresh.
     
  8. PurpleRoses

    PurpleRoses Silver IL'ite

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    Oh I thought I'm the only one crazy haha.

    Basically we are from Hyderabad and strongly believe in Venkateswara swamy tirumala.

    I heard mass weddings and even free weddings are done there but they all mentioned it should be 1st marriage and mandatory for both set of parents to be present. Also they would register marriage etc which we didn't want.

    We just want to renew our wedding vows and forget bitter past and get more closer.

    I know people will say you are legally married what's the need to remarry same person again.
    For us, it's about the sentiment and the sacred importance of indian traditions in marriage.

    It is because we both valued the marriage that we survived the worst of times in our marriage.

    Things improved a lot once dh realised he cannot live without me and also saw the true colors of his parents and how they tried to separate us.

    Though still he has no guts to question them but being only son he can't throw them out of his life nor I will ever want that.

    I'm happy he has changed and been supportive and loves me a lot. We just want to celebrate this true bonding that we formed and survived our marriage through worst hits.
     
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  9. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

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    By all means ! Go ahead and enjoy your wedding without the drama/stress from the first one. I remember a non-desi colleague of mine that had a civil ceremony for her wedding . After many years ( close to being 50) she decided to have a white wedding , but just her and her husband. I thought that was such a wonderful idea.
     
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  10. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

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    One sacred importance of indian traditions in marriage is for the groom’s parents to make the married life a challenge to achieve happiness. Your parents in laws are merely fulfilling their sacred duty to you.

    If you really want a Thirumala wedding, and do it without both sets of parents, I would recommend contacting a local theatrical agent in Hyd. They supply extras for scenes in movies. Two sets of parents can be hired for a few thousand rupees. There have been cases where NRI have hired parents for both “girl dekko” and wedding. Very likely there may have been a discount price for bundling two occasions.

    Wedding memories can be reviewed from photos and video tapes. If married life sours wedding memories, then fixing what troubles the marriage on an ongoing basis would be the right fix. When you say that you both will have to continue to live with and tolerate your in-laws, you must apply some fix to their behaviors. Wedding vows can be repeated between married couples twice a day, and three times on Sundays. Married life in a collective family is a different thing.

    In phoren, we hire Elvis Presley imitators to come and bless the couple at marriages , and renewals.
     
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2019
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