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Relationship Turned Worst

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Independentgal, Nov 21, 2019.

  1. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    OP calculate what is the mortgage, credit card payments etc, and tell him that he need to contribute 50% of total expenses at least. I am sure you can find his approximate salary too. Some information may be available online for similar position. Another way is to open up a join checking account with joint credit cards , link that accounts for all mortgages and payments. Every month both of you contribute an amount to the same account. This way atleast you will know the total expenses. If his total payments are more than you, dont worry much. If he earns more he has to contribute more

    But rightnow working on you and your marriage is the first priority. Finance can be the next... But you need to wait till your relationship is back on track.
     
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  2. mangaii

    mangaii Platinum IL'ite

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    Maybe little bit compassion will help .
     
  3. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    People should practice what they preach first.
     
  4. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    You have to sign tax returns; and the W2 amount is on that form.
    Besides, I am little confused.
    (1)You write "He is extremely secretive about his finances and make me spend all my money with no savings left for me."
    (2)You also say that you have "started filing seperately on my insistance."
    I don't understand why you can't insist not spending all your money?
    This confusion leads me to write that IL's responses are based on one side, which may or may not be justified.
     
    Last edited: Nov 23, 2019
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  5. mangaii

    mangaii Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes even I agree what if you say there isn’t enough money . He will not give till you keep spending . If you say no money then he has to bring cash to the table
     
  6. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    Ladies, anyone really expects your husband to stand up in front of your parents?
     
  7. KayKuyil

    KayKuyil Silver IL'ite

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    i thought OP said he wouldn’t stand in their presence meaning he wouldn’t even be around when they are there and ignore them.
     
  8. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    sounded odd! I misunderstood.
     
  9. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Who the kid or OP?
     
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  10. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    No one including the OP expects this.
    What she meant was, her husband doesn't give basic respect to her parents.
    Dont try to justify his entire abusive behavior by just highlighting this .
    You do this in all threads
     
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